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North Carolina Babies
ECUGirl2004
member
Bad night last night. :( Long...
ECUGirl2004
member
Getting Nate to bed recently has become a struggle again. Actually, it's not getting him to bed that's the struggle... it's just that bed time is taking a LONG time now. After his bath, he doesn't want to sit down and read anymore. He wants to run around his room, playing with everything. It is taking him a really long time to finally settle down enough to sit for a few minutes and read. I do not nurse him to sleep or hold him until he goes to sleep, but I do like to know that he is drowsy before I put him in his crib. Normally as soon as he starts getting drifty, I put him down and leave. The past couple of nights, he won't even sit down in my lap at all... so I end up in his room for over an hour trying to get him to sit down and chill so that he'll get drowsy.
Anyway, so last night I got frustrated and put him in his crib (he was fully awake and not happy about it) and I told DH that he needed to go try to get DS to sleep because I needed a break. At that point, I had been in his room for over an hour. DH went in for a few minutes and then came out (with DS screaming and crying in his crib) and told me that this wasn't going to work. He said that we needed to let DS CIO.
I have done Ferber in the past, so I am not opposed to some crying. However, DS has molars coming in and he wasn't calm/quiet at all yet. I know him, and I know that if he is calm and quiet, he'll go on to sleep on his own. But I knew that at that point, he just wasn't there yet. I tried telling DH that, and he just fought with me. He kept cutting me off and saying really crappy stuff like "Oh yeah, you've done all the research" etc. He told me he didn't think DS was in that much pain from his molars, despite the fact that when DS was crying earlier in the evening, DH said "I'm sure it's just because of his molars." *sigh*
So anyway, DH pretty much decided that we should let DS CIO. I didn't want to, but I felt like if I intervened, DH wasn't going to help me if I needed it. So I went out and took a short walk to clear my head and to calm down.
When I came back in (about 10 mins later), DH was in the bathroom cleaning DS up. He had hit his head and nose on the side of his crib and blood was everywhere. 
After that, I just went to bed with DS in our bed because I felt really bad about the situation.
One thing that really annoyed me was that DH said we didn't need to change the crib sheets b/c there "wasn't that much blood on them." WTF? Guys are so weird sometimes. Um, I don't want DS sleeping on any sheets with blood on them. And I bet he would have let him keep his bloody pajama shirt on too (I changed it of course).
I'm not really looking for advice or anything. I'm just venting.
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Re: Bad night last night. :( Long...
I'm so sorry you had a rough night! Poor Nate -- I'm sure the bump didn't feel good but he probably loved the snuggle time with you in bed after.
I thought of you last night actually because I think you posted a week ago or something about having issues with Nate crying out in his sleep, not settling (was that the case?). I had a rough time getting Natatlie to sleep last night too and am starting to wonder if maybe her molars are starting to come in also. In addition to always jamming her fingers pretty far back into her mouth, she's starting having a low grade fever. Last night, although she went to sleep in about 5 min, she woke up 20 min later crying out in her sleep and continued doing this on and off every 5-10 min for the next hour and half. Rocking her didn't seem to help -- she'd start up again after putting her back in the crib. And some times when I'd go in after she'd been crying/whining on and off for a little while, she didn't even want me to pick her up. I was so confused as to what was the issue. It wasn't her all out crying, I don't want to be in bed episodes.
They like to keep mixing it up for us! I hope he sleeps better tonight! Good luck!
I'm so sorry you had such a rough night! And I hate it when DH and I aren't on the same page like that. Being a mom is just different, and guys don't get it. They don't understand how it pains us to hear them cry, or anything else that is just mommy instinct. He probably didn't mean the things he said, he was just frustrated and taking it out on you. Cutting molars was pretty bad for Eli, and it lasted about a month. Some nights he would just cry in his crib all.night.long. And he wouldn't even really be awake, just crying. He ended up in our bed a couple of times. I just kept him as drugged up as possible on Motrin and Orajel, along with the teething necklace and teething tablets, hoping something would help. I normally don't use Orajel, but with the molars I just had to. I hope Nate feels better soon, it sucks for them to be in pain and not really understand why.
What time is bedtime? Maybe he's just ready to stay up longer. In the past couple of months we have moved Eli's bedtime up 30 mins-1 hour.
I keep thinking this too, but it's just really hard to tell! By 7:00, he seems so tired! He is falling down constantly, fussy, frustrated, etc. So we go upstairs and get in the bath around 7-7:15. Normally he loves the bath, but sometimes recently he's been protesting the whole time in the bath too. We go into the nursery between 7:15 and 7:30 normally (though last night we pushed everything back a little, and we didn't go in there until 7:45). Last night, he didn't go to sleep until 9 pm.
It's so confusing. He is a pill downstairs and it's clear that he is tired. But when I take him into his room, he is happy to buzz around from thing to thing playing with this and that. He may not get tired, but I do! I sit there and nearly fall asleep waiting for him to settle down.
I'll try some orajel on his molars and see if that helps. We have been doing motrin before bed. And I'm going to re-visit my Ferber book and read up on toddler stuff. Maybe there's something useful in there too.
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I'm so sorry! I hope it gets better soon b/c bedtime issues are NO.FUN.AT.ALL.
And don't feel too bad about Nate bleeding, J did the exact same thing (except it was his mouth) when I tried to let him CIO when he wouldn't go down for a nap recently (which is usually not a problem at all). The he proceded to bust his mouth open two more times within the week! It was so scary seeing all that blood!
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What if you took him upstairs to play for a little while before his bath in the nursery, like around 6:30? Then do the bath at the regular time and maybe he won't be so excited to play with the stuff in his room.
We always let Eli play again for a little while after his bath before settling down for bed. I don't know why, but that's just what seems to be working. We do his bath shortly after 6, and then he stays up for another hour or so before settling back down for bed. He's just never been able to go straight from bath to bed.
I've heard teething tablets are great too. My friend's pedi doesn't recommend Oragel because it can numb their tongue and be a choking hazard. Not sure about that....
I never felt like we got any results from teething tablets, but I'm going to try them again. I got some other tablets that I don't like (Humphrey's) and I need to go buy more Hylands. The Humphrey's ones don't dissolve in the mouth, which is lame.
I feel like we are just grasping at straws trying to figure out a new routine that is going to work. Maybe tonight we'll try downstairs play, nursery play, bath, and then see what happens. I can't force him to sit in my lap and read anymore, since he just climbs out if he doesn't want to be there.
And... of course we're flying across the country next week which is going to throw everything off even more. Maybe he'll find my sister's 1 bedroom apt in Seattle to be very relaxing. :P
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We haven't had much success with teething tablets either.
Are you reading him the same books you've always read before bed? When Natalie gets sick of a book, she's almost impossible to get to sit still on my lap. Once I try a new book, she's back to enjoying it.
I think the nursery play before bed sounds like a good idea. He might be bored of being downstairs at that moment and need a change of scenary before settling in for the night.
Good luck!
I am so sorry to hear that ECU!!!! I bet that really upset you that he hit himself and drew some blood out ( I know that would upset me, I would've started bawling I'm sure!!!)
DH & I have definitely already had our share of arguments about different little things with DD, and I'm sure its not the last of them either.
Hope tonight is better and I also hope Nate starts getting a little calmer for bedtime!
I am wondering if you are putting him down too late... is he playing outside a lot at daycare? Between that and walking he just might need to go to sleep a little earlier. It is exhausting for them to run around all day! And even more so when he is outside. If we put dd down too late she usually gets that 2nd wind and is crazy bouncing off the rails of her crib.
I've wondered the same thing!
It's so confusing!
They do go outside twice during the day at daycare. *sigh* I don't know what to do.
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Im sorry! I dont have any advice bc Im not there yet.
But DH and I have had many disageements with AT and it is mainly only bc he is sick at the time. They just have no idea our instincts...and dont get it. And many times DH gets offended too.
Sorry you had such a rough night. He could just be going through a phase too. I know we would hit a few weeks (that would feel like an eternity) where Ben would be a complete bear about somethings and then go back to his regularly scheduled sweetness.
Good luck and I hope tonight is better!
Hugs ECU! I hope tonight is better!
I'd try Hylands again, we've had pretty good luck with those and Motrin for teething issues.
And hopefully your DH will come around some, it sucks when you are not on the same page!
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This is what we do. We go upstairs between 6:45-7:00 and let Liam play in his bedroom until we start bathtime at 7:15. After his bath, we dress him for bed, and he goes straight into the rocking chair for his bottle and bedtime story. I don't give him a chance to get down and start working himself back up again.
So sorry you had such a rough night! It sucks even more when you end up fighting with DH - it seems like DH and I always fight more when Liam is crying, probably because it sets our nerves on end already.
GL!