I was thinking about this earlier... my husband seems to have hardly any concept of "the real world", and for the past 6 years (we've been married for nearly two) I've been trying to teach him the ways of being an adult. He didn't know what a cheque even looked like before I showed him how to write one out.
Even with him being the only one working for the past year, I'm still the one who pays all of the bills... with his money, lol.
He still thinks buying video games is more important than the essentials sometimes, and will pout if I say Sammy needs more diapers or whatever. Good lord! My training is slow, but he's getting there. I hope I'm not imagining it, anyway.
Me on the other hand, was taking care of bills for my MOM as far back as I can remember, was my middle sister's babysitter from age 3 (we're two years apart) and never once burned down the house (...my mom nearly did once though...) despite being the one who fed her while my mom went off to do whatever she did. I was basically born to be a mother, and sometimes I think my husband takes advantage of that, and is a little jealous of Sammy, yikes! Sibling rivalry at its weirdest.
Does anyone else have these sort of problems? I hope so, I don't like being alone in this strange land of dumb husbandry.
FWIW, he is doing better by leaps and bounds than he was when he first came to live with me (or ran away from home, depending how you look at it) so you can just imagine what I had to start with!
Re: Who was more sheltered, you or your SO?
Wow. I honestly cant imagine not knowing, as an adult, what a cheque was; or pouting over having to buy diapers. Props for taking on such a...project? You've got to wonder where he'd be if you weren't there.
Luckily DH and I came from very similar backgrounds of being given many real world experiences and being taught many valuable life lessons without the burden of being forced into adult roles as children. Becoming an adult was, for us, a smooth transition.
DH. He is also waaaay more sensitive than me. I don't think I've ever heard his mom utter a cross word in the 10 years I've known her. Seriously, she's extremely passive. So when I get angry at him for my 1 second and then get over it....he's still hurt.
I dont think sheltered is quite the word, as DH is quite the adventurer. His mother, however, never let him figure out any of the important stuff on his own so all DH did his whole life is basically play and fool around while MIL did everything else.
We were in our house for 4 years and married for 3 before she even "let" him get taken off of her car insurance and onto our own policy, and she kept a whole filing cabinet full of paperwork for accounts of his that she finally handed over 2 years ago. Pathetic!
That's why my mom always told me to never ever date a man who still lives with his mother....
DH was more sheltered. Although his parents never really went to church, they raised him in a pretty strict southern baptist type of household where drinking, dancing and having any sort of fun was frowned upon. I remember on our first date he was ready to call it a night at 9 p.m. while I was used to going out until all hours of the morning. It made me feel a tad bit slutty and whorish and I was anything but that.
It took a long time for his family to accept me even though I was also big into church and had strong morals and principles.
So, he's pretty irresponsible with bills and such. He kind of lives with his head in the clouds most of the time which is quite aggravating since I'm a staunch realist. We butt heads quite a bit.
My Etsy Store PIGGY'S PLACE




I think it depends. He was more sheltered when it came to pop culture and I was more sheltered when it came to responsibility.
He said the first movie he remembers seeing at the movie theater was Twister. I was like " Dude, that came out the year we graduated." I couldn't imagine not seeing a movie at the theater till I was a senior in high school. Oh and they hardly ever rented movies or watched TV. His mom was raised very conservative Baptist (almost Duggarish) and thought that movies were of the devil so those kids hardly got to see anything. Everything had to be about the bible, nothing secular. Oh and I don't know if this is considered "sheltered" but they also didn't do the Santa thing because "It detracted from the true meaning of Christmas." Nothing secular was allowed. My goodness he hadn't even heard of "The grinch who stole Christmas" till we were dating. Same thing with music, nothing secular. She also wouldn't let him wear pants that sat at his waist and would make him hike his pants up to be midway between his belly button and his chest. Between that and telling all the kids at school that there wasn't a Santa, I am not surprised when he said he didn't have many friends. Poor hubby
However when it came to responsibility I was more sheltered. He got a job working at his uncle's doughnut shop when he was 13 and was practically working fulltime when he was 16 ( and still going to school). He also paid rent when he still lived at home and he had moved out and got his own apartment when he was 19. I didn't get a job till I was 18 and almost out of high school. My parents didn't make me help out with bills ever and I got to keep all of my money ( I was going to college so that was the deal). I also never lived fully on my own. I went from a roomate to living with him to being married.