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If you're Christian & DH is Jewish or vice versa...

CytinaCytina
in Babies: 9 - 12 Months
How are you raising LO with respect to religion?  We were planning to raise DS with both religions - celebrating both sets of holidays - educating on both but the more I think about it, the more I think it might be confusing?  To add to that, DH is not a "good Jew" so I've had to buy books on how to celebrate the different holidays and I feel like it's up to me to take the reins on making sure both religions get equal time (even though he says it's important to him too).  Thoughts?
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Re: If you're Christian & DH is Jewish or vice versa...

  • GertsGerts

    Ugh, great question. I have no idea how we're going to handle this. I'm not a big fan of organized religion, but it would be nice for DD to have some spirituality of some kind.

    I've considered Unitarian Universalism, since that's more about spirituality than religion. It embraces all faiths.

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  • trixR4kidztrixR4kidz

    The rabbi who married us told us that it is almost ALWAYS the wife's job to make the religion in the family.  Not that is happens on purpose, it just happens.

    We are having my entire family here tonight for Passover and DH's family is coming this weekend for Easter.  DH doesn't really do Jesus, just the more commericial aspects.  Since I don't do Jesus either, DD probably won't get too much instruction on him, although she will know the family traditions and whatever else I know about Jesus (I find all religions fascinating and have taken several classes.) 

     

    Kudos to you for trying so hard to incorporate both!  

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  • iris427iris427 member

    I think if you want your child to grow up with both sets of holidays, you almost have to put more effort into celebrating the Jewish ones, because Judaism is a minority religion here and your child will be exposed more to the Christian holidays by peers, the media, retail, etc.

    If your husband isn't willing to put in the effort, I guess it's not that important to him.

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  • Mustang SallyMustang Sally

    Wow, I almost could have written this post. ?

    Well, my family is not very religious at all, and DH refers to himself as "Jewish Lite" so we decided we would celebrate both sets of holidays and educate DS about both religions, not forcing one or the other. ?Basically that means doing the main Jewish holidays with DH's family, and Christmas with mine. ?We'll see how it goes...

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  • SparkFishSparkFish
    We are not actively raising DD in any religion, although we will celebrate the holidays that our relatives celebrate. As pp said, since Christianity is the dominant religion, that means that DD will probably be exposed more to Christian holidays than to Jewish ones. But, we do have some very observant Jewish relatives, so I'm sure she will also be exposed to Jewish holidays as well. If DD ever decides she wants to attend services or follow a particular faith, we will be supportive, but we don't plan on taking her to church or synagogue.
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  • iris427iris427 member
    Also you could maybe send your child to the JCC later for daycare or afterschool care or summer camp. I practically grew up at the JCC and almost got more of my Jewish identity there than in my own home.
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  • bunny731bunny731 member

    I am Jewish, DH is not. We decided before children to actively raise them one or the other. DH was not particularly tied to his religion; we are raising them Jewish

    In respect to 'belief' it is confusing. On some key 'belief' fundamentals it either is, or is not. But for those that take an educational approach, rather than a belief approach, then I suppose participating in both can be less confusing.

    I also think it is very difficult to provide deep immersion for two or more religions. That may involve the learning of languages, an affinity for holidays and traditions more obscure, a desire to connect with the past.

     

     

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  • WifeofaMarineWifeofaMarine
    Us exactly! I'm Christian and DH is Jewish. We've been going to church pretty regularly with my parents lately, DS and I while DH is at work. DH comes with us to holiday church services. We all go to holiday services at?synagogue, DH, DS and I with his family. We plan to educate him about both religions, including celebrating both sets of holidays, basically Christian holidays with my family and Jewish holidays with his. DS will be baptized a month from tomorrow on Mother's Day. We are also going to talk to the rabbi who co-officiated our wedding (with my presbyterian pastor) about a coming of age ceremony.
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  • FutureMrsHall06FutureMrsHall06

    I'm Catholic (and go to church and everything!) and DH is half Jewish (does not go to temple) by birth.  We discussed this before we got married and we will be raising our children Catholic. 

    We will, however, teach them of DH's heritage.  I don't even think DH knows what passover is, but we will celebrate the Jewish holidays loosely-more for tradition then religion.

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