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Two Under 2
what are your biggest worries?
for those who do not have 2 under 2. maybe those who have it already can make you not so nervous?
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Re: what are your biggest worries?
That 1 baby is so easy. 2 seems SO hard.
That it took me several months to adjust to having a baby, will it be that hard a second time?
That a baby under 2 still seems so needy, how can you give them both what they need without feeling one is being shafted and also while keeping your sanity?
Will #1 be too young to understand and will she feel slighted by another baby?
That it took me several months to adjust to having a baby, will it be that hard a second time? nah, you were adjusting to being a parent - now you just need to adjust how things work with an extra body. just stick to a routine... and add another person to it. then you are keeping things normal for the 1st born while bringing the 2nd one into what already has been working, kwim?
That a baby under 2 still seems so needy, how can you give them both what they need without feeling one is being shafted and also while keeping your sanity? and that may be true, but a great piece of advice i heard was make sure you fulfill everything the older 1 needs first, then tend to the baby. - in the sense that if they were both crying - pick up the older one first. that child understands the concept of "mom didnt choose me first" - as the baby does not. then pick the baby up 2 seconds later. and the easiest thing to do is to incorporate the oldest into your life with the youngest. make her your helper! my dd1 thinks dd2 is just the coolest - and she will help no matter what. she was never jealous bc i made time for her when dd2 napped or when dd2 went to bed to show her "see we still have us time".
Will #1 be too young to understand and will she feel slighted by another baby? eh its possible. just incorporate her into the process and she will not remember a time without the new baby.
Thanks! Great point about tending to the older one first!
What about sleeping? What if you can't get them on the same schedule? I hate being sleep deprived, as do most, I assume...
well, i dunno. i go out in the mornings to the gym bc then they are both tired when we get home and take naps at the same time. it just happened to work out that way. does your DD sttn now? if not - she will by then, then you are only worrying about the baby.
You seem like a super cool, chill mom. I try to be, but I worry that having 2, 3 or 4 kids might turn me into a spazz!
DD STTN when she wants to
Sometimes 7:30 -4 or 5 am, somtimes 7:30pm-7 am.
well, she'll be fine by the time the baby comes im sure.
my dd2 still doesn't sttn all the time, but eh, she will - so until then, whatever.
and im only super chill bc my kids have made me that way. there is no need to stress about things with kids. they do what they want, when they want - so why fight it?
Sleeping! DS still doesn't STTN. However, he was a super sleeper until 3 months so maybe the new baby will give me a break.
Breastfeeding #2. I'm hoping to master feeding in my Moby- can larger (size D) breasted women pull this off??
Imagining another child that is NOT DS. I can't get my brain around this one. I feel like it's going to play second fiddle
I worry about changes in DS's easy-going temperament. He is such a mellow kid, I don't expect him to have a hard adjustment. But people do like to tell me about how #1 changed in a bad way and never went back to "normal".
Also, like the pp said, DS1 has been so easy. I worry that DS2 will be "that second child" everyone likes to tell me about.
Thanks for posting this!
Mama Jan's Kitchen... a food blog
Sleeping! DS still doesn't STTN. However, he was a super sleeper until 3 months so maybe the new baby will give me a break.
Breastfeeding #2. I'm hoping to master feeding in my Moby- can larger (size D) breasted women pull this off??
Imagining another child that is NOT DS. I can't get my brain around this one. I feel like it's going to play second fiddle :(
well, youll figure out sleeping bc, well, you have to, kwim? if youre tired - life gives you a second wind bc you have 2 kids. you just dont seem as tired as you do the first time bc you can't LOL you just have to get through it.
i dont know the answer to your second question - but i hope someone comes to answer!!
and 3 - its just different. you will always have that special connection with your first, but number 2 is just different and you love them for them. they dont play second fiddle bc there are 100 things that they do that maybe dc1 didnt do - or did differently, kwim? i could not imagine what another kid would be like - everything i thought about brought me back to dd1, but then sawyer was a whole other person and it came easy.
tell "everyone" to screw off - bc that is not the case for everyone. dd1 was so so so easy and although dd2 was different - its not harder really - just a different adjustment.
and i have never felt as if #1 changed in a bad way. she actually became 100x more compassionate and loving (to other kids) than she was before. she went from the bully of the gym childcare to the girl that sees someone who is sad and wants to give them a hug. so tell those people to screw off too LOL
#2- It can be done!
It takes time, patience and practice. Good Luck-
I have a couple of worries. How am I going to get ready in the morning with having to nurse one and care for the other? What if I need someone to watch them for the day (this has happened with DS #1)-- will family still be willing to take a toddler and an infant for the day?
well you might need to wake the baby up 30 mins before your 1st child usually wakes up so you have quiet time with the second and can nurse w/o distractions. you also should plan on waking up before they do so you can get ready for the day without having to worry about 2 kids.
and i never had a prob with people watching them... but i dont know your family/friends.
I love this thread! Thanks for posting this Punk
My main concerns are pretty much everyone else's -- How will I find time for TWO? Will first baby feel shafted? How will it be financially for us and how can I make it less of a financial burden? Will it be easy to put them on the same or similiar schedule? Is it easier the younger DS is or should I wait till he's a little bit older?
I'm not PG yet but we are considering trying when he turn 1 1/2 years
I had better luck nursing my daughter in a ring sling for some reason. I have a friend that nurses her daughter in her Ergo. I'm in AWE. You can definitely pull it off, you'll just have to practice.