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3rd Trimester
BearkatLou
member
Sticky topic and poll: Parenting
BearkatLou
member
What are some things that you see other parents do that you secretly tell yourself you'll never do.
1. Tell my kids to shut up.
2. Call my kids names (even to other people not in the presence of my child).
3. Grabbing LO by the arm and dragging them to submission. I just cringe when I see that.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Sticky topic and poll: Parenting
I'd also like to add ignoring my kids in public.
1. Not discipline my child when they are misbehaving.
2. Forcefully dragging my child away.
Ditto all of these. Also:
-Curse at my child
-Overreact if she falls/bumps into something/etc. I will make sure my kid is okay but I will not encourage her to cry/get upset when she's not really hurt.
I am sure there are more, but this one I have seen a lot lately:
A parent talking to a young teenager as though they were the same age, and then the child talking back because of it...if this makes sense.
Just being simply rude to them, breaks my heart!
Feeding them all the crap that's out there.
Cry it out before age 2.
There are tons more, but you all think I'm crazy enough
Joaquin's hospital and Isela's birth center med & intervention free "hypnobabies" birth stories
No disciplining.
People getting mad at their kids for such minor things. They are kids for cryin out loud.
I will say, before I had DS, there was a lot of stuff that I told myself I would never do. I have changed my mind about a lot of stuff.
<><
Tizzle 10/07 ~ Boppy 7/09 ~ Chicken 1/12
Books read in 2013: ~ Audiobooks listened to in 2013: 3
Currently reading: The Fiery Cross by Diana Gabaldon
Currently listening to: The Dark Divine by Bree Despain
my currently-reading shelf:
GOD YES!!!! This too! It really pisses me off when they ignore their kid and after LO says "mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy" over and over again, the parent screams "WHAT?!?!?" like it wasn't their fault for ignoring LO in the first place. Kills me!
I learned after having DD to never say never.
There are things that I would hate to do and don't want to do but I have found myself doing just that when despiration sets in.
Those are all on my list.
And I'm adding:
1. Never saying "no"
2. Not following through with "no" and punishments
3. Buying my kid M&Ms at the grocery store to get him to stop crying/kicking/etc.
Basically anything my aunt has ever done. She is an awful person. She does everything that everyone has mentioned and much much more!
1. Ignore my child if I am in a "gossip" type of conversation with someone.
2. Disagree with my DH in front of the child about a punishment or reason why they can or cannot do something. I hate the tricks kids pull with putting parents into a battle.
3. Let my kid run around in a dirty diaper when someone tells me he might need to be changed.
1) Drag them by the arm out of a store
2) Call them names
3) Not watch them when they're playing outside (near the street)
4) Be mean to them b/c I'm having a bad day
1. Let me kids bring an entire toybox of toys to church, pour them loudly all over the pew, and them have them climb all over the place like it was a playground. I was raised to respect being at church. I understand maybe bringing something little...but some parents let their kids go nuts! My mom told me her grandmother used to bribe her with chicklets...DH said he knew to be quiet or his mom would give him "the look."
2. More for when they are older...DH and I plan on being able to tell our kids NO. I'm sorry all your friends got their belly buttons pierced at age 14, but we don't want you to. No, you can't be out all hours of the night in high school. No means no...and we do it because we love you.
3. Anything that jeopardizes their safety because of us neglecting to pay attention to where they are/what they are doing.
1. Use foul language and curse words in front of their children. This applies to rude behavior too.
2. Drag their kid into 7-11 in the morning for breakfast. (Really...what is there to eat for breakfast in a 7-11 that is good for a kid? Is it really so hard to buy a whole wheat bagel and keep it at your house?)
3. Drag their kids around shopping or at the grocery store after 9 PM. I don't just mean a baby because babies can sleep anywhere at first. I mean, toddlers and preschoolers. (I've seen this as late as 11 before.) Your child should be in bed!!!!! This really makes me angry.
What are some things that you see other parents do that you secretly tell yourself you'll never do.
1. Tell my kids to shut up.
2. Call my kids names (even to other people not in the presence of my child).
3. Tell them that there parents wont love them when another child is born
4. You will not discipline my child in my presence. That is my job not yours!! I seen my friends MIL do that all the time!!
1. Physical punishment.
2. Let them have whatever they want whenever they want it.
3. Allow them to run around stores and be loud and disrespectful in public.
4. Use a pacifier when they are too old..oh and calling it a pacey.
Come back in a year or two and let's see how many of your personal rules you have broken. The only thing being a parent has taught me has been to never say never, and judging other parenting styles is just rude.
You have no idea what was going on 2 minutes before you walked by that person and assumed you knew what was going on.
Ignoring my children in public - yes.
Being the parent that allows for their child to jump on furniture like its a playground set - ugh!! We have a playground approx. 10 min walking distance from where we live, so when I want our son to get a bit of excercise, I'll take him there, and teach him to respect the furniture
Super true!!!! Once you have kids I think all the rules change!! imo
Yeah, I was thinking this too. About how we all are saying, "I'm never gonna..." b/c watch - we will.
I completely agree with this... although I have never called my son names, told him to shut up, etc there are things on these lists that I have done. Not give them fast food... one french fry every once in awhile isn't going to kill anyone.
:::grabs popcorn:::
You should all write these things down and look back in a few years. You'll be surprised. Esp those who say they'd ignore their kids in public/when they misbehave. Until you've dealt with a temper-tantrum throwing toddler, you have NO idea.?
No one is suggesting that you shouldn't have ideas about how to parent your kids, obviously. Just that you should pause a few seconds before you assume you know what's going on with strangers in public. I can't wait to be judged constantly. It's one of the parts of motherhood I'm most excited for. (/sarcasm font)
Women are such b!tches to other women, and it drives me insane when women without children sit on their freaking high horses and judge those that do. It's just too easy, that's all.
Yes, but this is not what the OP asked. She said, "never". God forbid the experienced parents around here offer input!?
While there are many things that I don't want to do that I have done, I feel like I still have them on my "don't do" list. Just because I've done something once or twice does not mean I want to make a habit of it!
I have spanked Joaquin. Yes. Am I happy I did it? Hell no! Do I want to do it again? Nope! Will I do it again? I will try my very best not to and keep myself from going to that place that took me there in the first place again.
We're all human and we'll do things we are not proud of or that may not be in line with our belief sytem. Does it mean we should throw our believe system out the window? No. But it is important to know that there will be hard days, very hard days. Don't beat yourself up too much for going against what you believe, but do your best to get back on track.
Joaquin's hospital and Isela's birth center med & intervention free "hypnobabies" birth stories
Oh Jesus, not the same.?
There is a difference between fundamental parenting beliefs and then parenting preferences. I think we can all agree that we want to raise our kids in a safe home and have them grow up to be morally responsible people.
Have I fed my DS fast food? - yes
Have I given my DS snacks/toys that he is quiet and distracted? - yes
I don't think this makes me a bad mom. I told myself that I would never give my kids any of those gerber graduates snacks. That didn't last long. I also told myself no paci after a certain point. That changed too because of the circumstances. There are things that you should keep an open mind about and be flexible. When it comes to your fundamental beliefs, I would stick with those. Sorry if this doesn't make sense.
<><
Tizzle 10/07 ~ Boppy 7/09 ~ Chicken 1/12
Books read in 2013: ~ Audiobooks listened to in 2013: 3
Currently reading: The Fiery Cross by Diana Gabaldon
Currently listening to: The Dark Divine by Bree Despain
my currently-reading shelf:
You just contradicted yourself. Which is it?
And you realize kids HAVE to learn to deal with being told no, right?