2nd Trimester

Is anyone waiting to buy things?

We are not having a shower because we are Jewish and MIL did not have one and doesn't beleive Jewish girls should have showers. 

DH would like to wait until the baby is born to purchase baby things.  I think this is insane because the last thing I want to do when I bring the baby home is have to run around and buy things.  I also think we are going to spend a lot of unnecessary money if we wait and do everything at once when we could be buying it little by little on sale.

That being said... is anyone waiting to buy things or bring things into the house until after the baby arrives?

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Re: Is anyone waiting to buy things?

  • No way!  The last thing I would want to have to do is go shopping for Baby Gwens things after she is here. 
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  • Does your Mom also agree you shouldnt have one.  I have 3 jewish girlfriends who all had showers.  In any case, I would not wait until after, neither of you will want to shop at that point.
  • No.  I can only imagine how busy and tired I will be with a new baby.  I think that is crazy.

    Just wondering, would you have a shower if someone offered or would you turn it down because your MIL says no. 

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  • We're Jewish and still had a shower.  Here's the thing - when our parent's and grandparent's had us - they were kept in the hospital for close to a week which gave dad and grand-dad plenty of time to set up the nursery.  Not the case anymore - you are in and out and you will 100% not want to shop!!!  I get the superstition but it's just not practical IMO. 

    What we did do though is keep everything at my parent's house.  The nursery was set up with the crib and furniture but we didn't wash any clothes except for a few things to bring baby home in until after baby was here and then my mom washed everything. 

  • My DH wanted to wait, too, but I said no. We've outfitted the nursery and basically have all clothing for up to 6 months, and it was all done on sale or via garage sales, eBay and craigslist. We saved so much money doing it this way!
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  • I'm not sure. We are having showers, so we'll see what we get from that. We're due at the end of October, so I'm thinking there may be a few things we can hold off buying and put on our Christmas list instead.
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  • No way! I just can't imagine having to deal with all of that stress right after the baby is born. You would just be making your life harder on yourself.

    Also, I've never heard of this before, all of the jewish girls I know have had baby showers. Why is it that jewish girls are supposed to?

  • i am jewish too and we are waiting to pretty much buy everything. we wil buy some clothes of course, but otherwise just pick the big things and mom and DH will go out when i am in the hospital and bring it all to the house. i think it's less stress on me too
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  • No way!  I don't think there's any reason to wait until AFTER the baby arrives.  You're going to be tired with a newborn keeping you up at all hours, throw in shopping for the baby?...That just sounds stressful.
  • MrsJYMrsJY member
    Our shower will most likely be after the baby is born, but that is the norm here. The only things we're buying before the baby is born are the essentials.
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  • Well you have to buy SOMETHING. Like a carseat and some receiving blankets, diapers, onsies ect to get you through the 1st day or two.
  • I am waiting, but that is only bc of medical problems w/ baby.  I thought I might lose him a few weeks ago, and having to look at his stuff made it that much harder.  Once he is here and healthy, I will set up his nursery, and then we throw a "meet the baby" party.  If people want to bring gifts, great, if not, whatever.  New babies really don't need that much stuff anyway.  I will just buy the necessities and roll with it.

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  • To answer your questions... if someone offered to make me a shower I would not turn it down at all.  Two of my good friends are making me a small luncheon that will be like a shower, but only for about 10 people. 

    My mother is completely clueless... MIL made my bridal shower.  My mother lives thousands of miles from me and never had any of this done for her so she wouldn't assume it should be done for me.

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  • DeepoetDeepoet member

    DH's family is Jewish and so is my Step-Mom, but my Step HATES showers she would not let me have one for my wedding... but thats not the problem. I dont really want a shower because of my own beliefs but I am very jealous of those who are having one and those who have all this cute baby stuff in their homes already. I am not bringing ANYTHING into the house until after my LO comes, but my Step and my Dad will make sure that when I get home from the hospital everything I need and most of what I want will be there waiting for me.

    That being said i really really really want to go shopping for stuff but have been very good and have not done more than look.

  • The truth of the matter is that there are only a few things you *need* when baby arrives. Off the top of my head -- carseat, place for baby to sleep, blankets, clothes (PJs, onesies, hat, mittens), diapers and wipes. We were moving a month after DS was born so we didn't have a nursery set up at all.

    Obviously you need a carseat to bring baby home in. Definitely don't underestimate the amount of time it take to install one -- the first time is a bi#ch unless you have someone help you who has done it. Will you be using a cradle, pack-n-play, bassinet or co-sleeper? You'll need that too. Many don't put their babies in a crib right away, so I wouldn't worry about that too much. Assuming DH is off work and will be able to run out and pick up stuff or you'll have someone around to help, it can be done. Just don't count on doing it yourself because you may not feel up to it. I felt lousy for a couple weeks after my son was born.

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  • We are Jewish as well and my DH's side is somewhat religious and doesnt believe in showers and bringing things into the house.  DH luckily is only half agreeing with them and we did not really do anything till after our big ultrasound...but now he feels more confident and we have bought a few things.  I want to have the nursery set up and he is ok with that, and we are going to have a shower becuase my side is going to throw it.

     I say do what you believe, if you really want to just have the neceissities then maybe DH will compromise on that.  I kept telling mine i'm the one taking carrying the baby so i have a little more say then him!!!!!!  (it wont my battle)

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  • I am only waiting to buy things after my showers. That way I know what I still need to buy on my own. I wouldn't want to wait until the baby is born to buy things. That would be to stressful and after having a baby I wouldn't want to go shopping. Getting the stuff now gives you the chance to relax after having the baby.
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  • imagekristin7701:

    Obviously you need a carseat to bring baby home in. Definitely don't underestimate the amount of time it take to install one -- the first time is a bi#ch unless you have someone help you who has done it. Will you be using a cradle, pack-n-play, bassinet or co-sleeper? You'll need that too. Many don't put their babies in a crib right away, so I wouldn't worry about that too much. Assuming DH is off work and will be able to run out and pick up stuff or you'll have someone around to help, it can be done. Just don't count on doing it yourself because you may not feel up to it. I felt lousy for a couple weeks after my son was born.

    Ahh not a problem for me... DH is a carseat technician trainer!

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  • imageAfterAll:

    Ahh not a problem for me... DH is a carseat technician trainer!

    You're golden. And seriously, if you all feel better getting everything after, it can be done. Half the gadgets and gear you don't even need right away. Plus, someone will be making a million trips out for things you forgot anyway. Stick out tongue

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