Blended Families

How common is it..

For a man and a woman who have joint physical and legal custody (time is split 50/50) for someone to get child support?

Everytime there is an argument BM ALWAYS threatens to take DH to court for child support. I think she is bluffing & I think it is hilarious to say that. It always makes DH wanna drop it and be like "fine whatever, you win." IMO though it would be impossible for her to get it.

Of course, I don't have any expert opinion that's just my 2 cents. Am I wrong?

And for the record, DH pays for all of SS's school lunches, daycare costs (even though we don't use it-she needs it!) and his health insurance premiums. Everything else (co pays, haircuts, clothes, random things) they are supposed to split 50/50. And DH hasn't once asked her for a cent.

Re: How common is it..

  • I think it is worth talking to a lawyer about it. ?By getting an accurate picture from an objective legal professional, your DH may see the real picture and be less fearful of BM's threats.

    Make an appointment with a lawyer, make a list showing what BM pays for and what DH pays for and let the lawyer tell you what the likely outcome would be in BM tries to ask for child support. ??

  • It's possible for either party to get CS. We have my SD about 40% of the time, more actually because her mom likes to go out and party all the time, but from the court's perspective we have SD 40% of the time and we still pay child support. Alot has to do with the income levels of each parent and the # of over night visits they each have with the child.

    She could take your DH to court and request CS, doesn't mean she'll get it but it's possible. In the meantime, I would keep records and receipts for all the things you and your DH have been paying for as it relates to the child.

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  • SaranSaran member
    DH has joint custody 50-50 with BM and we still pay $200/mo in child support because DH makes more money. Even if time is even, they want to make sure the children have the same standard of living in both homes. I believe there is a calculation that every state uses to come up with the dollar amount. So what kept our child support low even though he makes alot more money is that we have children as well that he takes care of, he pays med insurance, extra carricular activities and all of that is taken into consideraton.
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  • imageSaran:
    DH has joint custody 50-50 with BM and we still pay $200/mo in child support because DH makes more money. Even if time is even, they want to make sure the children have the same standard of living in both homes. I believe there is a calculation that every state uses to come up with the dollar amount. So what kept our child support low even though he makes alot more money is that we have children as well that he takes care of, he pays med insurance, extra carricular activities and all of that is taken into consideraton.
  • When a friend got divorced a few years ago, he was told there wasn't full joint custody in TX.  He and his x split the kids..I think he had 3 days and the x had them for 4.  He had to pay child support to her, but it wasn't much.  I think it was less than $200 a month for 2 kids.  If she had full custody of the kids, I think she would have gotten closer to $900 based on what I knew of his income.
  • imageMrsSledge:
    When a friend got divorced a few years ago, he was told there wasn't full joint custody in TX.  He and his x split the kids..I think he had 3 days and the x had them for 4.  He had to pay child support to her, but it wasn't much.  I think it was less than $200 a month for 2 kids.  If she had full custody of the kids, I think she would have gotten closer to $900 based on what I knew of his income.

     

    Hmmm, well I don't know for sure. I know my parents had joint and we saw them evenly & neither parents paid CS.  Also, the time in this case is literally split 50/50 3 days with dad 3 days with mom & they alternate every other saturday.

  • I wonder if there would have to be a change in circumstances for her to ask for child support. Especially when custody is split 50/50.

    Last year BM and DH were in an argument of where SD would go to school the next year. She said to both DH and I (this was in person) that FINE, I may just have to take you to court for child support and then see how you like paying me money every month.  She made it sound like a threat if we wouldn't agree with her.  DH just said, if that's something you feel you need to do, that's your choice.  Then she got really mad because we didn't have a reaction to it.  We just walked away after that.  So, yes, my guess is BM is just bluffing you and your DH.

    We are also in the same circumstance as you with regards to 50/50 and DH pays for all the extra stuff such as school, medical, etc even though that is also supposed to be split 50/50.  We just don't ask anymore because she doesn't pay half, and as long it's something we know is benefiting SD and being paid directly to the school, etc. - we just pay for it.

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