Male or Female OB - Does it matter?

bobbydsgirl · March 2009

I am wondering how many of you out there preferred having a woman OB versus how many of you liked, trusted and felt comfortable with your male OB in past deliveries.

I am 12 weeks pregnant and in the process of switching OBs. The practice I am leaving had 3 men and I got turned off to them because I heard many complaints that at least 1 of the 3 (who could have delivered my baby) was arrogant, pushy and condescending.

After looking through as many local doctor reviews as I could find online, I decided to try out a different practice, which happens to consist of 2 male OBs. I don't meet with them for a few more weeks (and I hope I like them as much as most other women did).

In the meantime I am watching shows on the Learning Channel which mostly show women delivering babies (such as "Birth Day"), and I am wondering if I should pick a woman if I want someone to assist in delivery who is gentle, soothing, communicative and compassionate. I know I am on the verge of sounding sexist but I really could use some advice from you ladies who have been through delivery before and if you had a preference for a female or if it really didn't matter.

I know it depends on the doctor and they are all professionals (yada yada), but I just want the best birth experience possible.

Thanks.

KatieTheMagnificent · March 2009

I have a male OB and he was wonderful during my first delivery.

You can always look into going to a midwife or hiring a doula, as well.

Ivana_Stolichnaya · March 2009

I prefer a female OB...dont' know why, just do.

BlairWaldorf · March 2009

I have a practice with one male & I find him to be more soothing than some of the women in the practice.

It depends on the actual doctor, not the stereotype you've built in your head towards male doctors.

p0nd77 · March 2009

I have a woman -- I felt more comfortable that way, but all my doctors are and even my dentist is a woman.

besszilla · March 2009

I have an OB who is incredibly thorough and up to date with the latest OB/GYN news. That's what I like about him.

I've had far more awful female OBs than male. That said, you need to be comfortable with who ever you choose.

AMYfromKY · March 2009

My practice has one woman and 6 men. Any of them could deliver my baby. I also have an appt with each one. I've already seen one of the men and he was great.

My mom had a man for my birth and a woman for my brothers. She said the woman was telling her "I've been through this...it isn't bad. You don't need an epi yet" when my mom had been in labor for 18 hours (by the time she would give it to her it was too late). She said she thinks the men are more compasionate because they don't know what we are going through.

OntheWater · March 2009

I had a female OB that I liked but, due to insurance premiums, she stopped practicing. I ended up staying with the practice but moving to a male OB (mostly because I didn't have time to shop around). I thought I wouldn't be comfortable with that, after dealing with a woman since I started going, but I actually am very comfortable with him. He has a great sense of humor and will make you laugh at some of the oddest ( Hmm

moments...he's is younger, very easy going, he is married with children, his wife practices too...so he knows the routine. Honestly, during labor, I may appreciate some humor!!

sdc06 · March 2009

I don't think it matters...what matters is that you like and feel comfortable with your Dr.

I'm a L&D RN and some of the male OB's are much more gente and kind than some of the female OB's. I hope you find a MD that you like

Melissa Villegas · March 2009

I have a male OB and he is wonderful. I heard nothing but rave reviews about him from other mothers and my bff working in labor & delivery and she said she liked him the best so she switched to him so when she does get pregnant he will be her doctor. He explains each step to me and make me feel very comfortable.

jenna0627 · March 2009

I go to a female OB and i love her, she has had three kids herself and is always willing to go above and beyond. However there is a male at the practice and i saw him during our TTC period when we had a lot of problems and i would have been comfortable with him as well. You have to be comfortable with you doc. My friend just changed offices and they let her meet both docs then decide.

cbjpl31 · March 2009

The male OB that delivered my daughter was fantastic. Truth is, I only saw the doctor for a short time right at delivery and right after and then for checkups every 12 hours or so. Outside of that I was primarily cared for by nurses. That doc has since retired but I've chosen another one from the same practice. I meet him next Monday for my 1st appt. There are 2 others in the practice if for some reason I don't click with this one.

diva741 · March 2009

I have never had a male GYN in my life and I was nervous today when I went to my first appointment with him. My old GYN is leaving to start a private practice in Texas in April so it didn't make much sense to see her. I have always gone to female GYN's because I figured a man could not tell me anything about female problems or having a baby. But I was SHOCKED!!! I like my new doctor. He asked me lots of questions, he didn't rush me and he was compassionate and his nurse was nice too. So sometimes the sex of the doctor doesn't matter, it's the level of care

DiscusCoach · March 2009

The doctor isn't going to be the one dealing with all the touchy feely stuff. It is all about the nurses.

If you trust your ob, whether he is touchy feely or not, go with him.

We only have one in my town and it is a man.

bobbydsgirl · March 2009

Thanks everybody. You've reassured me about going with a male, so if I like the new doctors I will stick with them. And thanks for the reminder that there will likely be female helpers around too in the form of hospital staff.

ArcticFox · March 2009

I do feel like a woman can relate better.. but I tried a female OB and really didnt' like her. My OB now is a practice with 2 older men. One of them delivered my baby and I am totally happy with them both. In fact I had a m/c in November and the Dr was so sweet and genuine.

BTW with a male OB there is a female nurse in the room at all times during exams.

tobeMrs.Wagner · March 2009

It really depends on the individual instead of their sex. I have a male OB and he is fabulous. I trust him whole-heartedly.

Eclypze · March 2009

I have a Male OB and he was absolutely wonderful through the whole pregnancy. I had a c/s so not sure of his demeanor during a labor situation (hes kinda humorus, so too bad i'll never know lol)

he was great

Genevieved · March 2009

In the end it is whatever you feel comfortable with, this is my first and I went with an all female practice but that is because I have only heard good things about them. However at my first apt. I had to have a pap done and this was the first one I ever had done by a female and I don't think I will every go back to a male. I didn't feel a thing and she was done in no time. I think it also depends a lot on the docs personality because I'm sure you could get a female doc who is a lot like the make doc you talked about.

JenDang · March 2009

I have always been open to male or female OBs. I have moved a lot so have never had a steady Gyno. So I was searching a few weeks ago and decided to go check out a woman OB and I really had a great connection with her. She made me feel very comfortable with her and it eased my nervousness (first pregnancy). I think you just have to go with your gut to make sure it is the right OB for you.

hbkises · March 2009

I used to have a male gyne who I loved but he retired so now i just got his replacement who I happen to love just as much.

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