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Would you ever be a foster parent?

jenifairiesjenifairies
in Babies: 9 - 12 Months

My grandma always had foster kids when I was little (she did it for 15-20 years, had dozens of kids) and it was something I always wanted to do. But now that I have DD frankly I don't know if I would. I think maybe when she and our other kids are older (like 10+) then we might think about it. It's such a huge commitment, and you never truly know what kind of problems the poor children have. My first concern would have to be my kids' safety.

 

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Re: Would you ever be a foster parent?

  • star173star173 member
    I would like to do something like that if we are in a situation where we could once our kids were in college, and we'd be selective as to who we'd foster.
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  • JanimalJanimal member
    I want to.  DH doesn't.  Before I met DH I was considering it, because I wasn't sure I would ever marry and didn't want to have a baby on my own but always wanted to be a Mom.
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  • jen_k2jen_k2
    I'll admit it. no I wouldn't. A customer where I used to work fostered children & as rewarding as she thought it was, she had a boatload of horror stories that went along w/it.
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  • EchowyspEchowysp member
    No.
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  • Amy SchrammAmy Schramm
    Nope.
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  • SobachkaSobachka
    No never. I absolutely am every child's nightmare of a mother. Why do this to kids?
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  • ABMcKinneyABMcKinney
    We are considering fostering to adopt, but I'm too emotional to take care of a kid and then watch them leave. I'd end up falling in love and they'd just break my heart.
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  • CytinaCytina
    I was thinking about this the other day... but I don't think the timing is right - I would want either DH or me to be able to stay home full-time if we were to have a foster child. 
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  • violetvirgovioletvirgo

    yes, but we both have agreed that 5 or 6 is our age limit and we would probably only do it as a foster to adopt.  my aunt fostered children for years and i think it's an amazingly selfless thing to do, but i would be concerned with older kids.

    i get that it's hard and can come with challenges, but these kids deserve a loving, stable family and home just as much as my dd does.  

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  • lizzie53084lizzie53084

    imageSobachka:
    No never. I absolutely am every child's nightmare of a mother. Why do this to kids?

    Lol this one has me curious! Splain please????

    I want to but I have never discussed it with DH. We are pregs with #3 right now and he is never home and we are going to have at least 1 more baby so I wouldn't be able to do it until the kids were at least in HS. I would love to do it as long as I could be selective as to who I get. If I could get the very young ones and give them a possitive experience it would be awesome. Everyone needs a great start so I would love to do it.

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  • Buckets of MoonbeamsBuckets of Moonbeams

    No, and I wouln't adopt either, I just came on too late to post in the original adopting thread.  I am not one of those people who loves kids.  I love my OWN kid beyond words, but I pretty much don't like other kids, not even my H's niece (I can't even think of her as my niece!).  Call me cold if you'd like, I probably am, but I have absolutely zero desire to be around random babies or children for extended periods of time.  I have 2 young cousins I like to be around, and I think I'll love my sister and brother's kids, and one of my BIL's.

     

    In high school, I briefly dated a guy who had been a foster kid for most of his life.  He had sooooooooo many problems.  I know his story isn't every foster kid's story, but it's the only brush with fostering kids I've ever had.  His foster parents were even more messed up than the kids they fostered.  They were truly nuts and I can't believe they were allowed to foster parent.  Their house was always filthy, the clothes were filthy, the younger kids were flithy, she was mean and nasty, and she had all the foster kids bunked together in the garage-barely-turned-bedroom.  I think they had about 6 high-risk foster kids at a time...neither parent worked, yet she drove a Cadillac Escalade.  You tell me where the money she got for those kids went.

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