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Babies: 9 - 12 Months
no cry sleep solution
all I've done is read the book- not put it in practice yet. i'm devising my sleep plan. i have read six other sleep books and have hated them all. either i didn't agree with them, or they didn't tell me what to do. mostly i hated them because they were written by male doctors-- now this one is finally by a mom with loads of experience.
so...any success with this book for any of you? i hope so. i can't take any more sleepless nights!
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Re: no cry sleep solution
My son was a NIGHTMARE sleeper. We read and loved The NCSS.
For me, I found that it helped to just hear someone say "Hey, its okay if your baby isn't getting 12 straight per night, but if you want to change it this is how to do it". We're also full time cosleepers and had NO plans to change that, so we needed something that would work with that and felt compatible.
Honestly, just getting a good routine down that worked for Evan (and not just a totally arbitrary routine that a book gave us, or that we imposed on Evan) - one that really was part of the routine HE was creating for himself...that worked SO well for us.
Aside from the routine, we really used the "sleep word" idea. And we still use it with Evan. We are starting it with Abby as well. As she's drifting off to sleep I'll quietly say "Shhh, night night" over and over. Now when she wakes in the night I can just say "Shh night night" and she rolls over and goes back to sleep. Wouldn't work if baby is a crib sleeper really, but it's awesome for cosleeping babies.
I liked the book. For the same reasons as you - it was written by a mother who'd gone through this. And for me, that it was written by a cosleeping advocate was HUGE for me.
Oh, I just wanted to add - this book was NOT a quick fix. I would say it took a good 6-8 weeks before I really saw permanent change in Evan's sleep habits. So don't rush yourself through it, or assume that after a few days it just isn't working. Be patient, watch baby's cues, and try to work with your baby to find a routine that will help him/her sleep.
I wasn't crazy about it. The ideas seemed good, but they didn't help us much. We really didn't see a change at all after several weeks. And her idea to keep the room a little brighter during the day so the baby distinguished naps from nighttime totally backfired & did nothing but keep her from napping at all!
We also tried Baby Whisperer, which did help our daytime and helped us go from catnaps to 1-1 1/2 hour naps, but also didn't help our night sleep. To the chagrin of many bumpies, we refused to CIO/Ferberize & just didn't feel right about it despite the sleep deprivation. We tried a suggestion by the pedi to go in to the room during nightwakings but pretend we were asleep (to give comfort but not interaction), but that didn't help & just frustrated & exhausted us, so we went back to holding her until she fell back asleep. A week or two later she just suddenly started sttn on her own. She was just shy of 10 months.
Well, IMO - and many people disagree lol - I don't think that ALL sleep associations are bad ones. If the paci helps, let him use it. My son used a paci for a little longer than I had planned, he just lost it a week or so ago at 3yrs old. But I just feel that it's fine to let them have something that makes them feel secure. If a paci makes your baby feel better at night, then let him to it. There's plenty of time yet to get rid of it.
No prob
I know how frustrating sleep issues can get. But hang in there - it WILL get better. Just be gentle, be consistent, and one day you will wake up to find you actually feel rested and have actually gotten some sleep.
I am not sure how old your LO is, but we had a few really bad patches. At 5-6 months, again at 8 months, and then shortly after a year old. Horrible sleep, I had circles under my eyes and was miserable. But we got through it, and now he's a lil lazy butt who loves his sleep!
I agree with this also. My DD still uses her paci, and I still don't put her down awake, and she now sttn. I still fail to see why it is so important to put a baby down to sleep awake. I get that I don't want to have to rock my 5 year old to sleep, but I honestly don't have a problem laying with her or rubbing her back for 2-3 minutes at bedtime at that age, so why do I need to stop that now? I still sit with DD in the glider for about 5 minutes before I lay her down, very drowsy but not unconscious. I don't rock her, but I do hold her, and I have no intentions of giving up the paci or the blankie.
I rocked my big boy to sleep (well not rocked, I would sit on the couch and he'd kinda lay in my lap) until I was too pg with Abby to be able ot pick him up and put him in the bed when he was sleeping.
I have never had a problem with being there to put Evan to sleep. It just was never a "problem" for me, or for DH. When Abby was a needy newborn, Evan often had no choice but to just go to bed on his own. But when we can, we will lay with him even now. It's just not a big deal for us that our kids put themselves to sleep at a young age.
Then one day when I was pg, Evan must have been finding that my lap was shrinking lol, he said "No on Mommy, go sleep in bed". And that was it. We laid in the bed and he went to sleep.
I just think that it's okay to trust our kids to find their way. And they all will, eventually.