Parenting after a Loss

***Daytime Confessions***

Re: ***Daytime Confessions***

  • * I really hope that dd has a good day today. I'd hate to lug her, me & all her crap on the train only for her to meltdown & not enjoy the day.?

    * I really wish my phone would stop ringing. Some people ask how I could live without a phone or cell phone. I find it quite peaceful actually when I turn things off.

    * I would rather text people than talk to them on the phone. That way when I'm done with the conversation, there isn't an awkward hanging up process if the other person wasn't finished with the conversation.?

    * I thought with an empty bed, I'd sleep better. I didn't. I was up constantly.?


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  • I have a job interview next month and I am totally unmotivated to do my current job.  I'm acting like I already have the new job.  Perhaps I should be paying more attention to my current job on the off chance that I don't get new job...
  • * The best part of the year is when I can open all the windows, let in some fresh air & get right down to business spring cleaning my house. I hope I'm able to start it this weekend.?
  • Conner slept like CRAP last night. I'm blaming it on the bananas, but I'm still going to give them to him again tonight. We all know he always sleeps like crap. I just like to have something to blame it on.

    I'm taking that jogging stroller to the goodwill today.

  • *i prefer texting than talking on the phone too. it's faster and more to the point--no unnecessary small talk.

    *dh is making a big deal about having to watch the kids friday and saturday morning. if he acts all put out when asked to pull his weight with the kids one more time you may be hearing about what i do to him on the news. 

    *i'm drinking a dr. pepper for breakfast. i've been eating really terrible since going back to work and i feel like crap because of it. 

    *i cannot wait for summer break!

  • I have the rest of the week off from work. Today DD is at daycare, I have a large list of things to do (I've done 1--go me!) but I'm here nesting. I only feel a tad guilty about taking DD to daycare today. I NEVER get anything more than 30 minutes to myself, let alone a whole freaking day. I think I deserve it and DH is a smart guy for not disagreeing with me. Big Smile
  • one more: dd slept from 10 pm to 5 am last night! woot!
  • ***I am scared to start therapy again.  Since I am going to see a new therapist I am going to have to start from the beginning and talk about stuff I would rather not.  I wish they could just get a report of what I have already said in therapy.

    *** I go back to work in less than a month and am both excited and sad.  I hope I can enjoy the last month with Emma and not worry about work.

    *** Emma is napping so well today and I hope it continues!

  • *I feel bad when I get frustrated with DS for screaming at the top of his lungs & I can't soothe him.  I try to calm myself down b/c I know he can sense it.  Poor little guy.  It's the sleep deprivation...I'll try to be a better mommy.
  • *I also prefer to text than call call some people.

    *The girl from my old work yesterday not really talking to me or even looking at my babies is still making me mad I don't know why it just makes me so angry that we used to be good friends and now she barely speaks to me when I come up there. 

    *Ben and his nap strike is going to be the death of me.  I am at my wits end and don't know what else to do.  The little guy is so exhasuted but he just won't fall asleep and stay asleep.  I just resorted to letting him cry it out in his crib (7 minutes, very long minute) this was something I said I would never do but I just don't know what else to do nothing is working.  I layed with him for over an hour and nothing.  He is now sleeping (god I hope this doesn't jinx it) I just hope it lasts because he needs a nap so badly.  God I feel like such a failure as a mother for not being able to get him to go to sleep and stay asleep and I feel like an even worse mother for letting him cry, it broke my heart,

  • To make matters worse the nest freaks out and posts it like 4 times, thank you nest as if I don't feel inadequate enough.
  • *Once again I'm a little sad that hardly anyone commented on my new siggy pic.  Also, only 42 people viewed the post.  I know we've been through this before, but it still stings that I feel like one of the "unpopular" girls on hereSad.  ~Ok, self pity party over~

     

  • ** I went to the YMCA to work out with my mom and SIL on Monday and I walked 2 miles that day and then went to the zoo yesterday and I am sooooooo sore now, I can barely walk. 

    ** I am really mad at my DH all the time because he doesn't help at all with DD or around the house.  His life hasn't changed one little bit, except that now when he goes out I don't go with him which he seems to prefer.  He then gets mad at me because I don't feel like having sex, seriously DH?!?!?!

    ** I love my DD so much that I feel a little guilty about the above confession, I enjoy taking care of her 24/7 I would just like my DH to be a part of her life too, right now he kisses her on the forehead when he leaves for work and when he gets home and that's about it, I'm sad for her about that

    Baby H #1 born in January '09 after a M/C January '08 Baby H #2 born in May '11 Baby H #3 due April 17th 2013
  • * DS's sleep is getting worse, not better. He woke up a sh!teton last night. I'm getting really depressed over it. We upped his daytime ounces b/c everyone kept saying we weren't feeding him enough during awake time which was hurting his sleep. Well, last night he had 35 oz by the dream feed at 11pm- MORE than enough and 10 over what he used to get. And he still woke up at 2am screaming bloody murder. He went down after 2oz more, but still... that is wayyyy too much for him to be eating and he still was up every 1-2 hours after that needing rocking and the paci. I'm at my wits end.

    * Of course, DH is pissing me off too. He refuses to do for me what I do for him when he has shoots. I usually take ALL the night feedings to let him sleep. Well, he only took one last night and complained about it so loudly that I had to wake up. And I was up the rest of the night. I'm so pissed.

  • Kap63: I have gotten so frustrated at DD for crying too and keeping me up all night.  You are not a bad mommy.  It is only natural to feel that way.  I hope it gets better for you guys.
  • imageCrazycrustacean:

       

    * I would rather text people than talk to them on the phone. That way when I'm done with the conversation, there isn't an awkward hanging up process if the other person wasn't finished with the conversation. 

      


    I am the same way! I was beginning to think it was making me anti-social but I really do not care for talking on the phone.

  • * I farking HATE the pacifier. I have now been upstairs 4 times in the past 1/2 hour b/c Leo is yelling bloody murder in his sleep b/c the damn thing fell out. Unbelievable. Someone needs to invent a pacifier that stays in their mouths.
  • one of the reasons I've been staying away from here is b/c I get sick of hearing people talk about how their kid doesn't sttn but they go 4 and 5 hour stretches. I LOVE 3 hours, what I'd do for 4 or 5....
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