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does this sound like ppd or normal new mom stuff?

MrsJoeDirtMrsJoeDirt
in Babies: 0 - 3 Months

My son is a little over 3 mos old.  He's my first (and last) baby.  I'm a SAHM (I got fired from my job while on mat leave for making a mistake on a tax return and my boss not checking it before it was filed, nice huh?)  My husband and I wanted one of us to stay home with him anyway, so I guess things just work out in strange ways.

Here's the thing...I simply cannot let go of my old life.  What I mean is, I can't stop thinking about what it used to be like.  I could go to the store when I wanted, if I wanted to take the dog for a walk I just went, I could shower, put on makeup, get dressed, and anything else pretty much at a whim.  Now I have this baby that will always be here and I find myself getting jealous twinges when I think about people i know that can just do whatever, whenever.

I love my son, I don't want to go back to work, my husband and family are great and I can get a break from being home.  So how come I can't just let go of the way things used to be?  Is this at all normal? 

I talked to my mom and she said it is normal.  But that it will get better with time.  I really want to believe her, but a little part of me keeps thinking "you should be more in love with your baby and not be jealous of people".

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Re: does this sound like ppd or normal new mom stuff?

  • Jackswife123Jackswife123

    I think it sounds like a normal process of adjusting. ?I`m glad you talked to your Mom about it. ?I`d keep discussing it with her. ?I`m sure that`ll help. ?This is such a hard change to make, and I really think it gets easier with time.

    Good luck.?

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  • Snowy_OwlSnowy_Owl

    I think it's both - getting fired is not a happy making event - it's not as if you chose to be a SAHM - it was forced upon maybe before you wanted it.

    I'd talk to a Dr. b/c you do not have to feel this way.

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  • iris427iris427 member

    It's hard to say from this post.  Yes, it's normal to have times when you miss your old life, when you are jealous of the freedom that others without children get to have.  You are not required to love everything about having a baby, any more than a mom of toddlers has to love temper tantrums or a mom of teenagers has to love hormonal outbursts.

    But if it something you are really focusing on and it is interfering with your life and with your ability to enjoy time with your baby, then I think you should talk to your doctor and get evaulated for PPD.

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  • madhatter2003madhatter2003

    Sounds like both. If your DS was 3 weeks I'd say it was just normal new mom/hormones, but at 3 months that's a bit long. But it sounds like you had a lot of things happen all at once...so it could just be adjustment still.

    Talk to your doc, it never hurts to be safe.

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  • KrissytenKrissyten member
    I feel like that from time to time too.  We tried so long to have him and almost started infertility treatment.  I feel guilty for thinking those thoughts.  I love him so much, but I know feeling like that is normal.  Don't worry!
    TTC #1 for 14 months, completed IF w/u and spontaneous BFP
    TTC #2 since summer '10, not preventing since 5/09
    Me: ovulatory dysfunction, Hashimoto's thyroiditis DH: normal
    IUI #1 100mg Clomid + Ovidrel = BFN
    IUI #2 100mg Clomid + Ovidrel = BFN
    IUI #3 100mg Clomid + Ovidrel = BFN
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    IUI #4 Gonal-F 75 units + Ovidrel = BFP!!!
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  • CosmogrrlCosmogrrl

    I think it's normal... I thought I had ppd or prolonged baby blues as well, and after speaking to a therapist, I realize what I am feeling is okay.

    Also, I apparently am very sensitive to hormonal shifts in my body (like, I can't take BC because they all seem to make me loopy), so the fact that I'm BFing really takes a toll on me and my hormones. So I have started giving a bit of formula (approx 3 times a day) and this levels things out a bit more and gives me some "me time". 

    How are you sleeping at night? My doctor explained sleep cycles to me. A sleep cycle is 90 mins, and you have to make sure that you get 2 consecutive cycles to be refreshed or re-energized. Anything less than that, is hardly worth sleeping at all (in terms of being refreshed). Hopefully you have alot of help and support :)

    GL, things will get better!

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  • christie.hchristie.h
    I think it's normal. When you were pregnant you were still an individual. In one day of giving birth you gave up your own individuality and promised to be unselfish and caring and always put this little person first and answer to their every whim. It takes a lot of adjusting when you realize just how much time/effort they require. I feel the same way you do sometimes, and I don't think it makes us love our babies any less.
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