How did you decide??

TheKitty · February 2009

We are having our big US on Wed... and I can NOT decide if we should find out the sex or not - every time I think I decide, I change my mind........

Was there anything that helped you make your decision to find out or not??

IselaCid · February 2009

I'm a control freak and must be able to plan ahead. The idea to not find out never even crossed my mind!

Augbaby2009 · February 2009

For us it was a mutual decision not to find out the sex. We want to be suprised.

My opinion. If you are this unsure maybe you shouldn't find out just yet. You can always change your mind later. But if you find out now, and then change your mind, there is no going back.

chrissyellen · February 2009

I will find out a.s.a.p. just to make baby showers easier, room decor, etc. I just imagin things will be easier.

Mrs_mam · February 2009

I figured having a baby is surprising enough, and no matter when you do find out it will still be a surprise, so we are definitely finding out. It will also help us choose a name since that's the only gender-specific thing we are doing.

thatgirlang · February 2009

Well, DH made my mind up for me when he said HELL NO to waiting... LOL

If you still haven't decided by Weds have the u/s tech seal the results and you can decide later what to do.

eclipsed823 · February 2009

I just knew that it would drive me crazy not knowing for so long, especially knowing that I could know if that makes any sense.

christana08 · February 2009

You could have your dr/tech write the sex on a card and put it in an envelope. Then when you decide you want to know, you can open the envelope.

saj&jaj · February 2009

DH and I decided right away that we wanted to know-nothing really helped us make the decision, we just know that the suspense would kill us!

water-fairy · February 2009

It wasn't too hard for us, we just knew we wanted to know... we still don't, waiting on our big u/s, but it's only a matter of time.

I will love shopping when I know what I'm buying for. Honestly I hate those gender neutral things, they are mostly boyish anyway and everything is limited.?

war_eagle · February 2009

I've gotten really stubborn! ?So many people have said "Oh, you'll cave and find out" that I am determined not too. ?LOL

I just think it is a rare chance to have the experience of "It's a ___" in the delivery room and to get to share all kinds of fun news when the baby is born. ?

That being said, there are lots of great reasons to find out at the ultrasound, but none of them outweighed my reasons for wanting to wait for me.?

margeincharge2 · February 2009

Well, we haven't had our big u/s yet but we will be finding out the sex of the baby. For us, the main thing is that we want to be able to plan ahead of time. Everyone says it's a surprise to find out when you give birth, but it's a surprise when you see it on the u/s too. Giving birth will be enough of a surprise for me. So I want to know. And DH agrees with me on it.

thejenni · February 2009

We didnt find out. The last couple weeks of my pregnancy I thought the suspense would kill me! It was worth it when the doctor said "its a girl". DH was so proud to call his parents to tell them "I have a daughter!". We had a girl and boy name picked out too.

As far as planning ahead, we had enough neutral onesies and sleepers to make it thru the first couple weeks and soon as family and friends heard we were having a girl, we got ALOT of clothes. My shower was after DD was born.

It a hard choice! I hope some of the opinions here help!

JCM052707 · February 2009

IselaCid:
I'm a control freak and must be able to plan ahead. The idea to not find out never even crossed my mind!

Ditto. Plus, even though I won't do totally blue or pink, I wanted to be able to buy some things that were for one or the other.

I also want to be able to call the baby by "he" or "she" or their name, not "it".

Future Mrs.Qualls · February 2009

IselaCid:
I'm a control freak and must be able to plan ahead. The idea to not find out never even crossed my mind!

MEE TOO!! Haha!

megpyes · February 2009

Sealing the results in a card is a good idea... We just couldn't wait. We would've found out the moment we knew we were pregnant if we could.

jolis_petits_bijoux · February 2009

margeincharge2:
Well, we haven't had our big u/s yet but we will be finding out the sex of the baby. For us, the main thing is that we want to be able to plan ahead of time. Everyone says it's a surprise to find out when you give birth, but it's a surprise when you see it on the u/s too. Giving birth will be enough of a surprise for me. So I want to know. And DH agrees with me on it.

Ditto. The whole "surprise" philosophy is lost on me, because it's a surprise up until the point at which you find out, whether that's at the big U/S or at the birth. Unless one is a psychic and can "sense" the sex of her unborn children, it truly is a surprise either way!

That said, I have heard from people who waited that it was a tremendous motivating factor during labor. I can see how having the excitement of not knowing would really give you something to look forward to finding out at delivery! For me, wanting to know in advance and plan, and not wanting unisex stuff snuffed out the feelings of "maybe we shouldn't find out" right away.

Also, I feel like I've really bonded with baby Junebug more, knowing that he's a boy. That's not to say I would have bonded any less if I didn't know what he was - this is my first PG, so I can't say. All I know is it's fun to refer to him as "he" instead of "it", to call him "little buddy", etc.

So, to the OP, I'd say if you're not sure if you want to know, don't ask the U/S tech to tell you - once she does, you can't take it back! Smile Like PP's suggested, I'd have her write it down and put it in an envelope. Then, if you decide that you want to find out, you can open it.

The New Mrs. · February 2009

I never really had to make a choice - I've always been pro finding out. 1-I can't keep something like that hidden from me for that long 2-I'm a control freak (as pp mentioned) and I needed to know so I could register for things in blue or pink, paint the nursery, buy lots of cozy blankets and have everything else ready in a specific color and 3-shopping! I could hardly resist not buying anything for the first 16 weeks, much less continuing. I personally don't like the yellow or green things. My baby will be bald as can be like me (til I was 4!!) so I definitely need blue or pink outfits to identify ; ) The shopping has been the best part so far! DH plays guitar (his second love) and it's been so much fun buying little "rock star" things for our baby. I would've bought them if we had a girl too, but it would've been pink stuff instead.

Suparstarz714 · February 2009

I wanted to know all along but the fact that I am SOO tired of green and yellow... and there really isn't much out there gender neutral has added to fact that I JUST NEED to know.

DH asked the other day, "but honey what if I don't want to know?" and I said "that is fine but I HAVE to know, so I just won't tell you."

Which he would find out when I buy pink or blue paint LoL... but he wants to know too..

Tinkermeg · February 2009

Finding out the sex really helped DH and I bond with our baby. Now we call her by her name and talk to her. It made it more real and we are able to visualize the little girl wearing the cute little dresses we have been stocking up on.

wilson_ashlyn · February 2009

We new from the get-go that we wanted to find out. We both are planners, and wanted everything to be ready for the baby when he came.

liongish119 · February 2009

We wanted to be able to narrow names down to one gender and also to know whether we could buy frilly things

*blondie* · February 2009

IselaCid:
I'm a control freak and must be able to plan ahead. The idea to not find out never even crossed my mind!

ditto! My advice would be to have your dr./nurse/tech write it down in an envelope and you can decide whether you want to look or not.

kyoto · February 2009

If you're not sure, you can always have the tech write it down and put it in an envelope for you. Then you can decide if you want to open it when you're in private. That's what we did, though it didn't quite work out right this last time.

BadaBing327 · February 2009

We never not thought to find out at the big u/s so it wasn't an issue for us. It will be just as much of a surprise at 20 weeks than it will be at delivery. You'll still get the excitement of finding out what and who the baby looks like at delivery.

jenn0717 · February 2009

The thought of NOT finding out when we have our big u/s never even crossed our minds. I will not buy anything big for the baby (bedding, stroller, clothes, etc.) until I do find out the sex of the baby. I think knowing will also make me feel closer to the baby so I can stop referring to it as an "it" or simply the baby.

Temp984666312503071 · February 2009

For me it was about connecting to the baby and being able to call it he or she and by name.

I have had a few losses and tend to emotionally distance myself because I worry so much. I found out yesterday that we are expecting a baby girl and I already feel like I am bonding more with the baby being able to call her by name and say "she ......." instead of "the baby......". I think it is healthier for me to know if that makes sense!

It is definitely a personal decision but I am so happy I know it is a girl .

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