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Thought I was doing okay

AmandaAllisonAmandaAllison
in Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

I had my second c/p in January. Work was super busy and I just got distracted I guess. I definitely didn't grieve in the same way as I did the first. Then I went to Jamaica with friends, one of whom is 8 months pregnant (due 2 wks after my first EDD) and has a 2 year old who LOVES his mommy! The first day or two was okay, I'd think about it somewhat, but not a ton. Then on the third day, it was all I could do not to cry every second.

My friend and her husband know about my m/c, but I didn't want to make them feel uncomfortable, nothing they could do about it. When we got back, I wrote to my friend and she sent me the nicest message saying that she knew it was hard for me being around her and that DH and I will make great parents someday.

I find myself thinking more and more about it now and thinking I'll never be a mommy. We didn't tell a lot of people about the second pregnancy and loss, so it's a little harder to deal with.

Thanks ?for letting me ramble!

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Re: Thought I was doing okay

  • lovesinthehouselovesinthehouse
    What a sweet friend. You WILL make a great mommy someday! Don't give up hope!
    missed miscarriage began 04/08, ended 07/08 Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker BabyFetus Ticker
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  • Cow-girlCow-girl member

    Sorry you had a rough time..  Its so hard to be around pg women and babies for me now..  Its just a reminder that I lost my baby.  But I promise it will get better... 

    I pray that God sends you that healthy baby you are longing for...

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  • Jamers615Jamers615

    I would like to think that sometimes, God needs more angels, and he sends those of us who are strong enough to handle it, those little angels to carry, but not keep.

    I also feel that in return, someday when it is time, God will send us our babys that we WILL get to keep.

    But I know all too well that the waiting is horrible.

    Keep your chin up hon.  We're all here for you!

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  • Hesed139Hesed139
    It seems like the emotional pain will never end, but I promise it will get easier. I always had a hard time after being around people a lot. It definitely helped to get out and hang out with friends, but when I got home, all the emotions I had been pushing aside just came out like crazy. I can't tell you how many times I have told my husband, "I thought I was doing okay" and then needed to cry. It eventually got to where the crying episodes were further and further apart. We get stronger and stronger every day, but the love we have for the child we have lost will always be there. When the loss is still fresh, it can cause us pain. It has been 3 months since my loss, and though I feel great most days, every once in a while I am in a funk, and just need some space. God is faithful to us though, and is always there to listen to us when we call him. My faith has been strengthened through my M/C and I know that through my faith in Jesus's forgiveness, I will one day see my precious baby in heaven that He is holding in His arms.
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