I Fvcking hate this economy!

CMM05 · June 2009

Hi Girls-

I just need to vent. Three years ago, my DH decided he wanted to go to Law school. We sacrificed A LOT for him to do this, one including selling our first home and moving in with my mother for the duration of Law school. Although we all get along, it has been a struggle to say the least. I am a teacher who has not received more than a 1% raise (yes....ONE....) over the past four years. Next year when we negotiate our contract, they have told us to expect NO raise unless we want to pay more for health care.

My DH worked VERY hard in Law School and finished FOURTH in his class. Pretty much the only people who got jobs were people who finished in the top 10 of the class. He got a job with an amazing large, corporate Law firm. They laid off 20 people a couple weeks ago, but assured my DH he was "fine." I was leary.....he was optimistic.

I finally felt that after not having a life for three years and giving up so much, that there was a light at the end of the tunnel. He was slated to start working in September.

Last night we got the call He has now been deferred until January 2010. I am devastated. Yes, he still has the job......but there are no guarantees. We have another baby on the way and we will now be living with my mo for at least another year.

I am so devastated and stressed. We can't even fit two cribs in my DS's room (the rooms are small......). I feel like my life has been on hold for so long and its never going to go anywhere. How are we ever going to get somewhere if we can't find jobs? I don't understand how our generation is supposed to "make" it. Pretty much all of our savings (the little we did have.....) has gone to bills and/or other living expenses. The money I do make only helps us get by......its not enough for savings.

I'm so stressed and know that its not his fault, but I feel so trapped. So many of my friends and/or their DH's have lost their jobs.......

Thanks for "listening."

TakYelgif · June 2009

I am so sorry the economy right now is aweful DH got the same talk about raises next year. He does have a job but won't get getting anything paywise next year.

Is it possible for y'all to move out of state?

A lot of law firms and the dept of Justice is looking for employees in the DC metro area. Govt is actually hiring right now due to the fact that so many people are taking early out retirment packages.

CMM05 · June 2009

TakYelgif:

I am so sorry the economy right now is aweful DH got the same talk about raises next year. He does have a job but won't get getting anything paywise next year.

Is it possible for y'all to move out of state?

A lot of law firms and the dept of Justice is looking for employees in the DC metro area. Govt is actually hiring right now due to the fact that so many people are taking early out retirment packages.

We have discussed moving out of state.....I personally think its our only option. The problem is that Bar exam is only administered in July and February. He is obviously studying for the Michigan July Bar right now. So, if he were to look for out-of-state jobs he wouldn't be able to do anything until next winter/spring b/c he wouldn't be able to take another Bar exam until next February. It just really sucks either way.....

Even though our family is all here (and my job.....), I really wanted him to look out of state last year, but he liked the firms here

JGirl2005 · June 2009

I'm so sorry. We were going to buy a new house, but with the economy as it is - we may have to stay in our existing one. I know you are in a worse state with living with your MOM. I love my mom but that would drive me crazy too.

I hope you get positive news about his job or yours. When you say he has been deferred does that mean he only has a job until january (if that)?

This economy sucks.

TakYelgif · June 2009

CMM05:
TakYelgif:

I am so sorry the economy right now is aweful DH got the same talk about raises next year. He does have a job but won't get getting anything paywise next year.

Is it possible for y'all to move out of state?

A lot of law firms and the dept of Justice is looking for employees in the DC metro area. Govt is actually hiring right now due to the fact that so many people are taking early out retirment packages.

We have discussed moving out of state.....I personally think its our only option. The problem is that Bar exam is only administered in July and February. He is obviously studying for the Michigan July Bar right now. So, if he were to look for out-of-state jobs he wouldn't be able to do anything until next winter/spring b/c he wouldn't be able to take another Bar exam until next February. It just really sucks either way.....

Even though our family is all here (and my job.....), I really wanted him to look out of state last year, but he liked the firms here

Can he take the bar exam for NOVA, instead of Michigan?

I don't get how all this works but I am guessing is a state by state thing and I think if you work for the federal govt ie; dept of justice you don't need to take the bar exam for washington DC. You just have to have passed the bar, I could be wrong about that though.

jsusann · June 2009

FVCK! I hate it too! I am so sorry you have to go thru such a struggle. And know that you are not alone. It sucks so bad, I literally take deep breaths everyday to try not to allow myself to go into a depression state. I have to keep reminding myself how lucky I am to have a roof over our head and the ability to stay home with the kids. Although, with three we couldn't afford a daycare situation anyway. We sold our house last August and moved into an apartment when I was 3 months pregnant w/twins. We also have Lilly who is almost 3yrs. Well, we thought we would have our next house by the time the babies were born. We are in a 2 bedroom apartment right now. And of course as the winter came, less houses in our price range were on the market. Babies are born in Feb and we are all cramped into this tiny space...there is baby paraphenalia everywhere, we have a dog and a cat..and I'm CONSTANTLY stepping on toys or animals. Now my husbands job is beginning to sh*t the bed. In a nutshell..he HATES it and is nervous that soon he'll be let go anyway b/c layoffs are on the horizon. He is in high tech sales and nobody is buying right now (big surprise). So we are faced with either a layoff or him leaving his company and going elsewhere....both which leave us unable to buy our next house until the bank would approve a mortgage. If he starts a new job or loses his job, there won't be any mortgage approval anytime soon! It sucks and neither of us see a way out of this situation. As much as we wanted to sell our old house (it was on a busy street and we want our next house in a quiet neighborhood) I secretly wish we were still there b/c it was a good size and we would have a normal life. So I can feel your pain. It's hard b/c I don't want to vent to my husband, it's the last thing he needs. I just keep telling him that we will make it through...we'll be okay...don't worry...you're doing a great job as a husband and dad. He takes on so much stress. So I stress alone most of the time. It's nice to have an outlet like this board.

trinny · June 2009

This economy does suck. I was laid off at 36w, and got no maternity leave with a company I had worked for over 8 years. I hate it.

macschic · June 2009

I can sort of relate. DH went back to school (for teaching) a few years ago and recently graduated. While he was in school we had to live completely off my salary. He is searching for a position for the fall. We live in a small townhome and I have felt like our taking the next step to a bigger home has been put on hold until he finds something. It is quite stressful and although it is not his fault, I sometimes get pissed about it. Added onto all that stress I am starting a PhD program in the fall so my "salary" will drop dramatically. ::Hugs::

MrsACT1 · June 2009

I know exactly how you feel, my DH just graduated law school, he was a teacher during the day and went to school at night because we couldn't make it on just one salary. Well now he has graduated and there are no jobs.....so he is teaching again next year unless something changes. The bad thing is all the student loans he took out for his undergrad, masters and law school come due this summer...and we don't have the extra income to cover the loans and the day care for our little one on his teacher salary....and we are having a hard time trying to get his loans consolidated....this economy is horrible, but I am holding on to faith that it will get better. He has applied for forbearance on his loans so he can take the bar this summer and hopefully find a job after the first of the year...it will give us a little bit of room....he is also looking for a new teaching job with coaching or looking at teach some night classes at a jr. college to help bring in some extra money. So I know how hard this time can be and I feel your frustration.

TheSkimmy · June 2009

I'm so sorry. I understand your frustration. DS has taken a 10% pay cut, 2 weeks unpaid vacation and was told to expect another 2 weeks unpaid in Dec. He is also not allowed to carry over vacation time anymore (no biggie) With all the cuts his company has been taking we are lucky he has a job. Everyday I feel like an idiot that I quit my job here in Detroit to stay home last year... but how would I have known?

Hugs!! I'm always here if you want to talk or eat a cupcake.

alchris · June 2009

I am so so sorry! You're right, FOURTH in his class is awesome! DH is a public defender and being employed by the state means lower pay, fewer raises, etc. (all state employees got a mandatory 10 hour furlough this summer), but for better or worse there's job security as crime hasn't taken a break, and if anything they've expanded their office in the last year or two. I know you guys have made a lot of sacrifices and I know you're ready to move out so I really hate it for you, especially with this timing. There are temproary law jobs out there -- they usually won't pay health insurance but they are something. DH worked for an insurance defense company for the first 6 months after he passed the bar after law school and he loved the people there even though the work wasn't what he wanted to do long-term. And I imagine that with the economy there are more of those temporary law jobs available as practices don't want to commit for long-term. Come to think of it, my sister had a temporary law job in Seattle a couple years ago as well, supervising interns at her former law school. I'm just so sorry. Best wishes to you!!!

EverAfterinMi · June 2009

omg Carly. I am so sorry.

You know i understand having been laid off in this sh!tass town myself and seeing my DH hang on to his job by a thread like the rest of the auto industry. I agree.. how is our generation supposed to make it? This recession is completely elminating the middle class. You're either rich and don't care or you're poor and can get food stamps, day care assistance, housing assistance. Not that the poor don't struggle, of course. And maybe because this is where we are right now too.. struggling to pay the bills for living expenses. What frustrates me the most is if we were in this position last year or the year before, I wouldn't have three babies to support. I hate being in this position with them to think about. I don't care if I don't eat for awhile, but them...

anyway.. you're welcome to come over anytime and hang out with my unemployed butt this summer.

hugs!

schmoodle · June 2009

I'm so sorry - it's such a scary time right now, especially at large law firms where there's so much uncertainty and layoffs daily. I know those extra few months are going to be tough. I'm glad at least he was deferred only until January 2010 rather than until 2011 like many firms are doing. (((HUGS)))

GypsyEsq · June 2009

I'm sorry, this is a real blow to you guys. To have done so well in school and then this. Deferral sucks and of course it could change (which I know you know) but January 2010 is a lot better than 2011. Are there possibilities for public interest placements in the meantime, is the firm offering any kind of benefit during the deferral period? I know some are offering to cover health insurance at least. If he hasn't already he should get back in contact with his career services department at the law school and see what they recommend -- at the very least to just make sure the information is recorded and the law school knows what to tell next years rising 3Ls.

For now best of luck on getting through this tough bar study time period, I honestly don't know how DH put up with me during that time but I'm glad he did. Of course now we're learning a whole new way to deal with eachother since I've been laid off since January from BigLaw. Hang in there.

marriedgirl05 · June 2009

I don't even know what to say. I am so sorry and sending you so many hugs and prayers. This just totally sucks.

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