The birth mom put a name on the birth certificate and we changed it. It wasn't officially changed until finalization when Ben was 10 months old and we got a new birth certificate.
We didn't tell the birth mother his new name. She knew we were going to change it. Our situation was a little different. She didn't want to meet us or have any contact except letter and pictures through the agency.
Warning
No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
Our DD was almost 2 months old when she came home. BM had selected another name. BM asked us specifically to keep the middle name and we agreed, but was apparently fine w/ changing her first name.
BM made a memory box for DD w/ family pics and letters from herself and BGM and all the letters are adressed to her old name. I'm not sure exactly how we will address this...it's kind of a unique situation as BM took additional time to make her adoption plan!
Yes we did. We started calling her by the name we chose from the day she came home. This was not completely accepted by family at first, but now everyone is okay. (My DD's birth mother is my sister.) We chose a new name to signal to family that she is our daughter now and it really helped family see it that way. We also wanted to name our child and didn't like her birth name, plus it REALLY didn't work with our last name. Some thought that it was strange at first, but now they are fine. My sister was very angry but now she has accepted it.
The foster home she was in prior to coming home to us had also been calling her a different name. We will obviously explain to her that she has had 3 very special names in her life. It will just be part of her adoption story.
We named Quinn with his birth mom. She felt very strongly about having a voice in his name. We agreed when we saw how much it meant to her. To be honest, it probably helped that we liked the name options she gave us.
I think our situation is pretty rare and we have a very open adoption. At birth, she put his full name (including our last name) on his birth certificate.
I gave K one name, and her adoptive parents gave her another. We both had reasons and special significance to the names we picked. Unfortunately our choices did not go together. I know what K's names are, but when I talk about her I call her by the name that her birthfather and I gave her.
Our birthmother has requested a certain middle name if it's a girl. We will be giving her the full name we chose (first and middle) PLUS the middle name the birthmother chose -- if it's a girl. She'll have two middle names, both picked for special reasons and she'll know what they both mean.
If you have an open adoption, and the birthparents picked a name, I think it's pretty bad karma to change it upon finalization. It's not much to ask of you really -- and how often does we even use our full names? (I'm just using the word "you" in general -- not directed at you!) That's just my opinion though. If it's closed or foster/adopt and they don't profess any preference that's another story.
We have a closed adoption. The BM did not name her and did not want to know the sex. Her current birth cert. says baby girl on it. Once the adoption is finalized her new birth cert. will have the name we gave her. I would not change a child's name if they were over 2 unless they were old enough to make up their own minds about it. (some foster kids who were adopted older wanted to change their names-new start- new name)
no we did not change his name. she wanted nothing to do with the care of the baby. we had our own room in the hospital and when it was time to do the B.C. she told the to come to us and to put our last name down.
No. We named her together with her firstmom. She left the choice up to us, but we wanted her input. We had 2-3 names we were thinking of, and she picked the one she liked best. We LOVE her name!
Our first son has a good first name, Jesse, but his middle name was terrible, so we changed it to my maiden name. Our second son had a horrible name all together, we changed it and he asked us to( he was 5) but it was not changed drastically, just enough to make it normal. His middle name is also my maiden name. Samantha is keeping her first name and her middle name will be the name I chose if we had our bio child.
The birth mom put a name on the birth certificate and we changed it. It wasn't officially changed until finalization when Ben was 10 months old and we got a new birth certificate.
We didn't tell the birth mother his new name. She knew we were going to change it. Our situation was a little different. She didn't want to meet us or have any contact except letter and pictures through the agency.
Amy - did you start calling him Ben right away?
We are on the fence. We have had names picked out since we had first started ttc. We still love them, but i think we'll be open to talking with our BM and her feelings as well.
Re: Did you change your baby's name?
The birth mom put a name on the birth certificate and we changed it. It wasn't officially changed until finalization when Ben was 10 months old and we got a new birth certificate.
We didn't tell the birth mother his new name. She knew we were going to change it. Our situation was a little different. She didn't want to meet us or have any contact except letter and pictures through the agency.
Our DD was almost 2 months old when she came home. BM had selected another name. BM asked us specifically to keep the middle name and we agreed, but was apparently fine w/ changing her first name.
BM made a memory box for DD w/ family pics and letters from herself and BGM and all the letters are adressed to her old name. I'm not sure exactly how we will address this...it's kind of a unique situation as BM took additional time to make her adoption plan!
Yes we did. We started calling her by the name we chose from the day she came home. This was not completely accepted by family at first, but now everyone is okay. (My DD's birth mother is my sister.) We chose a new name to signal to family that she is our daughter now and it really helped family see it that way. We also wanted to name our child and didn't like her birth name, plus it REALLY didn't work with our last name. Some thought that it was strange at first, but now they are fine. My sister was very angry but now she has accepted it.
The foster home she was in prior to coming home to us had also been calling her a different name. We will obviously explain to her that she has had 3 very special names in her life. It will just be part of her adoption story.
We named Quinn with his birth mom. She felt very strongly about having a voice in his name. We agreed when we saw how much it meant to her. To be honest, it probably helped that we liked the name options she gave us.
I think our situation is pretty rare and we have a very open adoption. At birth, she put his full name (including our last name) on his birth certificate.
Our birthmother has requested a certain middle name if it's a girl. We will be giving her the full name we chose (first and middle) PLUS the middle name the birthmother chose -- if it's a girl. She'll have two middle names, both picked for special reasons and she'll know what they both mean.
If you have an open adoption, and the birthparents picked a name, I think it's pretty bad karma to change it upon finalization. It's not much to ask of you really -- and how often does we even use our full names? (I'm just using the word "you" in general -- not directed at you!) That's just my opinion though. If it's closed or foster/adopt and they don't profess any preference that's another story.
Amy - did you start calling him Ben right away?
We are on the fence. We have had names picked out since we had first started ttc. We still love them, but i think we'll be open to talking with our BM and her feelings as well.
I answered you below btw.