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Babies: 9 - 12 Months
star173
member
I'm feeling so sad- I hurt my grandma's feelings
star173
member
ETA: This is a book- don't feel bad if you don't want to read it!!
My grandma is a very young 74 year old. She has more of a social life than I do. But, she's got some health issues where she gets dizzy often and she has really bad carpel tunnel, so her hands go "numb". Tonight, I called her to complain about my sister (she's just a mess); well, it came up that my sister has prevented my mom from babysitting a couple of times- and my grandma asked me- why do you ask your mom when I live right next door. Sigh..I knew this was coming. I felt so bad, but I had to tell her. I told her I'd feel worried because she loses her balance (and has to grab onto walls sometimes), and she always talks about her hands being numb. I told her I'd be worried that would happen while she was watching K.
She got so upset and said, "Well that's it- I'll never offer to babysit again!!" As if she was taking something from me?? I just feel bad because she helped raise me growing up, and those days are behind her now. It must be hard to realize that. I may have been able to lie to her, but I didn't know what to say. I tried to be as delicate as possible, but I knew it would upset her- even though I'm right, and she should know that she's not in good enough condition to be responsible for an 8 month old. I just feel bad for making her feel bad- and old.
The reason I was calling her is because my mom went shopping with K and I, and my sister kept calling my phone- she wanted my mom to come home to take HER shopping. I mean, I never see my mom and my sister still lives at home. My mom is at her beck and call- so when she called my phone again, I told her that mom was with me and she'd be home when we were done. Then, my sister left me a horrid voicemail calling me stuck up and saying that the world doesn't revolve around me (apparently, it revolves around HER). So, I was all upset and didn't want to get my mom anymore upset over this crap- so, I was telling my grandma about it. She tells me about my sister all the time- I thought she would understand...then the babysitting thing came up.
It gets better, my sister then went to my grandparents house- why- because my mom would only buy her ONE shirt, not two...so my sister left the store and walked to my grandma's house. (probably a 30 minute walk) Talk about a spoiled brat. Oh, she's 18 by the way. My mom allowed her to be like this growing up, and now she's a monster. It's sad.
Okay, sorry for unloading like that. Thanks for listening. And sorry for the "poor me"...this is just a sucky night.
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Re: I'm feeling so sad- I hurt my grandma's feelings
Ugh, yuck, that is a lot to handle in just one evening. I would be feeling really down too.
As far as your grandmother, I think in the long run you did the right thing. It would have kept coming up and at some point you would have had to tell her what the deal was. I'd be willing to bet that part of the reason she was so upset is because she knows you're right and it makes her sad that she's losing some of her functioning as she ages
Give her some time, she may come around!
aw star i'm sorry.
Oh that is so tough! The grandmother thing. My grandmother is in decent health and I get really worried about her dropping O, so I totally get it. She has vertigo and some other issues and I just worry. I would never be able to leave her with him. It is sad, but true. If something ever happened to our babies in their care, they would never recover from it. And of course, neither would we.
As for your sister....jeez. Not even sure what to say to that. Is she going to college? The real world is going to be interesting for her.
Hang in there!
That totally sucks. I can see why your grandma would be upset, but I can also see why you'd be worried. I'm more worried about the dizzy spells though. Has your Grandma had this checked out? There might be some simple medication she can take to help with this.
And your sister sounds like a gem. My SIL can be way stuck up and spoiled so I sympathize. I would tell her to STFU.
Ugh. I'm sorry you have to deal with all of this. That is so frustrating.