3rd Trimester

Anyone else not really wanting people at the hospital?

I know there really isn't anything I can do about it, but I would just rather the family come once we are home rather than the whole "in the waiting room while I'm giving birth"scenario. ?I can't quite put my finger on why I feel this way, but I do.
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Re: Anyone else not really wanting people at the hospital?

  • I'm only planning to call my mom when I'll go into labor. I already made it clear that I don't want anyone besides my mom in the waiting room. We are calling DH's family few hours after she's born.
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  • This is something that has just started to bother me recently too. I'm kind of worried that we'll be bombarded after she's born, and I'd really like the first hour to be just DH, me, and the baby.
  • I freaks me out to think that people would be waiting for me to finally deliver... just mobs of people out there waiting and thinking, "What is taking so long!?"

    I hope that everyone stays home until we are ready to see them.

  • Sorta... But knowing I would never ever be able to stop my mom and dad (first grandchild) my sister (obviously her 1st nephew) and my grandmothers (first great grandchild), I just let it go and got used the fact I will have a crowd there!
  • I feel the same way. I don't want anyone in the waiting room, it stresses me out just thinking there will be some group of people sitting there waiting. And wondering when it will be done, and when they can come in, and constantly asking how it's going- and trying to come in before we're ready.

    I have made it clear to everyone that DH and I want 1 hour alone with the baby after he's born, so there's no reason for anyone to come to the hospital and wait. We plan on calling my parents when we are admitted to the hospital as it will take a day for them to drive up and we'll let his parents know when we are going and tell them we'll call when they can come.

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  • t&dmt&dm member
    yes, I feel that way too.  I have really been thinking about this a lot lately.  I don't like 90% of my in-laws so I really don't want them there. ESPECIALLY DH sister!!!!
  • We had no one there except my in laws at DS's birth... The only visitors after he was born was very close family and that was real nice since I was recovering from a Csection.
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  • it will probably be DH and i to start and then my mom maybe if ?I am having trouble with the pain . We want to do this on our own. I have a dad who is a doctor and sister who is a nurse so theres no stopping them but i will let everyone visit once i am recovered a little.
  • I can't stand the idea of family lurking in the hospital waiting room.  They can be just as excited and involved waiting in the comfort of their own home. And I won't have to worry about having to please them and having guests before I'm ready.

    Fortunately, I've been pigeon-holed by SIL as the family b!tch. Usually, it annoys me, but there are times I welcome the freedom it brings.

     

  • I'm the opposite - sort of - I don't want a mob of people in the waiting room, but I REALLY don't want  mob of people waiting at our house when we get home. When we go home, I want it to be just me, DH and the baby for the first 24 hours.  I have family driving in from 2 hours away though so I don't know how realistic of a plan this will be. I'm sure my sister will want/need to spend the night. 
  • People won't be at the hospital unless I have to stay longer than the required 24/hours. I think its perfectly okay for us to want one day together as a family before everyone wants to pass our traumatized and exhausted baby around.
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  • Jules GJules G member
    I agree 100% with you, but I know that there's nothing I can do about it...I wish I could though!?
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  • I'm only permitting my mom to come in for the delivery if she is up to it. I don't want other family members lurking in the waiting room for hours and expect to see the baby immediately. I want to get myself cleaned up first and do my hair before MIL comes in with her camera that she uses EVERY DANG TIME WE SEE HER.
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  • Oh you can do something about it, you don't tell people when you go into labor haha :)

    ?Only my mother and father came, they drove 8 hours. we have no other super close family. MIL is here now, moved back last year and she will be watching DD so luckily that won't be an issue (instead I get to come home to our very small house filled with her, her french summer 15 yo who is staying with her (girl) and my parents. TOO CROWDED. I am going to have DH kick everyone out.?

  • Ever since we announced we were expecting I keep hearing about how members want to be there.  My side is my parents, my aunt, counsin, and maybe my sister.  DH's side is his parents, 2 siblings, aunt, uncle, MIL best friends (2 of them).  I have expressed that I think it is too much but DH and MIL are too excited.  I have told my MIL that other than them I do NOT want guests coming to the hospital or to my house for a few days after I get home.  I am not entertaning in the hospital and the rooms are small.  MIL seems to understand that and DH says he is on board so I guess we shall see.
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  • My mom will be in the delivery room with us.  Everyone else in the immediate family will be in the waiting room.  My third cousins are saying they're all coming to the hospital, so I'm really hoping they don't find out I'm in labor until after the baby is here. 
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  • imagekwhiting4:
    I'm the opposite - sort of - I don't want a mob of people in the waiting room, but I REALLY don't want? mob of people waiting at our house when we get home. When we go home, I want it to be just me, DH and the baby for the first 24 hours.? I have family driving in from 2 hours away though so I don't know how realistic of a plan this will be. I'm sure my sister will want/need to spend the night.?

    Hmmm...yeah, don't want them at the house either. ?Let's see...can I just invite them all to the first birthday party? ?;)?

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  • ccmmkkccmmkk member
    i don't have the choice. because of the swine flu scare, the hospital that i will be delivering at only lets you have one support person (dh) and then 1 visitor after (will be my sister) i wanted to have people at the hospital because that way when we get home, i'll have more peace and quiet and they won't be invading the house while we are trying to get settled in.
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  • Totally agree - who knows what's going to happen - I don't want people sitting there waiting for me, or worrying if something doesn't go as planned.  And I also don't want to be sitting in the room by myself while my husband feels the need to entertain people who are waiting.  I want 100% of my attention and my husband's attention focused on our baby and the delivery. 

     I think we'll have visitors at the hospital, which is ok with me - AFTER the fact, and at a decent hour.  =)

  • And this is why I'm glad that we live at least eight hours from our families.  We will call my parents and DH's parents when we go to the hospital and DH is tasked with calling them occassionally to keep them updated, and with the final stats.  But it will only be he and I at the hospital, and then my mom will come down a week later when DH goes back to work.  And I thank my lucky stars that I don't have to worry about this.
  • Oh I completely understand.  I would prefer some peace and quite after birth before visitors start coming in.  But, I know that's not going to happen.  I am putting my foot down and most of them know that I don't want visitors during labor and after birth the first visitor will be my dd.  I guess after the four of us have our time I will let them start coming in.
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