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With your help, I survived a really yucky day. Thanks!

joyfulnaturejoyfulnature
in TTC after 35

Hello, Boardmates! And a big thanks to all of you. With your support, I made it through yesterday. It wasn't easy!

First, as you know, there was AF's sneaky arrival, just when I thought she wasn't coming, at the end of Cycle 6.

Then, I talked to a friend I hadn't talked to in awhile. I told her about TTC and RE, and immediately after, she tells me about a friend of hers who I've met. Friend is our age, and absolutely, vehemently did not want children. You guessed it: She got pregnant by accident. She was less than thrilled, but now, 6 months in, has adjusted to the idea. I'm not mad at my friend - she's never been TTC and just didn't get that this story would make me sad/peeved at the universe.

Oh, and here's a warning: I bought Father's Day cards while at the grocery yesterday. Never occured to me that it would get to me. But I was tearing up in the card aisle.

But today is a new day. And TTC wise, I'm focusing on my upcoming RE visit. And the tons of paperwork I have to do ahead of time.

Everyone says it, but it's worth repeating: I don't know what I'd do without the support all of you provide. Thanks for being here.

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Re: With your help, I survived a really yucky day. Thanks!

  • QE2QE2 member
    Oh, Joyful, I'm sorry you had such a rough day yesterday, but I'm glad you made it through. Our emotions always sneak up on us when we least expect it. I never know how I'm going to react in certain situations. I always think I'll be strong, but end up falling apart. I'm glad you're focusing on the future, that's what I do too. Upcoming appointments or plans for second opinions always give me a proactive, moving in a forward direction feeling. What also helps me is the thought of vacationing in your cabin in the mountains ;)
    TTC since 3/08 DOR, High FSH, Hypothyroid, Uterine Polyps, blocked tube, MFI, 5 rounds of clomid, 5 IVF attempts, 2 hysteroscopies, 2 natural conceptions=2 losses (Methotrexate, D&C) Successful DE cycle twins born 10/7/11 Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • hollymichaelhollymichael
    Oh Joyful, I am sorry you had such a bad day.  I hope today is a much better one for you.  Good luck with the RE.  Even though I can't go yet (insurance reasons), seeing the gyn and starting testing has made me feel better.  I think beeing proactive and having a plan is always a good thing for the mental state!
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  • joyfulnaturejoyfulnature

    imageQE2:
    What also helps me is the thought of vacationing in your cabin in the mountains ;)

    Now that made me smile! Perhaps one of these days, we'll be watching our kids playing in the creek together, talking about the old days when we were trying so hard to make them. It could happen! You're in North Jersey, the cabin is in NE PA. 

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  • joyfulnaturejoyfulnature

    imagehollymichael:
    Oh Joyful, I am sorry you had such a bad day.  I hope today is a much better one for you.  Good luck with the RE.  Even though I can't go yet (insurance reasons), seeing the gyn and starting testing has made me feel better.  I think beeing proactive and having a plan is always a good thing for the mental state!

    Thanks, Holly.  

    I'm looking forward to starting the testing myself. Today, I have to call my insurance company and figure out exactly what they cover and what they don't.  

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  • QE2QE2 member
    imagejoyfulnature:

    imageQE2:
    What also helps me is the thought of vacationing in your cabin in the mountains ;)

    Now that made me smile! Perhaps one of these days, we'll be watching our kids playing in the creek together, talking about the old days when we were trying so hard to make them. It could happen! You're in North Jersey, the cabin is in NE PA.?

    ?

    Haha, I'm looking forward to it. I grew up in north west NJ, about 30 min from the PA border, and spent my summers at nature camp in NJ and camping on the Delaware River. I love the Poconos! I now live in the Ramapo Mountains and hike every day....or I used to now that I can't get break a sweat or get my hear rate above 120. I also have a lot of back and knee issues in which my orthopedist told me to stay off hills and steps. I miss my hikes :( ?Can't wait for our kids to play in the creek together!

    TTC since 3/08 DOR, High FSH, Hypothyroid, Uterine Polyps, blocked tube, MFI, 5 rounds of clomid, 5 IVF attempts, 2 hysteroscopies, 2 natural conceptions=2 losses (Methotrexate, D&C) Successful DE cycle twins born 10/7/11 Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • joyfulnaturejoyfulnature
    imageQE2:
    imagejoyfulnature:

    imageQE2:
    What also helps me is the thought of vacationing in your cabin in the mountains ;)

    Now that made me smile! Perhaps one of these days, we'll be watching our kids playing in the creek together, talking about the old days when we were trying so hard to make them. It could happen! You're in North Jersey, the cabin is in NE PA. 

     

    Haha, I'm looking forward to it. I grew up in north west NJ, about 30 min from the PA border, and spent my summers at nature camp in NJ and camping on the Delaware River. I love the Poconos! I now live in the Ramapo Mountains and hike every day....or I used to now that I can't get break a sweat or get my hear rate above 120. I also have a lot of back and knee issues in which my orthopedist told me to stay off hills and steps. I miss my hikes :(  Can't wait for our kids to play in the creek together!

    We have relatives in Succasunna, NJ.

    The cabin is in the Endless Mountains, north of the Poconos.

    I grew up in the Alleghenies, on the other side of PA, so I'm a mountain girl, too.

    How are you feeling, btw?

     

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  • QE2QE2 member
    I grew up in Long Valley, which is near Succasunna. I'm feeling pretty good. I have some cramping and tons of bloating. It's sad, really, my friends tell me I look pregnant, and I do. At least 8 months along! DH told me he's getting me 2 trainers. I'm restricted to stretchy pants. If I knew how to upload a picture, I would. I'm also battling migraines from all of the hormones, but otherwise I'm doing good. Thanks for asking!
    TTC since 3/08 DOR, High FSH, Hypothyroid, Uterine Polyps, blocked tube, MFI, 5 rounds of clomid, 5 IVF attempts, 2 hysteroscopies, 2 natural conceptions=2 losses (Methotrexate, D&C) Successful DE cycle twins born 10/7/11 Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • shyntrueshyntrue
    I'm sorry you had a bad day!  It does seem to make it a little better when you have people to vent to who know some of what you are going through.  I hope you have a better day today!
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  • joyfulnaturejoyfulnature

    imageQE2:
    I grew up in Long Valley, which is near Succasunna. I'm feeling pretty good. I have some cramping and tons of bloating. It's sad, really, my friends tell me I look pregnant, and I do. At least 8 months along! DH told me he's getting me 2 trainers. I'm restricted to stretchy pants. If I knew how to upload a picture, I would. I'm also battling migraines from all of the hormones, but otherwise I'm doing good. Thanks for asking!

    Sorry about the migraines. Those are so awful. 8 months pregnant, eh? Those are some hormones!

    But you'll have dang good stories to use to guilt your kids into good behavior one day. Not that I'm condoning that parenting method. But hey, it's good to have it, just in case you're ever desperate. Worked for my parents!

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  • joyfulnaturejoyfulnature

    imageshyntrue:
    I'm sorry you had a bad day!  It does seem to make it a little better when you have people to vent to who know some of what you are going through.  I hope you have a better day today!

    Thanks, Shy.  Today is a much better day. And in a few minutes, I'm going out to lunch. YAY!

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  • BrideforKenBrideforKen
    I'm glad your feeling better today! People don't understand how trying TTC really is if they did they wouldn't be so insensitve and tell the most inappropriate stories. Sorry you had to go through that! Hang in there! New cycle = New plan 
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  • LizzyB11LizzyB11
    I am so sorry you had to go through a day like that! Keep focusing on that RE appointment. I truly believe that's what turned things around for DH and I. Take time to do those things for yourself that make you happy or feel better. I am so hopeful for you with this upcoming doctor's visit!
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  • itsmexineitsmexine

    Sorry you had a bad day yesterday too.  But glad today is better. It is amazing how a night of sleep or in my case a few hours of sleep at a time can help make us feel better.

    What is that saying... I just take one day at a time but sometimes they all attack me at once. I think we've all been there.

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  • indianasunshineindianasunshine member

    Joyful,

    So sorry you had a crappy day, and I wasn't here to give you support. ?Glad you're doing better now. I really hope the RE is able to help you get some answers. ?I know that just getting an ounce of control over our situation helped me immensely. ?It's also great to have someone else committed to getting you pregnant!?

    Image by TinyPic Me 43, DH 49 Married November 3, 2007 TTC #1 since November 2007 First RE appointment May 13, HSG 5/17- tubes are clear, SA - very good, FSH 6.8, rubella immunity, saline sonogram 7/2 - uterine polyps, hysteroscopy date FINALLY 9/4! Blood pressure and thyroid are under control! Come on BFP!!!! My Blog IUI#1 1/14 , AF=BFN 1/28, IUI #2 3/9, AF=BFN 3/20 Cycle 20 IVF #1 = BFP!!! Beta #1- 196 Beta #2- 784 Egg retrieval 5/1 - 11 eggs! Update 5/2 - 9 mature, 7 fertilized! Embryo transfer 5/6 - transferred 2 beautiful blasts and have one snowbaby Induction scheduled for 01/11/10 - 38 weeks, 1 day April 3, 2012 FET with snowbaby (identical twins) BFN and a big broken heart Moving on to DE Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker8/2012-Donor chosen! 9/2012-12/2012-Donor passed all testing, off BC pills, waiting to complete 2 full cycles. 12/16/2012-cannot move forward with donor, cycles not regulating. 12/17-New proven donor 1/11- started Lupron on our baby boy's 3rd birthday 
    Egg retrieval 2/27 - 27 eggs, 24 mature, 19 fertilized
    Embryo transfer 3/4 - 2 beautiful, hatching blasts and nothing left to freeze.  Beta #1 461 9dp5dt. Beta #2 1230 11dp5dt.
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