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Eco-Friendly Family
LadyNikon
member
Co-workers and culture.. ( little long)
LadyNikon
member
I was surfing the site where MIL got our cloth diapers. DH had purchased the same diapers for his sister. my co-worker looked over and said " cloth ehh.. yeah right.. that will last a good week then you will be back with the huggies crew." I said no actually I want to make my own baby food as well. That got a BIG O.O !
Now I am Black in the US. I tend to have a different view from most in my neighborhoods/ family members. I get the " black people dont do that.. " speech to mostly everything I do. The natural way of cooking and cleaning tends to escape alot in my neighborhoods. I used to cook steamed veggies for my X and he asked "why is the food so raw.." I tend to get called the white girl of the neighborhood for my thinking. I could care less about it because I feel bad that people would rather take the easy way out rather than the better for me/planet alternative. I try cooking for some people to show that the food is actually tasty.. but I get evil looks half the time. I have almost given up on proving my point..
Now.. do you get ragged on by people for taking the "lesser than easier way out?" If you are <insert race> do you deal with such ignorance? I find people outside of the US have less of a problem with my ideas. Another co worker from Jamaica was happy to find out that I wanted to make my own baby food. She said " we made ours all the time.. I don't know what is the big deal".
Should I be offended?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Co-workers and culture.. ( little long)
I don't think you should be offended about their non-ef attitude. I'm going to generalize but I think it's the American lifestyle and the dependence on convenience items. I would be ticked if someone said that I was acting like X race, as if there was something wrong with it. I hate it when people say ignorant crap like that.
I think that matter the color of your skin, there will always be people set in their ways, and everything you do will be *wrong*.
When I announced what I was naming my first son, my dad made the comment "I thought the baby is white?" Not to be an a$$, but because he was raised that names like Xavian were exotic in nature and belonged to other cultures.
Because cloth diapering, making your own baby food, cooking from scratch, growing a garden, ect are so basic and old fashioned, many people attatch the lifestyle with poor. Which, many of us are not. We are back to basics is all!
Hang in there, and before long, you'll notice those ill commenting neighbors starting to mimic many of the things you do.
I agree that it's the American way of life to go for the easy/convenient way first. You (and most of us here) have different views on things than probably 75-80% of the US population (guessing there) so I wouldnt necessarily equate it to race.
I wouldnt necessarily be offended by the comments of your friends/family/coworkers but what it would do for me is make me more determined to prove them wrong. I had my fair share of sideways glances and comments (and still do) but here we are 5 months into cloth diapering and I'm LOVING it! I wouldnt go back if you paid me.
You just have to take their comments with a grain of salt and move on. It's their ignorance, not yours.
Oh and if my parents would have named me in accordance with my heritage I'd have a name like Helga or Olga.....um, no thank you.
edit: That didnt come across the way I meant it. I meant that I dont think children should have to be named in accordance with the culture of their parents and if they did then I'd have a name like Helga.
My ds will be mixed race. We considered names that would reflect both of our backgrounds and ended up choosing a pretty American name. My dh has been in the U.S, since he was 12 but, culturally, considers himself American.
I can see why.. being an American itself is huge culture difference than alot of places. I can understand the naming scheme. I don't want to name my child Ester ( because I grew up catholic) or Shaquita ( because I grew up in the baltimore city ghettos) I just used the grandmas names. Cathleen from my step-mom who recently passed from cancer. and DH's mom is named Laura. The only naming tradition I kept was naming of the grandparents as the middle name.
It is impossible to escape other people's expectations. ?As a gay single woman in her 30's I will be expected to cd, bf, make my own baby food, and probably to give birth in a chanting commune wearing Birkenstocks. ?I am bound to disappoint.
Good Luck!?
http://oi62.tinypic.com/2w73hq9.jpg
I think Cathleen is beautiful and it obviously has special meaning for you.
If we had gone with his cultural tradition, which his family has encouraged us not to, the baby would have a first name that is passed on the same way last names are passed, his 'first name', a middle name, and our last name. So, my dh and my bil have the same first name, a middle name that they go by, a middle name, and their last name. A little to complicated for Americans. I guess they have extra long mailing envelopes in Sri Lanka to accomodate long names. : )
About the cloth diaper thing... I think so many people really aren't into CDing, eco-friendly stuff, it is foreign to them so they act like it is weird. I have tried to not convince people into it but I have some friends that I encouraged to make their own babyfood and they were all "I so won't have itme for that" (they had younger infants than mine). It's like come on, you have time to watch TV or whatever - just spend a little extra time to make sure your baby gets a healthier alternative! To me it is such an important thing but most people in my "circle" aren't into the stuff that I am into. Or like when my friend's child had some really bad issues with white blood cell counts and I suggested she hold off on like the MMR shot until they figured out his immune system issues, she didn't (I know it is controversial about the autism stuff, but vaccines are taxing on the immune system).
I do feel like my friends laugh it off, or they aren't interested, or they lean towards making fun of it. I am guessing because they are insecure, or uneducated about it (which is fine - it's normal for people to wonder if cloth is really cheaper type of stuff), or because they personally wouldn't want to spend the time and effort.
As for race, no idea.. I am not of any mixed ethnicity or minority but I do think that people are really quick to stereotype. I get the feeling people think I'm becoming hippie when they find out I CD, dry my laundry outside, use only natural body products (like Burt's Bees), joined a farm co-op, compost, breastfeed, co-sleep, etc. But, I am not what you would think as being hippie (clothes, appearance, etc). I know people often say they don't stereotype, but that's why it's called stereotyping.
Don't be offended - good for you for "breaking out of the mold" if people have stereotypes of what your "race is supposed to do" kind of thing - maybe it helps them realize that people can do whatever they want and not care what others think!
Nest Bio ~ ~ Baby Food Blog
Black women in our country are 35% more likely than white women to die from heart disease.
You keep doing what you're doing - steaming those veggies, cooking healthy, doing what you know is best for you and your baby.
Let those people who rag on you go scratch because in 30 years you'll still have a happy, healthy family. Just let their ignorant comments roll off your back.
I've gotten the same thing from some people (oh, you're gonna be THAT kind of mom, huh?) and I am a waspy white girl. People are just always looking to criticize. *grumble*