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Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss
Cow-girl
member
Poll: What has helped you the most?
Cow-girl
member
In dealing with your loss?
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Re: Poll: What has helped you the most?
Talking to other women who have been in my place. Having someone who understands me... with no questions is wonderful.
Talking with other women
Crying
Waiting until I was ready to go out, back to work, etc.
Talking with others who have experienced loss.
Forcing myself to keep moving.
Talking to others.. staying busy.. "trying" to resume life as normal. Doesn't hurt to curl up in bed and watch a funny movie or get out of the house.
I definitely was in shock for a while, so despite "moving forward" it just takes a while, emotionally. Someone posted the 7 stages of grief on here once and it rang very true - there are just kind of those emotional stages you pass through as you deal with it.
Nest Bio ~ ~ Baby Food Blog
Forcing myself to talk about it. My friends would hint that they wanted to know what happened, and I told them. Making it a real experience like that, for me, was more helpful than shutting it out and just repeating "I lost the baby" over and over again. That, and I sleep with the teddy I bought Patrick every night. It helps to have something physical to hold on to, for me.
And my friends, taking my cue, never refer to him as "the baby" or "your pregnancy", but as "your son". Recognizing that even though I didn't get the time with him, that he was still my child, has helped me to move forward a great deal already.
My faith in God has grown since my miscarriage
My DH who I love so much
The women on this board--hearing their stories and their support
this board! no one knew we were expecting, so it's nice to have ladies to talk about the experience with, who actually understand what you are feeling, and are able to offer more than just 'I'm sorry."
My FI - he has always been my rock, and now I know I couldn't get thru this without him.
My dog - he is my best friend, and just his presence has been a huge help to me. Even if we just go outside to play for a few minutes, it's a welcome distraction to the racing thoughts in my head.
I forgot to answer my own post..
My faith in God, my pastor, my church family, and my family & friends.
My DH has been wonderfully supportive, he lets me "meltdown" and he kisses my forhead and tells me he loves me.. I dont know what I would do without his support and love. I am very greatful that God sent him to me. Good thing God is in control and I am not or I may not have ended up with such a wonderful DH....
And who could forget my fabulous friends on PL, TTCAL, and SAL! I dont think I would have made it through my first loss without them. And even my buddies on SAL have been supportive since my loss last week. I really dont know where I would be without you girls! It is a great outlet to speak to people who truly know what you are going through!
Talking/IM'ing and connecting with other women who have gone through similar losses. I have made some of the most amazing friends through the most horrible circumstances - most of who I have never met in person. I also read a lot about what to do next time...what to expect with grieving...and I blog. The blogging has really been a great release. I would definitely suggest that.
I'm home these days and on yahoo messenger if you ever want to chat. Just PM me and I'll send you my screen name.
The women on this board. DH and I did not tell anyone about our pregnancy so I find it so comforting to be able to talk about it and get support from the women here who have gone through similar expeirences. It is so nice to know that there are people out there who understand and have their arms wide open to people they have never met. Thank you all
My wonderful DH who had been my rock
Talking to other women who have gone through the same thing (especially on this board) has REALLY helped.
Letting myself cry and grieve as I need to, and taking time off work (then slowly pushing myself back into it) helped as well.
We had Brady cremated, and his urn is in our living room. It's like having a small part of him with us. When I get upset, I hold his urn and his stuffed frog and I talk to him.
We told our 5 year old that he could have Brady's frog and that whenever he wanted to talk to his baby brother, he just had to say it to the frog, and then when he goes to sleep the frog will take his messages to his brother in heaven. That helps him a lot.
Talking, staying busy, praying and reading scripture, and having my 2 year old son who I am so thankful to have.
Verses from the Bible
This board
My praying sisters at my bible study
The passage of time
I don't know how I would get through this without my faith in God. He has shown up when no one else would and in him I have hope for the future.
9 angels in heaven-3 in my arms and 1 in the NICU
Mono/di twin girls: Josephine born to heaven and Evangeline born Earthside at 25w
This board has helped so much in the past few days. I haven't really talked in depth about it, other than to my DH. I am so thankful to be able to talk to others who know exactly how I feel right now.
I also don't think I could get through this without my DH. He has been so supportive and loving. Also knowing that we will one day have our baby, that is what keeps me from breaking down.
Having other ladies in my church who have also had 2nd tri losses. They are so great to talk to and they know exactly what I'm going through.
Blogging about this whole experience has really helped.
The loss boards that I'm on.
My DH. I don't know what I'd do without him. He gives me strength to get through each day.
You ladies! Being able to talk about what I am feeling and going through has been such a blessing. Thank you all so much!
My faith. My most peaceful thoughts include my babies in heaven playing with my puppy (who I lost last October) and in the arms of my Grandfather.