Adoption
Planning ahead...
What kinds of questions did you ask when you "got the call?"
What did you ask the caseworker and then if you met the birth mother, what did you ask her?
What shouldn't you ask?
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Re: Planning ahead...
We let her lead the conversation -- she had lots of questions for us. We tried to listen more than we talked, but the questions we did ask were along the lines of:
- how are you feeling?
- how far along are you?
- do you know the gender?
Questions not to ask:
- do you know who the father is?
- why are you placing/giving up the baby?
- have you ever placed a baby for adoption before?
- or basically anything that will make her feel judged or less than
If you have any specific questions let me know. Our relationship is 100% open so far (in fact, we spent today at our birthmother's home for her baby's 1st birthday and they're coming to our house tomorrow to swim). I'm happy to answer any questions you might have!
Thanks so much. I thought I remembered reading that you should keep the questions geared to her. I also thought I would ask her about herself - if she has any hobbies, what type of job she might have, what she likes to do. That kind of thing.
Am I on the right track?
Oh, thanks - I'm glad to hear we've got the right idea.
Thanks so much!