someone tell me to settle

Vuja_de · June 2009

i have been kind of freaking out over the whole missed miscarriage thing. i can not even imagine going into my doctor's office on the 18th and not finding a heart beat and finding out that the baby stopped growing even though i still have symptoms.

i know there is nothing i can do and worrying isn't going to change anything.. but i just can't stop thinking that i am going to go in on the 18th and get horrible news.

easjer05 · June 2009

I worry about it too.

But honestly - it's fairly rare. Truly. Your chances of a m/c after seeing the h/b are pretty low. It does happen, but often there is a cause found and it's surprising the baby made it as long as it did.

Just do your best to stay calm.

Shannonlea · June 2009

I havent had a m/c and I cant imagine how horrible it is but here is what I remind myself anytime I do think about it:

The odds are in your favor not to have a m/c and the further along you get, the less of a chance you have. And you cant control it so its best to leave that up to your body (and God, if you are so inclined) and not worry about something you cant change.

Hang in there.

Mrs.Wifey318 · June 2009

I know exactly how you feel. I have the same fears. I am so worried about a m/c but I have decided that I am just going to try not to stress and enjoy my pregnancy. I know you are going to get great news on the 18th and at least it isn't too far off. GL!!

Vuja_de · June 2009

thank you easjer... i just read so many sad stories on the miscarriage/pregnancy loss board about the women going in and finding out that they had a missed miscarriage.

i did google the percent of women who have a missed miscarriage and it is 1%. it just seems so prevalent on the mc/PL board

ibis · June 2009

I'm feeling the same way lately. I just keep telling myself I have a much greater chance of a healthy baby than I do of a m/c. My appt is on the 17th... it's not that far away, we'll make it.

Vuja_de · June 2009

thank you everyone...

i did see the heart beat at 6w 6d, and the baby was measuring right on track. i am just praying this little one is OK.

kmtfu · June 2009

Speaking from experience, I would highly encourage you to stay busy and stay away from these forums - particulary the loss forums.

SugarBaby07 · June 2009

I worry about it too. But I am trying my best to relax and let things be.

sarajo317 · June 2009

kmtfu:
Speaking from experience, I would highly encourage you to stay busy and stay away from these forums - particulary the loss forums.

This.. exactly. And to stay positive.

CapitolBaby · June 2009

As somebody who had a miscarriage in April, I just want to say that those girls on the miscarriage boards are the strongest girls on this website. If, God forbid, something happens with any of the babies on this board, you will most certainly find strength within yourself that you didn't know you had. I went through it. I mourned, I asked why, I was angry, I was bitter. But I got through it, I learned, I picked myself back up, and my hubby and I are already expecting again. Those girls over there are amazing, and I know they will be back on the first tri boards soon enough.

As for you first-tri girls, try not to dread the "what-ifs" - don't put that kind of stress in your bodies. Just take care of yourselves. Don't go searching for for the "stories" that you don't want to hear because it will only bring unneeded stress to your bodies. Just enjoy your babies!

urbanbaby09 · June 2009

kmtfu:
Speaking from experience, I would highly encourage you to stay busy and stay away from these forums - particulary the loss forums.

This. Adding undue stress is not good for you or the baby. I am one of those who had a missed miscarriage, and all I can say is there is nothing that I could have or have not done to prevent it. There is no sense worrying about what you have no control over, so choose to stay positive instead.

Hopefull11 · June 2009

I worry about it too. My sister had a missed miscarriage. I just try to stay positive. I don't go in untill July 2.

sarajo317 · June 2009

CapitolBaby:

As somebody who had a miscarriage in April, I just want to say that those girls on the miscarriage boards are the strongest girls on this website. If, God forbid, something happens with any of the babies on this board, you will most certainly find strength within yourself that you didn't know you had. I went through it. I mourned, I asked why, I was angry, I was bitter. But I got through it, I learned, I picked myself back up, and my hubby and I are already expecting again. Those girls over there are amazing, and I know they will be back on the first tri boards soon enough.

ahh.. this made me cry! soo true!

mariamaria · June 2009

We are in the same boat. I have my 12+ week appt on the 18th and have a fear that there will no hb. I am trying not to google things now and have been trying to remind myself that all I can do is do what I am told to be healthy and provide the best odds for the baby and if it is healthy, it will be just fine.

I also try to remind myself that it isn't helpful to review forums on the topic. Those people are there for support and if I am ever going through the same thing, I would be there, too. My heart breaks for each and every one of them and I know it increases my worry when I read their stories and it gives me the perception that it's happening to so many people. Sadly, by nature, your mind/eyes are drawn to the sad stories rather than the dozens of other happy ones that we may have overlooked.

Keep thinking positively and we can't wait to hear your update after your appointment when you announce that you heard a perfectly beating hb.

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