Can't I just afford my child? (vent)

Kaytee1087 · May 2009

I'm a young mom (I'm 21, 22 in October) and my fiance is 25. I didn't have health insurance, so since I'm pregnant and legally single mom, I signed up with state Medicaid. People have asked me about my insurance situation and I'm not ashamed of it, it happens, that's what it's there for. What I can't stand is people assuming that I need Welfare and WIC and Food Stamps just because I'm a young "single" mom. They are amazing programs and I'm so glad they are available to people who need them. Example: My cousin has a set of twins and just had another son. She was laid off from Jeep and is a single mom. She needs those programs and I'm glad she can get the help she needs for her and her kids. But I don't need them. Between FI and I, it will be tight, but we can do it. I have people that have seemed almost insulted that I haven't signed up for more state help. I don't understand. Can't I just afford to have my child? Why does young and "single" mean that I need all this other aid? It's driving me crazy! I listen to people's advice and say "It does sound like a great program, I'll look into it" and it's not enough for them. Apparently, I need every single available piece of state help and I didn't even know it. Thank you, world, for pointing this out to me! I'm so glad that you know all about my financial situation and can put me on the road to even more dirty looks. ("Oh she's a single mom AND on welfare...")

We can afford our daughter with our income. Lay off! Angry

abizzzle · May 2009

I know exactly what you mean and it totally gets frustrating!! When I was in the hospital 3 different social workers came in to talk to me about WIC and Husky health insurance (free insurance in CT)!! My income is too high I can't even qualify for those! So annoying..

Everytime I mentioned having to talk to my teachers and not being able to go to my classes due to bedrest, my nurses just assummedddd I meant highschool. Umm no, I'm in college thanks.

People need to take a chill pill and not just jump to conclusions. It is very insulting.

thequeeenbee · May 2009

That is frustrating.

I understand where you are coming from though. I lost my job with benefits the same week that I found out that I was pregnant, and DH's job does not offer benefits (cheeeaaappp company ugh). So, I went on Medicaid, and it has been an amazing blessing, but that does not mean that I am on every other program offered. Everytime I get a call from Job and Family Services to check up and make sure everything is working out with insurance they try and get me to sign up for food stamps... which we make too much money to even consider recieving. There are people who need them, and I would like those services to be saved for them, and I majorly support such programs... so why is everyone pressuring me to be on them???

sam19 · May 2009

My IL's are really wanting me to get foodstamps or something. Of course I may have to do that after getting laid off in my 1st tri (I've been really putting it off). It just seems like people think we aren't going to be able to succeed without getting on these programs. Just smile, say 'thank you' and move on. In the end, their opinions don't matter. You and your FI know where you stand financially and you know when and if you need help.

NewLerma · May 2009

Kaytee1087:
We can afford our daughter with our income. Lay off!

Tell them that, with that face lol!

Kaytee1087 · May 2009

NewLerma:
Kaytee1087:
We can afford our daughter with our income. Lay off!
Tell them that, with that face lol!

I have to say, that made me completely laugh out loud 'cause I'm picturing doing that to my co-worker who's granddaughter is on WIC and thinks it's the best thing ever cause she gets her leftover free milk.

NewLerma · May 2009

I guarantee you'd feel better Angel

kima76 · May 2009

I am on Medicaid as well. I had a wonderful paying job with benefits but I lost it due to lack of sales because of the economy. A lot of us got let go! It was sad.

So needless to say, I found out a few months later that I was pregnant. My FI, DH or whatever.. (we are prettty much married hahha) makes decent money and I will be too when I get off of maternity leave.

I was wondering if you are treated differently in the hospital because of Medicaid? My friends swears that because she was on Medicaid with her 2 babies, she was not given the nice hospital room. She said there where some that looked like mini-apartments but her room looked like a regular hospital room.
Could this be true?? Can they do that??

thequeeenbee · May 2009

kima76:

II was wondering if you are treated differently in the hospital because of Medicaid? My friends swears that because she was on Medicaid with her 2 babies, she was not given the nice hospital room. She said there where some that looked like mini-apartments but her room looked like a regular hospital room.
Could this be true?? Can they do that??

I can't see that. Medicaid gave me Molina healthcare, which I believe you can get without being on medicaid.

kima76 · May 2009

thequeeenbee:
kima76:

II was wondering if you are treated differently in the hospital because of Medicaid? My friends swears that because she was on Medicaid with her 2 babies, she was not given the nice hospital room. She said there where some that looked like mini-apartments but her room looked like a regular hospital room.
Could this be true?? Can they do that??

I can't see that. Medicaid gave me Molina healthcare, which I believe you can get without being on medicaid.

OH, shooo... I have HealthCare USA, I think you can get that without Medicaid as well. I have heard of Molina too!
Seriously, either way the hospital is getting paid, so I don't think it should matter to them.

MissRedEorNot · May 2009

Those special hospital rooms might have required people to pay extra. At my hospital you have to pay $75 per night to have a private room.

LadyNikon · May 2009

My god sister had my god daughter at 15. Her and her BF did have a little money but with you just enough to pay for the baby but not the healthcare. We both grew up on welfare so we knew how much of a trap it is for single mothers especially where I come from. She decided that wasn't for her. She got the healthcare and got a job. Her mother gave her THE BLUES. "You can just sit at home.. and get a check.. blah blah". But we always vowed that we would NEVER get on welfare unless it was absolutely necessary. I have never touched the stuff. She has never touched the stuff and we have became better woman for it. Its for people that NEED it not people who want to make their lives easier. I applaud you for sticking to your guns

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