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wanting to get get pregnant

MAYbPrettyMAYbPretty
in Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss
a close person lost her baby at 7 1/2 months pregnant  or so.   me and my husband want nothing more than to have a  child.  its been about 8 months since she lost her baby.  we feel so bad since we saw and were there for all her pain.  she is pregnant again now, but found out that we wanna have a baby.  shes really mad.  can anyone help me out?    we arent trying to hurt her at all,  but we really have been planning this for about a year and a half but were waiting for te right time.  i dont want her do be mad but we are not doing this to hurt her.......any advice?
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Re: wanting to get get pregnant

  • GinaincaliGinaincali member
    I don't understand she is pregnant again yet is upset because you guys want to have a baby?
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
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  • someflower6someflower6 member

    imageGinaincali:
    I don't understand she is pregnant again yet is upset because you guys want to have a baby?

    yes, this i'm confused about.

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  • Aimee810Aimee810
    I agree with everyone else -why is she mad? I could understand if she weren't already PG again and may be HURT by your news but not sure why she would be mad. Unless it has something to do with her fears of losing this baby too and you wouldn't have that worry. Hmmm...Being PG after a loss is very scarey.
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  • TravelinMamaTravelinMama member
    I'm really confused as well.  Why is she mad?
    Marie, wife to Ron, mom to DS
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  • TravelinMamaTravelinMama member
    On another note.  If you want a baby, than nothing should stop you and your husband from trying.  Unfortunetly bad things happen, but we can't plan our life around other people's misfortunes.  Good Luck trying.
    Marie, wife to Ron, mom to DS
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  • MAYbPrettyMAYbPretty
    yeah its hard.....i think shes scared she could lose again and i could have a healthy baby.  but it hurts that she is so mad she wont talk to me.  im not even pregnant yet either.  i just didnt know f that was wrong of me to try.Thanks ladies
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  • Megan928Megan928 member

    imageMAYbPretty:
    yeah its hard.....i think shes scared she could lose again and i could have a healthy baby.  but it hurts that she is so mad she wont talk to me.  im not even pregnant yet either.  i just didnt know f that was wrong of me to try.Thanks ladies

     I agree w/ pp. You can't plan your life around this person's misfortune and heartache. Just try to be the best friend you can to her and hopefully she will return the favor. 

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  • priya&peterpriya&peter member
    I'm confused too. I abolutely believe that getting pregnant after a loss is scary but to be mad at someone else who isn't pg yet after you are already pg again doesn't make sense to me,.   Maybe she feels like she was sharing all this really personal stuff with you and you were holding back and she is upset that you didn't confide in her sooner?  Or maybe she is just confused about her feelings about you having a easy time, but in any case, if she is a close friend of yours I would suggest you talk to her about why she is mad and tell her you care about her and want nothing but the best for her and hope she can feel the same way.  I absolutely agree though that this isn't the type of thing you should hold off doing for anyone else.  GL!
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  • coolteacher79coolteacher79

    As someone who has lost a full-term baby, I can understand where she is coming from. My hunch is that she is scared that if you two are pregnant at the same time, there's a chance she could lose the baby again and it would work out fine for you. Of course the reverse could be true, but as someone who has experienced loss, you don't always think of it that way.

    While I am not sure that being angry is the right thing, I can understand her feeling the need to maybe have a little distance form you. Not that YOU are doing anything wrong in wanting to have kids. It's just a whole messy part of it all... especially when it comes to a late loss or infant loss.

    But, if you and your husband feel that now is the right time, you do need to do what you feel you are being lead to do. Just know that it is your friend's hurt and brokeness over the loss of her child speaking when she seems upset with you... and tyr to be patient with her. It is really hard.

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