Anyone not really care re: birth plan?

bakemeacake · March 2009

So, my doula gave me a sheet to fill out for a birth plan and I have to say I honestly don't really care about most of it. Am I strange? Here's what I care about: 1. No one else in delivery room but me and DH (and doula/dr.'s/nurses) 2. Please clean off baby before you hand her to me

I mean, whatever else happens, happens. I've never given birth before so I just can't grasp the idea of trying to make a plan for it. Maybe I'll need drugs, maybe I won't. Maybe I'll want to wear my glasses, or maybe I won't. How do I know? If the dr. thinks I should do something or need something, I'm going to go with their suggestions. Rooming in with baby might sound good now, but maybe when it's all said and done I'll want her to go to the nursery.

Does that make me weird?

schmoodle · March 2009

My birth plan = whatever my doctor wants to do that results in a live baby. Beyond that I just don't care. I understand why some people do though, I just have a different POV with our history and care about nothing but the end result, rather than the process.

onelove13 · March 2009

That doesn't make you weird. I've been hearing a lot about them and I know its important to have/think about but I can't really get into it

rockchalkbride · March 2009

No, I totally agree with you. I would have to put "it depends" for most of those answers!

britti<3 · March 2009

I will do whatever the trained professionals tell me to do as long as I don't have to feel the majority of it.

You really are requesting that the baby be clean before you hold her?

Runnerwife · March 2009

My birth plan: I will get what I need when I need it. End of story.

I think you're being realistic, not weird.

freeburger16 · March 2009

I'm not making a birth plan - I am going in with an open mind and am prepared to be flexible. Whatever happens, happens.

librarianlisa · March 2009

I'm totally with you on this. I looked a couple of fill-in-the-blank plans over, and I just kept thinking, "How the heck do I know what I'm going to want?!" I've never been thru this before, and I am going to try to know my options and then go with what feels right/what doc recommends at the actual time.

TennisWife815 · March 2009

Mine is:

Me and DH in room only.?

Epi please.

Would like to have baby vaginally, but if it requires vacuum or forceps I'll take the c-section.?

inbetween · March 2009

I don't think it makes you weird! I'm right there with you. I don't know if I will need/want an epi, and as long as I have a healthy baby I don't care!

hilltop · March 2009

I do not like the idea of them. I think that they are offensive to the medical professionals who are trying to take care of you and your baby. Just seems a bit control freakish to me.

Ras Empress · March 2009

I filled one out but didn't use it and no one asked for it. DH and I talked about what I wanted so he was in charge of telling people my wishes

mrsjazzsinger · March 2009

I feel the same way - I was even talking about this with my OB today because he asked if I had one.

There are a few things I know that I'd like:

1) DH to cut the cord if possible

2) I want to try and start breastfeeding her as soon as possible after she is born (pending she has no problems that need further monitoring)

3) I hate overhead lighting so I want the room nice and dim

That is about it. As far as pain meds go - I plan on getting an epi if I need one, but my mom had a 5 hour l&d with me and her mom had a 2 hour l&d with her (both first babies)...so on the chance that I follow suit and am progressing along quickly, I may just try and use the techniques to go naturally (especially since an epi can slow things down). But if I don't and have a much longer l&d then I am totally fine with deciding to get the epi if I can't handle it. Basically, I'm just staying flexible - it is my first pregnancy and first birth experience and I have no idea what to expect so it seems silly to me to try and dictate every last little detail.

I also completely trust my doctor in any decisions he'll make regarding my l&d if an emergency or something out of the ordinary were to arise, and he is very supportive of what I've told him about my plan so far.

bakemeacake · March 2009

britti<3:

you really are requesting that the baby be clean before you hold her?

Yeah, I'm not really thrilled with the idea of having all those bodily fluids all over whatever it is that I'm wearing at the time..especially since I probably won't be in any condition to jump out of bed and shower/change.

blueeyedgirl27 · March 2009

You're not weird. I never turned in a birth plan to my OB, but I had one written out that I hoped to follow. Lemme just say it completely went out the window. I'd planned on a med-free birth with the ability to walk the halls, soak in the jacuzzi, & try different positions to help relieve pain from the contrax. I didn't want an IV, didn't want to be constantly hooked up to EFM, stuff like that. Unfortunately, my water broke, so I had to have the IV and constant EFM and I had to be confined to bed. I ended up getting an epi at 6cm dilation because the back labor was so intense and there's only so much you can do in terms of changing positions when you're in bed. I liked the idea of rooming in, but when you've been awake for more than 36 hours and sheer exhaustion has set in, sending the baby to the nursery wasn't such a bad thing.

lhull · March 2009

Yeah, mine goes like this. Don't show me baby's head coming out in a mirror or ask me to feel it. Give me the epi. I am not a Doctor so I am not going to make the decisions. I trust my doc.

goldielux1176 · March 2009

I totally agree with you. Who knows what I will want when it comes down to it!

schmoodle · March 2009

bakemeacake:
britti<3:

you really are requesting that the baby be clean before you hold her?

Yeah, I'm not really thrilled with the idea of having all those bodily fluids all over whatever it is that I'm wearing at the time..especially since I probably won't be in any condition to jump out of bed and shower/change.

You'll likely be wearing a hospital gown that you can change out of right after, at least that was my experience and that of everyone I know. I don't see an issue with wanting the baby cleaned, but if that's your reasoning, it's not like you'll be wearing your own clothes I don't think (unless where I and my friends gave birth is weird).

angeltex · March 2009

Nothing ever goes according to plan.

kyoto · March 2009

I personally think birth plans are a little weird. Sure, have an idea of what you'd like, but to hand the professionals a written set of instructions is kind of strange. I had no problem just telling my doctor things as I wanted them. 2 minutes before my daughter was born, I said 'could you put her on top of me when she is born?'; Doctor said: 'Sure'. There. No written plan necessary.

mickey84 · March 2009

I'm right with you. I made one with my doula also, and my doctor pretty much laughed at half of it. I figure its a plan - my plans never pan out exacly how i want them to - haha. GL with yours.. ;-)

kyoto · March 2009

schmoodle:
bakemeacake:
britti<3:
you really are requesting that the baby be clean before you hold her?
Yeah, I'm not really thrilled with the idea of having all those bodily fluids all over whatever it is that I'm wearing at the time..especially since I probably won't be in any condition to jump out of bed and shower/change.
You'll likely be wearing a hospital gown that you can change out of right after, at least that was my experience and that of everyone I know. I don't see an issue with wanting the baby cleaned, but if that's your reasoning, it's not like you'll be wearing your own clothes I don't think (unless where I and my friends gave birth is weird).

?

LIke I just posted, I did want my daughter to be put on my chest after she was born. They put a towel on my chest first, so I didn't get stuff on me. But as soon as they took her to bathe her, I changed into a new gown anyway.?

ASUsundevil97 · March 2009

I agree with you. ?If there are too many plans in your birth plans, then there may be a disappointment.

hiswife062808 · March 2009

I am with ya! I say...whatever happens happens...

1st rule- DH & My mom ONLY allowed in room during delivery.

2nd- Clean her and weigh her quick so I can hold her!

3rd- Nobody is allowed in, until I am cleaned up and holding my baby girl!

4th- DH is to cut her cord and he is to stay with her the entire time!

As for the rest- I will let them know when I am in there in the moment! LoL

katekirschner · March 2009

nope. my birth plan is to go with the flow and be open to whatever is happening or has to happen.?

mrs.meteowrite · March 2009

My hospital gave me a form to fill out, and honestly, some of the stuff they put on there I think they added just because it was something that had NO actual impact on labor and they wanted you to feel like you could control something. For example, they wanted me to check a box about whether I wanted the lights on or dimmed. I think they put that on there just to give moms something they *could* totally control during labor. I also can't imagine a situation where I'd care about the lights but not be able to voice my opinion.

So for me, yeah, I want my doctors to know that I'm going to try to go as far as I can naturally, and that I think that being hooked up to IVs and monitors will stress me out. However, I trust they'll tell me when it's time to let that go. Anything beyond that seems like more paperwork.

kel-bel78 · March 2009

hilltop:
I do not like the idea of them. I think that they are offensive to the medical professionals who are trying to take care of you and your baby. Just seems a bit control freakish to me.

...My thoughts exactly!

aspade · March 2009

Wow, I really thought I was odd woman out, but you all make me feel much better. All I want is drugs if possible and for just my DH to be in the room with us. I have a friend who's an L&D nurse, and she confirms what you all have said, that the elaborate 6-page birth plans are laughable. I mean, there are things I wouldn't want (like a c-section), but if the doc ends up saying they're necessary, I will go with it like a champ (okay, maybe with a little bitching & moaning).

goldenprincess · March 2009

Well if you're weird than I'm weird too b/c I feel the same way about it as you do. I honestly could never understand why some women make such a big deal out of a birth plan. I didn't have one for DS and everything went fine.

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