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ILs and Formula

jebs_girljebs_girl
in Breastfeeding

My ILs watch DS two days a week, I leave about 4 bags of BM for the day (4-5 oz bottles each) but they insist that I bring formula in case something happens to me and I am running late or can't get there to pick him up in time before his next feeding.

I have casually said, yes, I will bring some next time I come, however I was hoping they would forget...but nope.

How would you kindly explain to them that you don't want your child to have formula? I don't want to offend them because they formula fed there children.

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Re: ILs and Formula

  • FriendlyFannyFriendlyFanny
    If you have some freezer stash to spare I would just offer them a couple bags to keep in their freezer.
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  • KellyG6279KellyG6279 member
    I really don't think you should be afraid of offending them by telling them BM only-you're the mom!.  Could you bring some frozen BM over they could keep in their freezer in case of an emergency?  That would be their back-up instead of formula.  I would worry if you brought over formula they would be quick to feed it to your LO if they were having a fussy day.
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  • MrsL.inMarchMrsL.inMarch

    And if you don't have frozen BM to send, just give them one additional bottle. They probably won't need it but maybe it will simmer them.

    Do you think they are asking for formula because they are truly concerned about you being late and the baby being hungry.... or... do you think they just want to use formula and not deal with BM?

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  • makclairmakclair member
    I agree that I would either bring some frozen bags or an extra bottle each day. I bring 4 bottles to daycare every day even though he only takes his third around 4, just in case he was extra hungry or something happened to one of us and we couldn't get there till 6 30 or something.
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  • jlc071903jlc071903 member
    I would have your DH address it...hey, with all the studies that have come out about how good BM is for babies, we have decided to give the baby ONLY BM...no there's nothing wrong with formula, but WE want the immunities from BM for the baby.  So, we won't be bringing any formula over.
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  • marrymemylovemarrymemylove member

    Well since I was FF as a child (and it was really common in the 70s) I would just say "hey I know WE were all fed formula, but you know we know now how much better BM is for a kid. If we'd only known back in the 70s when we were all guzzling cereal at 6 weeks and FF for a year! Well, we've decided to exclusively BF as long as we can, so we won't be using formula".

    ?That wouldn't offend anyone in my family and most of them FF at least some of their kids. They're mostly Drs and dentists and vets and scientists so they know more than anyone how the science has progressed. Back then the difference was known but considered small.??

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  • mn2003mn2003
    I'm obviously in the minority here, but what is the big deal? From what you've said, they don't ever intend to feed formula instead of bm, they want it in case the baby is hungry and they're out of milk and you're not there. I agree that bm is better than formula, but I also think that formula is better than nothing when the baby's hungry. Heck, I even have an emergency thing of formula at home just in case, and I ebf. Have you considered how stressful it probably is worrying about what they would do if you were 3 hours late? What if your car broke down or something? Or worse? I would give them the can of formula, ask them not to open it unless it was a real emergency, to tell you when they open it, and to call you on your cell phone before they do in case you are 2 blocks away. But that's just me.
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  • Angela814Angela814 member

    I agree with those who said I'd give them a few bags of frozen milk to keep or send an extra bottle.

    I would also be worried that they'd give formula instead of bm.  I know formula isn't bad or anything, but I was very adamant that DD didn't get any formula too.  I completely understand that statement.


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  • springtime81springtime81 member
    I would not give them formula unless you really don't care if they use it.  Because honestly, it sounds like they will if it's an "emergency" or not.  That's my prediction.  If I were in your shoes, I would just flat out tell them "NO" and I would also get some sort of note from the pedi that the baby is to receive breastmilk only.  My two cents :o)
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  • beb4bebbeb4beb member
    I say offend away...they may not understand your dedication to BF'ing and the whole demand/supply end of things.  Besides, DS won't starve to death if you are an hour late picking him up once in awhile.
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