Trying to Get Pregnant

feeling discouraged (long)

Here i am, 11dpo on cycle #8.  I poas yesterday, and there was the bfn.  I should be expecting af tomorrow.  I did not chart this cycle, so I guess I don't really know if I am 11dpo, but all of my past cycles have been pretty much spot on consistent with my cm and o day.  I just can't believe that I am actually going to be starting cycle #9 any day now!!!  I know that it is my own fault, I was one of those, Oh, I'll get pregnant right away, people.  I just can't wrap my mind around the fact that sex + ovulation = no baby, 8 times already!! 

I had visited my obgyn about a week ago, for another issue, and I had mentioned that we were ttc and on cycle 8, and she didn't seem concerned at all.  I just sometimes feel like it is never going to happen.  And to add salt to the wound, I just had to pick up my bridesmaids dress for my friends wedding in October, the dress I ordered 2 sizes bigger, because at the time I could have been 7 months pg for her wedding.  Now, it is probably going to cost me a fortune to get it altered. 

I guess I don't know when to start really getting worried, or when to look into a SA for my DH.  I am just getting exhausted every month with the same routine, and the same results, I feel like I am chasing a dream, something that I will never really have. 

Sorry about the long vent, but I am just having a hard time today

 

Re: feeling discouraged (long)

  • Sorry to hear that, i think everyone goes through this at one time or another, hang in there!
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  • I understand your frustration but you kind of set yourself up for the dress thing. You never tempt fate like that.

    It can take up to 12 months for perfectly healthy couples to conceive. I would start looking into testing when you get closer to that date. Good luck.

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  • Im sorry. I have had 2 m/c and my doctor still tells me we are in the 80% group who do conceive within the first year of trying. I just gave her a blank stare but shes the doctor not me. Maybe try getting a second opinion?
  • imageHyfagal:

    I understand your frustration but you kind of set yourself up for the dress thing. You never tempt fate like that.

    It can take up to 12 months for perfectly healthy couples to conceive. I would start looking into testing when you get closer to that date. Good luck.

    This exactly.

    I'm sorry you're frustrated.  But keep in mind that it can take about a year for a perfectly healthy couple to get pg.  I know it's easier said than done, but try to be patient for now.

    Also, try not to plan around a possible pregnancy in the future.  Doing this will only make things harder for you if you don't conceive right away. 

    GL! 

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  • hang in there hunny! it will happen!!
  • I'm in the exact situation as you.  It sucks.  Of all of my girlfriends I have had, by far, the hardest time getting that elusive BFP.  I'm here, if you wanna talk :)
  • the only reason that I ordered the dress bigger was because at the time, I was on cycle #4, so I though we had a good chance to be pregnant by the time October came.  I know, stupid me.

     

  • imagepinkitty:
    the only reason that I ordered the dress bigger was because at the time, I was on cycle #4, so I though we had a good chance to be pregnant by the time October came.  I know, stupid me.

    You need to stop putting time limits on this. It will more often that not end in disapointment.

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  • Hang in there. I know exactly how you feel. I'm already in cycle 10 (had to think about that twice because I lost count after cycle 8) and it can be hard sometimes.

    Why don't you set up an appointment with your dr so you can get started on all the testing?

  • (((Hugs)))  I think we all have our moments when we feel a little discouraged when we haven't received our BFP after trying for a while.  I try to keep in mind that it takes a year for a healthy couple to conceive, and at times I chant it over and over during my frusterated moments. I hope you get your BFP soon.

    For me I have all these other factors to keep in mind and it is hard even though we have only been trying Since January of '09 which really isn't a long time but when you have a medical condition that doesn't seem to be willing to pause and a Neurologist that wanted you pregnant the first month you started trying. 

  • Hang in there. I think we have all done something at some point because of the IF I am pregnant .. Might not have been as big a deal as getting a dress to big, but something. I had to replace a bra and I love VS bras.. BUT decided I would get a less expensive one from target instead.. just  in case I couldn't fit in it in the near future.  I know this isn't the same, and I know it isn't the healthiest thing to do, BUT we all do it to some extent.

    So don't beat yourself up! Your time will come.

  • i totally feel your pain.  I'm pretty good about staying positive through most of my cycle - but come about 8 DPO, I start to get really down for some reason.  Maybe it is hormones - or maybe it is the fact that I might have to start the TTC process all over.  And while I totally feel your pain, it is also nice to know that their are other people in the same boat.  I guess we just need to have faith that it will happen for us one day.  Hugs!
  • We have all been there.  I do agree with pp that you shouldn't plan for the what if's in life, but you also ordered that dress many months ago.  I did a lot of that sort of thing like not drinking while out w/ friends or not planning a trip because I thought I'd be 8 months.  We recently booked that same trip to go w/ friends because we're aren't KU yet.  I'm not taking a break from TTC so we're not KU on the trip either, if it happens it happens.  I'm just happy we won't miss out on the opportunity now. 

    These days are hard ones; I'm sure you'll be feeling much better tomorrow though.  Good luck to you!

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  •  I know what you are going through i was one of those ppl that thought o we'll have no trouble getting pregnant but here we are on cycle 3 and still nothing...its sooooooo fustrating because while we have been trying my sister and cousin have gotten preggers w/o even trying.
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  • Sorry to hear that you are discouraged. I think we all go through that at one point.
  • I'm sorry...hang in there!  I'm also going into my 8th month of trying (if my period will ever show up).  GL!
  • Hang in there, i hope you get your bfp soon!
  • We've all been there and it sux. Right around cycle 8 for us I started stressing out about it, and ended up not even ovulating that cycle! Its hard to find a balance between enjoying your life with your husband, and obsessing over ttc, but ya need to try!  Maybe take up a new hobby or something along those lines? If this cycle is a bust DH is going to have an SA done for peace of mind, but thats as far as we're going for now. Good luck!
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