Would you be a surrogate?

Blackvelvet · May 2009

I keep seeing adds for being a surrogate. They pay your medical bills and you get $18,000 when you hand over the baby. $24,000 the second time you are willing to do it. I don't think that is even close to enough for all the pain and sickness of pregnancy.

Smellygirl · May 2009

Nope - not for a stranger. I would do it for my sister (who had a hard time getting pregnant, but eventually did and now has a beautiful little boy).

Deirdre18 · May 2009

I would never ever, ever do it not even for millions of dollars.

emclarenicks · May 2009

If there was no labor, it wouldn't be that bad for me if my pregnancy was the same each time. I don't know if I could carry a baby and give it to someone else though!

MissTGH · May 2009

I agree i wouldnt be a surrogate only because of everything I have had to deal with in this pregnancy but some women have wonderful pregnancies so I can see why some people do it but its not for me...

theweathermanswife · May 2009

No way I could do it. I couldn't do it for anyone other than my sister. This has been such an incredibly emotional experience and I can't imagine carrying a baby and then having to hand him/her over to someone else, especially a stranger - for any amount of money.

Mike&Care · May 2009

I can't see myself ever doing that. Not unless someone like Sarah Jessica Parker comes knocking on my door with a HUGE check, lol.

My pregnancy has been really easy, but it still takes a toll on my body. I am tired and soo ready to have my baby at the end of all this.

sabrina69barnes · May 2009

No. I was adopted and have been reunited with my natural mother. She has decribed how painful it was to give me up. The difference between her and a surrogate is that she didn't plan to get pregnant and didn't get paid to give me to someone else, but I would imagine the pain to be very similar.

trinise · May 2009

it would have to supplement my salary!!

HeyyRed · May 2009

Hell no. I thought I could do it before I got pregnant but no friggin' way.

robbie3982 · May 2009

I would, but only for a family member or very good friend.

Jen&Joe06 · May 2009

I would only be a surrogate for my sister or my brothers wife and only after I was done having kids.

Kendall13 · May 2009

Deirdre18:
I would never ever, ever do it not even for millions of dollars.

This. I hate being pregnant for my own children. I've seen a few Baby Stories where sisters had children for their gay brothers. I think that it's such an amazing gift, but I don't think that I'm cut out for this.

CalinsBride · May 2009

I think that if I was one of those women who enjoyed being pregnant, sure I would.

heidismith · May 2009

I would only do it for my sisters if they werent able to have kids, but it would be after I was done having children.

schmoodle · May 2009

Possibly, if pregnancy weren't so high risk for me and the baby. But as it stands, the benefits of doing it even for our own children barely outweigh the risks.

ETA: I mean the benefits of being pregnant and carrying my own biological child rather than pursuing other options such as using a surrogate (as opposed to being one), not the benefits of having children altogether. Those obviously FAR outweigh any risk.

ForForever · May 2009

I'd consider it, but I think DH is only willing to put up with me being pregnant while carrying his child.

jerseysunrays · May 2009

We are very close friends with several gay male couples. If any of them asked, I would carry their child in a heartbeat.

I know I couldn't do it for a stranger.

MandaJo9 · May 2009

I would love to do it but there is no way I could give up a baby, even if it wasn't my egg or my dh's sperm, after carrying it for 9 months. It would be an amazing gift to give to someone, I just couldn't part with the LO.

allison_oaks · May 2009

I don't think I could do it, but I commend those that do!

margeincharge2 · May 2009

I don't think I could do it either but I love the idea of surrogacy.

My brother's girlfriend has been a surrogate 5 times to strangers. She loves being pregnant and has developed relationships with the families that she helped have a child. I think it is a beautiful thing to do for someone. I know she gets compensated for it, which one could argue takes away from the "gift" aspect. But, even though it is a service, it's helping out a couple that would otherwise not be able to have their own child.

Hearing from her experiences, I would definitely have my own attorney and be very specific about what I would want/expect. Just one example is that she said her first time she didn't have any clause about multiples and so they put in 3 embryos during the in vitro. She ended up giving birth to twins but she didn't think ahead to add extra compensation for the extra complications of carrying twins, even though it was more taxing on her than carrying one baby. Since that one, she has had a one embryo policy. So no more multiples.

Like I said, I could never do it, but knowing what she has gone through, I know there are a lot more legal ramifications of it than I ever thought of.

MrsWanee · May 2009

never. too hard to give up. plenty of great kids need adopting

pechezncreme06 · May 2009

no I wouldn't. No matter how much money they paid me. Not only is it a whole lot of stress and discomfort in someone else's place but what about the connection you feel to the child that has been living inside of you for all that time? I'd probably want to keep it.

rae76 · May 2009

No. I'm not even sure I will do this again for us to have a second child, but I'm sure I'll change my mind on that one. The only way I would consider being a surrogate is for my sister.