Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: Anyone go to appt's alone?
I do. My husband is in construction so if he takes time off its unpaid. He comes to u/s but the month appts he doesn't bother to.
Doesn't bother me, I'm in and out of there in like 15mins anyways...
BFP 3/9/12 Natural M/C 4/11/12
I'll go alone to the ones that don't involve an ultrasound.
DH doesn't need to be there while I pee in a cup & they weigh me.
I've gone alone once for blood work, otherwise DH has come with each time. However, now I think he'll start only coming for u/s visits or if there's an issue.
I think if you're comfortable going alone, that's the important thing.
Too bad we don't live closer =( We could do ours together!
My husband teaches at a high school and coaches football, which has already started conditioning. He doesn't want to tell them he can't make events because of the pregnancy yet. I told him to hold of and wait until the appt with the OB. I'm doing my early ultrasounds solo and will even be going by myself next week, when we're hoping to see a heartbeat.
My family lives up North but I honestly don't mind going alone. My husband is so supportive when we're together. I'm saving his free time and miss work for the bigger appointments.
ditto, what she said
i go alone to the majority of my appts! dh owns a restaurant and it is difficult for him to get away~ he came to the NT scan and i will bring him next week to hear the hearbeat (which he missed last time)~ and he will be going with me for the anatomy scan~ all the big ones...
as for the monthly appts- it's really not necessary for him to go along- the appts become very quick and monotonous (pee in cup, weight you, check bp, any questions? ok see you next month)-- haha so no need for him to waste his days off (save them for when the baby arrives!)
you may want to ask him ahead of time though what his family history is like regarding genetics- my doc did a brief question and answer sitting before the appt to screen for any genetic/inherited things like diabetes, defects, learning disabilities, heart problems, etc. (so if you are not aware of them already, then just double check with your dh before you go!)
GL and no worries! you will do fine going alone! many ppl go alone all the time!
I just went to an appointment today alone. I was totally OK with it. DH came to the first one b/c I knew we were getting an ultrasound. Most of the pg women I see in the waiting room are alone. Unless something big is happening, DH doesn't need to see me pee in a cup, get weighed in and see a Dr. for 5 minutes.
I would actually feel silly and really co-dependent if DH came to all of my appointments with me.
I highly recommend that you have someone at your 1st u/s, which for most people is between 8-10 weeks. And I would highly recommend this person be your husband, but at the very least someone.
I went to a lot of my appointments alone, and it didn't/doesn't bother me. But with my last pg they found I had a blighted ovum at the 1st u/s. (for those who don't know that means they saw the sac but there was no baby). I was there alone. I then had to drive myself home. Then I had to tell DH what had happened. It was the worst day of my life.
I hope that this never happens to anyone, and the chances are small, but I still recommend that you have someone with you just in case. And having someone to see the baby with you the first time is a wonderful thing.
This time we have made certain that DH will go with me to this appointment. Even if he goes to nothing else but the big u/s.
I went alone to my first appointment. DH really wanted to go, even though they didn't do anything exciting then. I had to book the appointment 4 weeks out and DH said he was going to tell his boss he would need to go in late that day. He kept forgetting and I kept reminding him. Until he got upset at the continued "nagging" so I stopped and trusted him to remember on his own. Guess what? he forgot. And his boss booked him a flight the morning of the appointment. Men! Now we laugh about it but I remind him that from now on the "nagging" will continue until he does something about it. lol. We have our first "real" appointment with the actual doctor on Monday, and he requested the morning off for it a few weeks ago and it has already been approved.
Surprisingly, they told DH, whatever time he needs off for appointments or whatever to let them know and they will work around it. They were more accomodating than I thought they would be. And DH is salary, so if all he does is go in to work late once a month or whatever, it won't affect his paycheck which is nice.