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Breastfeeding
I feel like a failure (longish)
I have extremely low milk supply, so I've been taking domperidone, fenugreek, blessed thistle, been pumping after every session, power pumping every few days, eating oatmeal, making lactation cookies, etc. ?I went to the breastfeeding specialist doctor yesterday and pretty much was told that I'm one of those rare people that just doesn't make breastmilk. ?I was never engorged and my breasts didn't grow at all during pregnancy or after. ?I still make milk, only about an 1/8 of an ounce at a time. ?They are doing some blood tests to see if it's hormonally or thyroid related. ?But most likely, that's the most BM I will ever get out of me. ?They've upped my domperidone intake and we're giving it two weeks to see if there's any increase. ?I no longer have to pump after feeding since DS milks me dry and there's no point (I had been pumping for 20 minutes after, barely getting 2 drops out) and I'm not supposed to pump between feedings because then I'm just stealing it from the next feeding. ?Blah. I'm having a pity party for myself. ?I'm glad I got some answers, I thought they were just going to go over my latch and tell me to keep doing what I was doing. ?Though I feel like ignorance was bliss, because now that I know I'm broken, I'm not so hopeful as before. ?Anyway, I plan on keeping up the BFing... but should I pump it out or still latch DS on? ?I even just got a My Brest Friend pillow. Sigh. ?Wah, wah, wah, whine, whine, whine. ?Thanks for listening.??
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Re: I feel like a failure (longish)
Don't be so hard on yourself. You have done all you can do. Of course any milk you can give him is good, so I would still have him latch (pumping is not as good for your supply as actual latching from your child) and supplement as need be.
Good luck!
Charlotte Ella 07.16.10
Emmeline Grace 03.27.13
Hi - I'm so sorry. I know exactly what you're going through - and you should know that you're not alone. I think a lot of us (well, I'm not counting people who can feed an army with one breast 24 hours after having a baby!) experience guilt over not being able to produce enough bm to keep our babies happy. BFing is supposed to be a nurturing and bonding experience, yet it can also cause a lot of stress - and it has here. I guess the most important thing is that you are doing everything you can to make sure that your little one gets what you can give him. For that reason, i think you should continue to have him latch on, just have a bottle ready once he's gotten all the bm.
Cheer up! A nurse at the hospital told me that a good mother is one who loves her child, not one that produces breastmilk. Keep that in mind
You're doing what you can and if that is 1/8 oz per day, it is 1/8 oz he wouldn't get if you weren't trying. It isn't a pity party, it is legitimate anguish over not being able to provide something for your child. And in this case, ignorance would not be bliss because your child would slowly starve. You know the answer. You know you can make some milk and you're trying to make more and you need to supplement to give your child the rest. Knowledge is power.
I'm so sorry you're going through this.
I am sorry you are going through this, but try not to be so hard on yourself...
Your job as a mother is to fee your baby.. and if it is not breast milk you have to do it by whatever means you can. Giving your DC a full tummy is the most important thing... I would keep BFing but just know that you are a great mother no matter what kind of mile he is getting!