Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss
DavezWife
member
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I hate this board.
DavezWife
member
I fecking hate that it is here, I hate that we need it, I hate that I can't stop crying, I hate that I lost another baby, and I hate that I'm too scared to have another yet too scared not to try.
I just hate that we all know all bad this hurts.
(obviously I'm in the "bitter angry stage"... lol....)
Join us - Commit Random Acts of Kindness, and say
"I did it for Cricket"
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Re: I hate this board.
...and rather than make another morbid post... I'll just rant about something on this one..
I'm close with my Gram, but let's face it, she's 85. I finally got the balls up to call and tell her we lost the baby, and got THEE stupidest comments ever. I KNOW she's old, and doesn't know what to say... blah blah blah... but I can't help but just drop my jaw in awe...
"Well, it's good it happened now, and not at 9 months."
(um, no, it's NOT good, and when is it ever a good time to loose a baby?)
and
"Are you sure it's not something you could have avoided?"
(believe me, I've tried to take the blame, Oh how I have tried)
and my all time favorite...
"This is just something you're going to have to get over."
(what, just keep reciting '7th time's a charm?")
Uuuuuugggghhhh.
My mom asked me if me using the screwdriver and hammer made me have a miscarriage. What??? Seriously?
I thought I would add to your rant
Then she told me it's too bad I didn't have kids a few years ago.
Don't unhelpful people SUCK?
My boss told me that a chemical pregnancy wasn't really a pregnancy. I have the test, the miscarriage cramps and the deep, heart wrenching feelings that say otherwise.
My mother-in-law told me that that's why you shouldn't test that early. Is a loss you don't know officially about not still the loss of a child? I knew I was pregnant, just knew it from 4 dpo...I had just convinced myself it was all in my head until I saw that faint line.
People are stupid and you don't understand until it happens to you. I actually avoided a friend so I wouldn't say anything like this to her when she had her first miscarriage. Now she and I are both sharing the same thing together, early miscarriages only a week apart.
Unhelpful people do suck.
I hear you- I was traveling with my friend for a girls trip when I had my m/c- since then she has told me I was lucky it happened so early and it was so "interesting" because I was "so emotional" about it when it happens all the time. This from a girl who's never been pregs.
I know I am bitter, but I think I will be taking a break from communicating with her for a while.
Oh ladies, the idiotic people we have to put up with....
Aside from the other common insensitive statements other people have said to me, ("It was God's plan.", "Something was probably wrong with it", etc) the teacher I work with made the worst comment of all:
" You should be glad this happened because now maybe your husband will appreciate you more. Wouldn't you rather have your husband be more thankful than to have a baby?"
I honestly didn't know how to reply...
I am so sorry for your losses, sweetie. I'm sure we all hate this board, and wish we never had to be part of it. I know I do. But I am very glad to have such supportive ladies through this time.