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Friend with IF cried to me today. SO sad..

ShainaShaina
in Success after IF
A pretty good friend of mine is starting IUI's next month.  She started TTC excatly a year ago, got PG first month and had a m/c at 8 weeks.  Nothing since.  She went to a clinic and so far they are 'unexplained'.  She is so upset already and so scared the IUI's won't work and that she will have to resort to IVF and scared that if so, that it may also not work.  I feel terrible for her.  I have been nothing but supportive and positive for her but seriously, I feel like her whole situation brought me back to almost 5 years ago when we started to TTC.  I don not envy her.  Hopefully HOPEFULLY she will get PG on an IUI but I am still so scared for her and all the crap she has to go through now.  I know she will be doing some form of injectible and the trigger shot.....*sigh*  I feel like I am back on that emotional rollercoaster once again...IF SUCKS!
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Re: Friend with IF cried to me today. SO sad..

  • tina623tina623 member

    Yes, yes it does. 

    I have a friend at work who actually got PG on the pill (lucky ducky) and she was so thrilled that she told everyone when she was 6 weeks.  Now at 10 weeks, she found out that she has 2 mutations.  One should of caused a m/c by 8 weeks, but didn't, her next hump is 12 weeks.  They said if she makes it past 12 weeks, she'll be fine (she has to now take a medication the rest of her life) but they told her she couldn't have anymore after this.  I just feel so awful for her. 

    It always brings me back and I hurt all over again.

    twin girls after 43 months of TTC.. Katherine Emily (5 lbs 12 oz 19 1/4 in) and Karly Elizabeth (5lbs 7 oz 19 in) imageLilypie!!My bio!! !!My Blog!! imageimage

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  • firsttogofirsttogo

    I know this is odd, but I always try to talk to new IFers about not thinking about "all that could happen" before it does. I was freaked about the possibility of clomid, ect I never even thought that anything more than that could be necessary. As we completed each step, I realized that it was a grieving process. You have to grieve the "perfect conception" to be able to move to the next step. IVF was NEVER an option for me, but as we got deeper in to the IF world, I got used to the idea that it could be necessary.

    I know my post is rambling, but it is hard to think of the worst case, when the process is just beginning.  

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  • schmoodleschmoodle member
    That is so hard. You are great to be there for your friend. To be honest, I think it was much harder and more painful for me when we first found out that we had to go to the RE and everything was so unknown and I had no idea what would happen (probably didn't help that 2 days after being referred to the RE I got 2 pregnancy announcements from friends who got pg on their first try). After the RE told us it was IVF or nothing, I think I actually felt a lot better because we had a plan, I understood more and I felt more in control. I hope your friend's journey is short so she doesn't have to reach that point of acceptance, but if not I at least hope that maybe some of this is the initial fear/shock and it can subside.
    *** It's funny because I'm fat ***
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  • TheSkimmyTheSkimmy member
    Thats really nice that you can be there for her as a great friend that "gets it" so many of us don't have that IRL!!!!
    image
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    Married 8.13.2005, M/C 12/8/06- 5 weeks, M/C 2/27/07- 7 weeks, M/C w/ D&C 8/10/09-6.5 weeks *Charles Lawrence born 5/2/08 @ 3:14am, 7lb 8oz, 20.5 inches. Clomid, Crinone and baby aspirin. *Alexandra Claire born 9/14/10 @ 9:52am 6lb 14oz, 20.5 inches. Femara, Crinone and baby aspirin. Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers
    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
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