How do you deal with smokers that want to hold your LO?

lata82 · June 2009

We were at my IL's yesterday and my SIL IL's were there and they smoke a lot, I won't even go in there house it smells so bad. Anyway DH was supposed to tell his mom not to offer the baby to them as she always does. Well he fogot and I look up and she is holding T on her shoulder and all I could think about it T's mouth, nose, skin touching her smoke filled clothes. I glared at DH and told him to put a burp cloth under her mouth. I started to think what I would have said is she had asked me to hold her. I have no idea. What do you say to people that you don't want holding your LO?

Gregsbride22 · June 2009

I have no clue. A couple of DH's friends & family members smoke and I never know what to say. Luckily we've only been around them once and they only held him for a minute. It bothered me the whole time though.

steve&heather · June 2009

"Not right now, s/he is just settling in for a little nap" or a simple "no".

berty12777 · June 2009

I'm not a very confrontational person and I HATE uncomfortable situations, but this is one of the things that I suck it up for. I will tell people straight out that I am concerned with the effects of 3rd hand smoke and would prefer if they not hold Allison while there is smoke in their hair, clothes, etc. If they insist, I just ask that they wash their hands and limit Allison's exposure to their clothing (not cuddling her up in their necks, etc.). I'm not gonna lie, it's gotten quite uncomfortable and I've ruffled some feathers, but, to me, it's worth it. GL!

jnealet · June 2009

You could just say that you need your baby "fix" right now and aren't ready to give her up.

Or you're going through baby withdraw.

You're addicted to your baby and just can't give her up, no matter how many times you try.

1stMate · June 2009

This is a tough one and I'll have to deal with it next weekend. I like the burp cloth idea. Can you say that your LO doesn't do well being held by strangers?

lata82 · June 2009

berty12777:
I'm not a very confrontational person and I HATE uncomfortable situations, but this is one of the things that I suck it up for. I will tell people straight out that I am concerned with the effects of 3rd hand smoke and would prefer if they not hold Allison while there is smoke in their hair, clothes, etc. If they insist, I just ask that they wash their hands and limit Allison's exposure to their clothing (not cuddling her up in their necks, etc.). I'm not gonna lie, it's gotten quite uncomfortable and I've ruffled some feathers, but, to me, it's worth it. GL!

wow, I can't beleive somone would push the subject with you! That takes a lot of nerve and I would be pissed at that point.

cluiss1 · June 2009

I just tell them no because I don't want Jacob is breathe in the smoke on their clothes plus he's chewing on everything, so I don't want him to get smoke in his mouth. It's that simple with me. Most of my family are smokers, and they know how much I hate it. They are more than happy to kill themselves, but they are not going to pass on their stench to my child.

H&Dmay21 · June 2009

Just say no. Or tell them they have to change their clothes first. Personally I could care less if it offends them - they aren't going to put my girl at risk just because they have an addiction. They have a choice - smoke, or hold the baby. It's one or the other. If they choose to smoke, then that's their problem.

bear2115 · June 2009

When there are people who ask to hold Maggie I just say, "I'm sorry she's been a little fussy, she needs her mamma," or "she's much better talking to you from here, she's a little scared of strangers" which are usually both lies, but it usually works. I feel bad doing it, but you do what you have to do ya know?

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