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MrsLeanna
member
s/o Melly's Post - are you closer to your sibling's kids, than DH's siblings?
MrsLeanna
member
Ok, I ask this b/c I'm an only child and therefore don't have any brothers or sisters who will one day be pregnant and make me an aunt. But my DH has a sister who has 2 kids and I'm an aunt to them.
(Not to pick on you Mel) - but in her post she said she's going to be an aunt. But she already is an aunt to her SILs 2 kids. So, I'm just wondering if anyone else is in that situation so you feel closer to your nieces / nephews who are your siblings kids, or does it make no difference?
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Re: s/o Melly's Post - are you closer to your sibling's kids, than DH's siblings?
i'm on mel's boat - no nieces or nephews - i also agree with her natural reaction
in the end kids are kids and i would love them unconditionally either way - but instincts will probably drive me closer to my sister's kids.
*gasp* Are you picking on me Leanna?! ;-)
Yes - I am already technically an Aunt by marriage because my SIL and BIL have 2 babies and a third on the way but this child will be my first blood niece or nephew and my sister's child and therefore, yes, more special to me because of that.
I don't think this should make you sad. I love my ILs kids to death (terrors that they are) and am proud to be their aunt but this new baby will be my baby sister's baby. Maybe being an only child yourself its not as easy for you to understand and I can try to explain. I grew up with my sister. We shared a room. It was always just the two of us and we are especially close so I would think that any child of hers would be that much more special than those of ILs who I am not as close to.
The day Sophia was born I was away from her most of the day because I had a c-section. My sister got to watch my baby through a window for hours and was overjoyed. But, as she tells it, nothing compared to the moment my sister, for the first time, watched Sophia placed into my arms. She burst into an emotional rush of tears. I have been as emotional about my sister's pregnancy in a way I was never emotional about my SIL's. I just cannot explain it. She is my blood.
Why? Marc's sister probably feels the same way about Alexis vs any of her husband's sibling's kids. I think its very natural.
I think everyone and every family is different...
I have one niece from Laz's brother. She is 19 years old and in college. I met her when she was 8. I absolutely love her.. (I didn't know her as a baby though... ;-( )
If my brother in law's new wife was to have a baby, I would be that baby's tia, but it wouldn't be the same as when my sisters have babies- why? Because my sister in law and I are not close (at all). Would I love that baby- YES, but it just wouldnt be the same...
For example- she (my sister in law) came over and saw MY baby once (my baby is technically her niece). They live 10 minutes away so it's not the distance... My sisters on the other hand come visit Nadia a few times a week.
My sisters are my best friends in the entire world. When they have babies I know I am going to love them like they were MY babies.
I think it's all abotu how close you are to your sister in law really... If you are super close then I think it will be just like if they were your sisters babies...
My siblings don't have kids yet (they are in their early 20's) but I don't feel I will love their kids (or be more or less close) than DH's sisters kids. To me a child is a child and family is family.
Ditto...
My sister and I are best friends, we grew up doing everything and sharing everything together. I know I'll be ecstatic when she has her kids, I'm already pushing her to have them, lol. And I know ill be ecstatic when any one of my SIL's has kids, but like other people said its different. I will love them all but a bond is a bond and I know my kids and my sisters kids will be raised like brothers and sisters, not cousins. Either way I can't wait to have nieces/nephews from any side!!!
-j
It makes me sad not b/c of the bond, but because I won't have that.
Yes, my SIL and I are very close and I love those kids unconditionally.
On the other hand, I am extremely close with my cousins and we were raised like brothers and sisters so I assume that when they have kids - a long time from now - the oldest is 22, followed by 15 - that I will have a special bond with them. I can see the bond that my aunts and my cousins have with Alexis and yes it is special.
My Blog: SIREN.ORG!
I'm an aunt by marriage too of 2 (3 soon). My sisters are a LONG way from having children. Honestly, I view my niece / nephew almost like my own! Sounds weird, but DH and I love them so much... we are very close to them. I would imagine I'd be just as close to my "real" nieces / nephews in the future... only time will tell.
My mom had a lot of marriage nieces / nephews which all love her as a real aunt... but she's def a lot closer to her sister's son than she is to some of my other cousins.
"If we couldn't laugh we would all go insane" -- Jimmy Buffett
Yup, like people said its only natural. However i treat them all the same and want nothing but the best for all of them.
My sister feels the same way about me and Jonathan.
I'm not going to be any help because I have a half brother with 2 kids but DH has no siblings so no kids there. but it's a good question
xoxo