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Success after IF
RP from TTTC- Selecting a Donor
(I received some helpful feedback from TTTC. Some recommended reposting here.)
DH is NOA, and our only option is donor sperm. It is not easy to make a selection. Mainly because I thought I had made my selection when I married DH. 
So, we just spent around $150.00 for 7 donor's baby photos and silhouettes, only to rule out 4 right off the bat.
If you've had to choose a donor (whether egg or sperm), aside from physical characteristics, how did you make your final selection?
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Re: RP from TTTC- Selecting a Donor
I'm so excited to see you finally in the selection process! ?This has been a long time coming!! ?
We made our final decision based on responses to essay questions that were part of the free profile that we got to see for every donor (we used Fairfax Cryobank). ?They answered questions about their childhood, favorite memories, etc, and there was one in particular that resonated with us based on DH's similar experiences, likes, and dislikes. ?It was almost eery how alike they were. ?
It's not an easy decision. ?It took us several weeks to choose a donor, but when we did, we definitely felt like we'd found the right one. ?
Good luck! ?Can't wait to see you over here!
?
We basically picked the donor that we were most comfortable with. I think I had narrowed it down to one that I was OK with (I wasn't thrilled with any of them because they weren't DH), then DH and I ordered the medical profile and decided whether we were comfortable with their medical history and their personality profile. We probably put a lot less thought into it than some people did.
This brought tears to my eyes. Oh, how I know how you feel.
BUT, congratulations on taking this step. It is a momentous one and you are right to take it so seriously.
First of all, we used a website called spermcenter.com to assist in narrowing down our choices. It helps search dozens of banks at once using the criteria you choose. Of course, once we made our choice we made sure the bank was a reputable one, but we did choose the donor first and the bank second. I know most people do it in the reverse. In any case, like KJD, the single most important factor in our decision was the essay. It was in the donor's handwriting and we felt we were able to really tell the kind of person he is. Not even so much through WHAT he wrote (not to downplay it), but through HOW he wrote it. It really struck a chord with both of us.
Though we did choose someone with similar physical features to DH, the physical likeness was not a huge factor for us. Photos were not available through our bank, but they did offer photo-matching, which we took advantage of. It just so happened that our first choice was the best match with DH (but we would have chosen him otherwise).
I think much like your husband, when you find the right donor you will know. I'd be happy to talk more with you about it if you want...just PM me or email me at kjsp7 (at) hotmail. Good luck!!
LO #1 - 1 unmedicated/self-monitored IUI w/ donor sperm.
LO #2 - 1 m/c, 2 BFNs, 4th IUI worked (unmedicated/self-monitored with new donor sperm).
Life is beautiful!
As tough as it is to move with the donor selection process, it's great to see that you're taking the next step!
Other than physical characteristics, our bank offered many services that we used in selecting a donor to include, donor essay, audio interview, staff impressions, medical history, and personality profile. Of course we wanted a relatively "clean" medical history and we chose the donor who had a similiar personality and common interests as DH. It was kind of spooky how similiar they were in personality and physical description.
Good luck!