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Infertility
tired of listening to this **** (long & SAIFW)
OK, so maybe it was my bad to tell my own parents how miserable we are with the IF struggles. I understand that I am the unintended product of their having too much fun on spring break in college. I embrace that my mom feels like she had to delay her career because I was born, and that she kind of lives vicariously through my career. Also, I fully accept that they feel that fertility treatments are wrong.
BUT. I am really, really, effing sick and tired of having the same discussion with them every week. They stress how wonnnnderful my job is and how great I am at it (let's ignore the fact that, I hate my job, have for years, only stay to get the cash for IF treatments, and after nearly 10 years of busting my butt, would rather be a SAHM for a few years and explore what my next steps could be.)
Then my mom asks me, what exactly is our fertility problem again. (Umm... it's the same exact thing I told you the last effing 500 times - husband has some issues, as well as my PCOS/diabetes.)
Then one of them mentions a cousin of mine, who is 42, single, has a high-powered corporate job, and loooves her life. (Except that she calls me crying every couple months about how lonely she is. And unlike me, she works in an industry that is not completely and utterly boring. Let's also not forget about another relative of ours, who hung herself a few years ago due to her own fertility problems. As you can see, I don't really have a lot of empirical proof that childless = happy.)
Then comes the question, that aren't we going to bankrupt ourselves with fertility treatments, and isn't it irresponsible to have a baby when our house is underwater? (Isn't it more irresponsible to have a baby when you're barely old enough to vote, versus having one in your thirties when the economy's in a slump? Yeah, our home's market value is a bit less than what we paid for it... just like 99% of the USA. Are we going bankrupt? Not really. We make over 200K a year, and are thus able to stash away money for IF treatments.)
All this is interlaced with the not-so-subtle theme of "Why does your husband travel so much? Can't he get a better job?" (Uh, where do you think the money comes from? And have you read a newspaper in the last two years? Jobs aren't exactly easy to come by these days...)
I'm tired of this ***... It's like, you don't have to agree with what I'm doing, but understand that they don't get a say. Period. And seriously, when all they do is snark at me, it makes me feel like they're just going to carry this info back to their snotty, small-minded small-town frenemies for gossip.
Why do I need to be kicked when I'm down? Would it effing kill them to support me?
Can I just SCREAM? It's not even that I don't love them, it's that I need them to STFU if all they can say is ignorant crap.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: tired of listening to this **** (long & SAIFW)
Thank you! I get it that I have a strong resume and good academic record, but it's like... I don't really give a flying crap. If I could turn back time and be a complete f*ck up in high school and college to shut people the F up about why aren't I more grateful to have this woooonderful career, I would!
I want a baby, and bonuses and material things aren't going to fill that void!
Unexplained Infertility
After two Clomid cycles, three injectable IUI cycles, two IVFs, two miscarriages, and one lap surgery, IVF #2 has brought us our little boy!
TTC #2
After months of being postponed or cancelled, FET #1.3 (Natural FET) brought us twin girls!
((hugs))
I can empathize my mom so doesn't get it, she's all "it'll happen, be patient, you don't know how much work it'll be having kids" etc. It pisses me off.
I had enough one day and sent her the youtube video for "I would die for that" it made the point. She may not be as supportive as I'd like but at least she keeps her mouth shut now.