Advice please (Long and a vent)

heather121184 · June 2009

My husband and I picked out our daughter's name as soon as we found out I was pregnant (we had a boy name too just in case). Now that everyone knows we are having a girl, they have asked us about names. In retrospect, I should have just said "we are not set on one yet", but I told them all the name (Gabrielle Olivia). As soon as I told them the name, I also mentioned I did not want her called Gabby. I am just not a fan of the nickname, and like Gabrielle as a whole name much better.

Well now, people are still calling her Gabby, and some even said they will call her Olivia because they like the middle name better! I am so frustrated! I tell them everytime not to call her that, that I want her called Gabrielle, but they all tell me that she is going to be called Gabby no matter what I do anyway, since that is just the nickname everyone uses for Gabrielle. I even suggested other nicknames they could call her that I would be okay with, but no one is listening.

I honestly have no idea what else to say to these people. I am not a yeller, but I almost yelled at my FIL when he called her Gabby yesterday! Any advice?

saraprice · June 2009

We are having the same problem. Our LO will be Kate, not Katie or Kat. When people call her either we just correct them and say her name is Kate, nothing else.

BlairWaldorf · June 2009

I just tell people that we're not nicknaming him yet.

We'll wait & see what nickname fits him when he arrives. So far, people have respected that.

4realyo · June 2009

My dad once told me that you should only worry/stress about things that you have control over. You dont have control over what other people call your child, besides telling them her name. You can call her by name & when she goes to school, she can tell her teacher any nickname that she prefers & thats about it. Im sure once she is here if you pick another nickname, people will start using it. Gabrielle is pretty long & I think most people will tend to shorten it so it might be good to come up with an alternative nickname than Gabby if you dont like it.

Ali-B · June 2009

I don't know that I would worry about it too much until the baby is born. My SIL named her kid Alexander, and they did not want him to go by Alex. When people called him that, she would gently correct them and say "he goes by Alexander" as opposed to "his NAME is Alexander".

Jocelyn0415 · June 2009

My friend had a little boy 2 years ago and named him Samuel. She was adament that no one call him Sam or Sammy. There have been a few people that call him Sammy, but she quickly corrects them and says, "Samuel." It honestly has not been a problem. I hope that people can respect your wishes!

Ali-B · June 2009

Ali-B:
I don't know that I would worry about it too much until the baby is born. My SIL named her kid Alexander, and they did not want him to go by Alex. When people called him that, she would gently correct them and say "he goes by Alexander" as opposed to "his NAME is Alexander".

And everybody calls him by his full name. He is 5 now.

star21gazer · June 2009

Oh I am sorry...that really is frustrating. It's like you want to say Hey we named her that for a reason and we want her called this. I'm not sure why other people think they have a say in it. Now when she gets older and if she wants to be called that and her friends call her that then unfortunately there isn't much you can do but until then I am not sure but it sounds like the only thing you can do is keep correcting people and call her by her full name.

heather121184 · June 2009

BlairWaldorf:

I just tell people that we're not nicknaming him yet.

We'll wait & see what nickname fits him when he arrives. So far, people have respected that.

Hm, I will try this one. *Fingers crossed*

DiscusCoach · June 2009

My mom had the same problem w/ me. My name is Bernadette and people were calling me Berni. Stick to your guns. I like being Bernadette and not Berni!

wordtoyourmother · June 2009

There is not much you can do but correct people on it. If someone insists on calling my kids something other than what I named her - I'd just ignore them. Its inevitable. Our kids will end up getting nicknames that they hate too. You just can't get upset if your kid ends up being called Jackie if her name is Jaqueline and so on.

shelby9201 · June 2009

Sorry you are going through this. I don't have any advice for you, but this helped me confirm our decision to not reveal our daughter's name until she is born. I hate to say it, but there really won't be much you can do aside from correcting people each time they use "Gabby". From my experience, people are going to do what they are going to do anyway, regardless of what you say. To this day, I still have people call me Shell or Shelly instead of Michele, despite my vigorous protest to either abbreviation.

Hang in there!

Twistedpixie7@aol.com · June 2009

I totally understand where you are coming from! We are naming our daughter Anastasya. ?I have pretty much laid down the law that she WILL NOT be called, Ann, Anna, Annie or anything of that nature. ?Some people tried it and I told them NO. ?I said they can either call her by her name or they can call her Stasya. ?That is the nickname we have for her already, but I still like her name as a whole better. ?

My best friend which will be an "auntie" to her doesnt like the name so she said she is going to call her Anya....I just about slapped her for that! ?Im like you are not going to make up a name to call my daughter because you dont like the name we picked out! ?And shes doing it more because she doesnt really like my bf(long story) and to piss me off she made up a name, since he came up with Anastasya and she doesnt like it.?

?Stand by what you like and just correct them until they get it through their heads that she will not have Gabby as a nickname! ?Be firm!?

heather121184 · June 2009

4realyo:
My dad once told me that you should only worry/stress about things that you have control over. You dont have control over what other people call your child, besides telling them her name. You can call her by name & when she goes to school, she can tell her teacher any nickname that she prefers & thats about it. Im sure once she is here if you pick another nickname, people will start using it. Gabrielle is pretty long & I think most people will tend to shorten it so it might be good to come up with an alternative nickname than Gabby if you dont like it.

Very true. When she is older if she chooses Gabby as her nickname, then I will respect her choice, but I don't want to start off that way. It probably doesn't help that hormones are making me more upset about this than I should be Smile

jrnewhook · June 2009

When my friends would call the house when I was a kid and ask for me b my nickname she would say, "oh, sorry you must have the wrong number, I don't know a ____". Needless to say it worked and I can only name about three or four people to this day who call me by the shorter version of my name.

neonvicki81 · June 2009

I had a friend named Gabrielle and she hated being called Gabby herself. She thought it was funny so she told people if they wanted to nickname her, to call her G-Money. you can always tell people that and then see what they say!! That should get some looks!

RaeAnt · June 2009

Unfortuanely, there will always be people assuming that "X" is the nick name and it's ok to call them that even after being told the person's name. My husband deals with that all the time. His name is Anthony, he'll introduce himself as such and immediately the person will start calling him Tony. Umm.. no,,,, did I stutter.... Depending on who and where it is, he won't respond and when the person doesn't get it, one of us will say that Tony isn't his name or he doesn't respond to Tony or whatever. We both find it a bit brazen, especially in a work environment for you to be introduced to someone new and immediately start using a nickname. It's just rude. You weren't given that privilege yet if ever. PLus my Dh uses Ant, as a nn not Tony....he has several issues with various Tonys he know, both in and out of the family.

So I guess my only advice is to ignore them....act like you didn't hear them when they use the wrong name, or continually correct them. Some people will get it, others never do.

Max'smom · June 2009

It would be annoying. But people are going to call her what they call her. You can correct but nicknames happen. My mom threw a fit when my brother was born that his name was Christopher, not Chris. Only my mom and grandma call him Chirstopher by the time he started school he was Chris.

urbanbaby09 · June 2009

You can plan to call her by her full name, but you may be the only one who does so. My mother tried this exact thing with my name, and even she gave up after a while. My full name does not fit my personality, but my nickname does. It all depends on the child.

heather121184 · June 2009

Thanks everyone for the advice!

SLHurst11 · June 2009

heather121184:

Well now, people are still calling her Gabby, and some even said they will call her Olivia because they like the middle name better! I am so frustrated! I tell them everytime not to call her that, that I want her called Gabrielle, but they all tell me that she is going to be called Gabby no matter what I do anyway, since that is just the nickname everyone uses for Gabrielle. I even suggested other nicknames they could call her that I would be okay with, but no one is listening.

"Well, you know that I want her called Gabrielle, and as long as our close friends and family call her that, other people should pick up on it."

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