Babies on the Brain

How did you know you were ready to have a baby?

DH and I are planning to have only one child. We had planned to wait two more years, then we thought one. I think we might be getting ready but I'm just not sure. How did you know you were ready?

Re: How did you know you were ready to have a baby?

  • You are in a good stable place and are just "ready".
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  • EMTXEMTX member

    You'll know!

    If you're wondering how you'll know, you're not ready yet.


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  • Not sure. ?I struggle with indecision. The responsibility is mind boggling.

    And I respectfully disagree with the post above. I think LOTS of people have them before they ready, whether they realize they aren't ready or not.?

  • imageEMTX:

    You'll know!

    If you're wondering how you'll know, you're not ready yet.

    I agree with this. I used to wonder if we would ever be ready, but one day it just hit me that we were ready.

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  • When you and your husband want a baby ALL time time, and not just some of the time. 
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  • imageLyssapee:
    When you and your husband want a baby ALL time time, and not just some of the time. 
    ]

    Ohhh, I like this answer.  Ditto Lyssapee.

  • imagenlvaden:
    You are in a good stable place and are just "ready".

    Ditto!

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  • We had been together and done a ton of stuff together. We were also married and somewhat financially stable.
  • when you see Expecting moms with bumps and say "awww, I want to be pregnant,and How cute"  (until you really are and its not so cute anymore! )

     

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  • When the second pink line showed up on the test.

    ?

    This is a good answer, though.

    imageLyssapee:
    When you and your husband want a baby ALL time time, and not just some of the time.?
    ?
  • I KNEW I was ready about 3 months after my first was born...I hoped I was ready when we began trying...

    I think if you struggle financially or have a social life that you aren't willing to give up-it might not be time, but if you feel like you handle responsibility and have room in your life for a child for the rest of your lifetime-you're probably on your way to being ready.

    I think it rarely turns out the way you imagine it, and you can't know what to expect-so it is hard to be "ready"...but you'll get there.

    good luck!! the whole journey is mind blowing...

  • I knew I was emotionally ready when I looked at dh and could not imagine not having a child with him.  And when I knew that I was looking forward to morning sickness and a bump and labor and delivery.  And when I knew I wanted the dirty diapers and late night feedings as much as the cute outfits and precious moments.  And when I knew that I didn't just want a baby - I wanted a child, that I watched grow and that I raised to be a decent human being.

    I knew that I was totally ready when we were in a better financial place and could afford the necessities and had a good prospect for our financial future.

    And to quote the wise ones from around here - I knew I was ready when the fear of not being a mother outweighed the fears of having children.


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  • imagenlvaden:
    You are in a good stable place and are just "ready".

    That was our reason too

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  • i just knew. We'd been married for 4 years already and even though he had been ready since the honeymoon I wasn't ready for a long time. I had to get my career on track and I wanted us to live in a house in a good neighborhood and I had to be ready to give up my body and my life to raising a child. I had to accept that I would be focusing on only one personal goal for the next 20 years and that the rest of my goals would have to take a backseat.

    ?What helped me sort out a lot of my fears was reading Misconceptions by Naomi Wolf. It discusses pretty much all the awful things motherhood entails. Sometimes these women's issues get brushed under the rug because everyone is so enamored with pregnancy and babies that they forget the adult woman who used to have her own life before creating a new life.?

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  • I used have a fear of having children; fear of how it would change the dynamics of mine and DH's relationship (I don't anymore). Someone once told me this, and I've found it to be very true for most cases: You'll know you're ready when your want for a child outweighs everything else.
  • imageeasjer05:

    I knew I was emotionally ready when I looked at dh and could not imagine not having a child with him.  And when I knew that I was looking forward to morning sickness and a bump and labor and delivery.  And when I knew I wanted the dirty diapers and late night feedings as much as the cute outfits and precious moments.  And when I knew that I didn't just want a baby - I wanted a child, that I watched grow and that I raised to be a decent human being.

    I knew that I was totally ready when we were in a better financial place and could afford the necessities and had a good prospect for our financial future.

    And to quote the wise ones from around here - I knew I was ready when the fear of not being a mother outweighed the fears of having children.

     

    oh! agreed...this is where DH and I have come to in the last year, and thus are now TTC!

     excellent! Big Smile

  • imageeasjer05:

    quote the wise ones from around here - I knew I was ready when the fear of not being a mother outweighed the fears of having children.

    This. Exactly.

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  • Before we were married DH looked at my interactions with his nephew and said I was a keeper. Also when we agreed on some baby names about two years into the Boyfriend/Girlfriend stage and I was collecting baby clothes.

    I don't think people are truly "ready" until the baby is in your arms but it does make the baby having process a lot easier with two incomes and a stable enviroment that you and your husband feel comfortable bringing a new life into. GL.

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