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Babies: 0 - 3 Months
susanmosley
member
question re: babies "behavior" when left with family/babysitter
susanmosley
member
My baby is 5 1/2 months but I guess this question isn't age specific. She has been this way since 2 1/2 or 3 months.
She sees my parents about once a week and is left with one or both of them 1-2 times per month - for about 2 hours at a time. And, EVERY time (except once) she cries A LOT while we are gone. She is a very easy and happy baby with us, so this "behavior" is specific to being without us. It makes me feel bad for my parents and for her. In general, she is very cautious when people come over - watching very seriously instead of passing out the smiles left and right like she does with us. Even when they come over and spend time, she is very reserved and much more easily upset when they are playing with her and holding her.
How do your babies act with other people of similar familiarity? Thanks for your replies. This is stressing me out - although I know she is a baby and my parents love her and I probably shouldn't be giving it an extra thought.
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Re: question re: babies "behavior" when left with family/babysitter
My oldest son was like that. I remember posting asking if babies could get stranger anxiety at 3 months. He cried if anyone other than DH or I had him. Even my mom, who he saw a lot. I know everyone thought it must be because I was a freaky first time mom, but honestly, a lot of it was just him. He gradually got better over time. He's very good with people he knows now, but still reserved and a little slow to warm when it comes to strangers.
Just curious, do you SAH? I do, and I always wondered if that had something to do with it since he wasn't exposed to a lot of new people on a regular basis. I know he did a complete turn around after I started him in a mom's day out program at 15 months. He became much more outgoing after that.
DD is like this as well. We live 8 hours from family but my mom has seen DD at least once a month since she was born and we spent the whole month of Dec with my parents but the last time my mom came to visit DD totally freaked out at first. My grandma came with mom and DD had only seen her a couple times and even at the end of the week she was still shy with grandma but had warmed up a little to my mom.She is shy with anyone but my and DH.
BUT my DS will go to anyone and always has been that way. He talks to anyone and would rather be with my mom than with us. All kids are different.
Mrs. Hizzo - thanks. I do work. But as a speech therapist, I only leave for 2 hours at a time to go to someone's home for a session. And during those times, my DH is with her. So, basically I SAH.
You said it perfectly. I feel like I look like a crazy first time mom who has made my child this way, but I think it is her personality. And to compensate, my DH and I seem to try to get her to "perform" when her grandparents are around because we see all of the awesome things she does all day with us. Then she won't laugh, smile, play with her toys like she does, etc because she is too busy being observant. THEN I feel bad for trying to make her do her tricks! And lastly, I overanalyze entirely too much and post about it on thebump.