WTF is up with DS?

lilacladybug

DS is 4 years old. I have the HARDEST time getting him to work on letters and numbers with me, and only about 20-30% of the time will he correctly tell me the name or sound of a letter (unless I say it first). Don't get me wrong - I don't push anything, but I will occasionally point to a word somewhere and ask him to show me the letter a or whatever. But it's a huge struggle - he'll get it right once and then won't be able to identify or tell me what it is if I ask him again. Add this to his Pre-K teacher a couple of months ago telling me she noticed some "attention issues" which I had been suspecting, in addition to his obvious hyperactivity. So we've been working on it more lately. But he still isn't getting it.

 So then I talked to his teacher today and asked her how he was doing academically. Her response? "Honestly, he's one of the better ones in our class. He knows his letters and numbers, he's working on numbers after 20 when the other kids are working on 10-20, and he writes his name." 

 WTF? Why is my little snot doing all that for his teachers at school and pulling the wool over our eyes at home? I have been obsessing over how I'm going to approach learning letters and numbers based on a kinesthetic learning style, I have materials and programs and books up the yin-yang, but it's a struggle to get him to tell me "a says AH." And it truly isn't that we're pushing anything at home - maybe 3 times a week I spend about 5-10 minutes going over a few (4 or 5) letters and sounds with him. 

 Is it just that he is truly SO strong willed that he doesn't want to do it just because he doesn't want to do it? I am so confused! Help!

buffalo_buckeye

I don't have an answer for you but I wanted to say I have noticed similar behavior to your ds in mine.  He doesn't know his letters yet (so I think), but like you, we have pointed out letters in pretzels that are letters and sometimes he will say "what's this one"...I swear he only gets them right every once in a while (like O or A or but just guesses after that.  About a week ago we played with a new alphabet puzzle at the library and he knew all but about 3-4.  ????  But then a few days later...just guessing again.

Also with puzzles sometimes he will play with the puzzle and get every one right first try very quickly.  Then two seconds later he will try a piece and move it around the right spot and say "nope, doesn't fit" .  It's like he knows it goes there, but is 'challenging' himself? 

Sometimes I think he isn't really listening to stories and then out of the blue he will have the whole thing memorized...like 30-40 sentences! 

I think that you must be doing something right if the teacher says he is doing so well.  I would just keep up with it and I bet he will pick up on more than you even know! 

lilacladybug

OMG, Buffalo, that is EXACTLY what DS is doing. You could have been talking about Alex. It is so nice to hear that I'm not the only one. I've been so worried about this and now I'm wondering if I really need to worry or if he is just being a little snot and not wanting to share what he knows with us. He's the kind of smarty-pants manipulator - don't ever tell me 4 year olds don't try to manipulate their parents - who would do something like that too. Even if it doesn't make it better, hearing about someone else having the same issues helps. Thx!

KellyMichelle

My DS is the same way.  He did the same thing with colors and shapes and I suspect he can identify at least some numbers and letters, but he won't do it.  It seems like he would want to, but he would rather just keep his knowledge to himself. The joys of children!

 

buffalo_buckeye

 He's the kind of smarty-pants manipulator -

This is mh.  And I'm guessing ds will be just like him  

Is your ds on the shy side?  Just curious.  When ds was in dc he was always the shy mama's boy, and they said he just listened and watched everything.  But they said he would just out of the blue throw out sentences and phrases/concepts that some of the older kids didn't understand yet.  Just wondering if this is another similar personality trait that goes along with it.

Angela814

Maybe since he knows them already he's just bored when you try to go over them with him again.  I think it's crazy how different kids behave at daycare than they do at home.  It just doesn't make sense logically.