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shopping trip = FAIL (vent)

NHMountainBrideNHMountainBride
in Babies: 0 - 3 Months
Yesterday I went "back to work" shopping.  The original plan was for DH to watch DD, but because she won't take a bottle, he's afraid to be alone with her because he has no way to feed her if she gets hungry.  So she came with me.  She slept for the 30 minute car ride.  Woke up when we got to the store.  Managed to stay somewhat calm as I picked out things to try on (with a few laps around to store to keep her happy).  Once we entered the dressing room she started to scream.  I changed her diaper, nursed her, and put her back in the stroller.  I started to undress and she started screaming again.  So, we left, and she promptly fell asleep in the car and continued to nap for the next 4 hours.  Sigh.  Will I ever be able to leave my baby with someone else so I can do something for myself?  Thanks for listening.
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Re: shopping trip = FAIL (vent)

  • sherron83sherron83
    I'm just jealous you went shopping for a bit.... I've been trying to go shopping for clothes for the last 2 weekends.
    I don't BF but I understand your frustration....
    GL
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  • Mrs.AKPMrs.AKP
    you say she won't take a bottle... so what are you planning to do when you go back to work? i definitely would have left her home with DH. sooner or later she'll have to take a bottle...
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  • JARbabyJARbaby member

    Honestly, no baby starved to death that had food available. Are you there when DH tries to feed her? Is he super anxious and stressed. Babies pick up on all of that and will act accordingly.

    I would just go and tell DH to figure it out, just like I have to everyday.

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  • NHMountainBrideNHMountainBride

    imageMrs.AKP:
    you say she won't take a bottle... so what are you planning to do when you go back to work? i definitely would have left her home with DH. sooner or later she'll have to take a bottle...

    I know.  She will.  And this is why I've been *extremely* stressed out for the past several weeks.  I agree that I should just leave her with DH, but he gets so stressed out when she cries hysterically and there's nothing he can do.  If that happens when I'm around I nurse her, and she calms.  I guess I'm just worrying about stressing out DH, but then again, I've had plenty of stressful moments of my own when he's at work!  I think I'll talk to him about this and try leaving her with him in a couple of days.

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  • NHMountainBrideNHMountainBride
    imageJARbaby:

    Honestly, no baby starved to death that had food available. Are you there when DH tries to feed her? Is he super anxious and stressed. Babies pick up on all of that and will act accordingly.

    I would just go and tell DH to figure it out, just like I have to everyday.

    You're right, you're right.  And he's so good with her!  The only problem is that he can't feed her.  But I keep telling him that the worst thing that will happen is that she'll cry for the 3 hours I'm gone, and the likelyhood of that is slim, since she usually passes out after 20 minutes of crying (if no soothing works).

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  • JARbabyJARbaby member
    He needs to learn to stay calm because his stress is creating a worse issue. Tell him there is nothing to stress about. What is there to be stressed about? Babies cry. You fix it. Done. Never a reason to get stressed. If you make them cry, stop what you are doing. If they wont stop crying, go outside or put them in the bath, or turn on music, or the tv, distraction!
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  • NHMountainBrideNHMountainBride

    imageJARbaby:
    He needs to learn to stay calm because his stress is creating a worse issue. Tell him there is nothing to stress about. What is there to be stressed about? Babies cry. You fix it. Done. Never a reason to get stressed. If you make them cry, stop what you are doing. If they wont stop crying, go outside or put them in the bath, or turn on music, or the tv, distraction!

    You're right.  And she does respond well to these distractions.  Last night she was fussy and we put her in the tub and she calmed instantly.  He's actually a very good soother.  I just talked to him about it and he's willing to stay with her while I go out.  I will remind him of these strategies and tell him that I have confidence in his abilities (which I do!) before I go.  Thank you.  I feel better.

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  • I'mAcrossThePondI'mAcrossThePond

    imageMrs.AKP:
    you say she won't take a bottle... so what are you planning to do when you go back to work? i definitely would have left her home with DH. sooner or later she'll have to take a bottle...

    We tried to introduce DS to a bottle around 2 months too (he had taken one here and there a few times...but nothing consistent). He wanted NOTHING to do with it. DH tried to give him a bottle while I was at the grocery store. DS just cried and cried. That day I went on a nursing strike. I pumped and DH kept trying the bottle. By the end of the day, DS was taking the bottle.

    Tips:

    1. Lay LO on the floor in a boppy. Do not hold while bottle feeding at first. 

    2. If laying on the boppy does not work. Hold LO with one arm (cradle them) and feed them while you walk (you'll get sore arms...but the walking seems to distract them).

    3. Feed from a bottle RIGHT when they start to wake up from a nap...when they are still groggy they are more likely to take it. 

    4. Warm the bottles up HOT HOT HOT! Almost too hot.

    Those are things that helped us. 

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  • NHMountainBrideNHMountainBride
    imageI'mAcrossThePond:

    imageMrs.AKP:
    you say she won't take a bottle... so what are you planning to do when you go back to work? i definitely would have left her home with DH. sooner or later she'll have to take a bottle...

    We tried to introduce DS to a bottle around 2 months too (he had taken one here and there a few times...but nothing consistent). He wanted NOTHING to do with it. DH tried to give him a bottle while I was at the grocery store. DS just cried and cried. That day I went on a nursing strike. I pumped and DH kept trying the bottle. By the end of the day, DS was taking the bottle.

    Tips:

    1. Lay LO on the floor in a boppy. Do not hold while bottle feeding at first. 

    2. If laying on the boppy does not work. Hold LO with one arm (cradle them) and feed them while you walk (you'll get sore arms...but the walking seems to distract them).

    3. Feed from a bottle RIGHT when they start to wake up from a nap...when they are still groggy they are more likely to take it. 

    4. Warm the bottles up HOT HOT HOT! Almost too hot.

    Those are things that helped us. 

    Thank you.  I think it's time to try the nursing strike, and I will definitely try all of your tips!  I haven't tried the boppy yet...

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