Stay at Home Moms

My LO and the family

My LO cries whenever he is around my family or DHs family also. He doesnt see them very often. He clings to dh and I for dear life when he's around them. My family tends to shower him with attention and he doesn't like it and cries. I've noticed that he needs to warm up to people and I'm the same way. My sister made a comment to and annoyed me. She said that my LO needs to spend time around other people besides me all of the time. I agree with her but the issue is that no one from my family wants to babysit him but yet they complain that he's always crying around them. It is because he doesn't really know them. My sister has me worried that he is lacking social skills and she said he's a mamas boy.  Btw he is fine with the moms of his play mates and other people that he sees frequently. Is it normal for him to behave this way around my family? He's 15 months old.

Re: My LO and the family

  • Can you take him to see your family more often without having them baby sit? If he's never around them he's never going to get to know them. I take DS to visit my parents all the time but they don't baby sit.

    If the problem is that they are  overwhelming him with hugs and kisses, tell them to back off a little.


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  • I do think it's normal. I really wouldn't worry too much. I'd let family know that he needs to warm up hope they are okay with sitting next to you on the couch or something.

    My kids were the same the younger 2 still are shy around new people they are 5 3.
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  • I do think its normal though for kids to get shy. DS is almost  3.5 and he's just getting to a point where he will willingly interact with people. He does still get shy though. 

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  • imageQueSyrah:

    Can you take him to see your family more often without having them baby sit? If he's never around them he's never going to get to know them. I take DS to visit my parents all the time but they don't baby sit.

    If the problem is that they are  overwhelming him with hugs and kisses, tell them to back off a little.

    They claim to be so busy when I want to visit or invite them over to visit. I don't ask them to babysit I just find it annoying tht they tease him about being a mamas boy but don't make time to have a relationship with him. My family gathers for holidays and birthdays and that's when they see him and make the comments. It's so annoying.

  • ta78ta78 member
    DS still has to warm up around people even if he sees them regularly. He has gotten a little better in the last year, but he can still be pretty shy at times. For awhile he would even do it to his grandparents that he sees 3x a week.





    Q :  06.25.10
    W : 01.11.13

    #3 : due 11.02.15

  • imageblushingbride_08:
    imageQueSyrah:

    Can you take him to see your family more often without having them baby sit? If he's never around them he's never going to get to know them. I take DS to visit my parents all the time but they don't baby sit.

    If the problem is that they are  overwhelming him with hugs and kisses, tell them to back off a little.

    They claim to be so busy when I want to visit or invite them over to visit. I don't ask them to babysit I just find it annoying tht they tease him about being a mamas boy but don't make time to have a relationship with him. My family gathers for holidays and birthdays and that's when they see him and make the comments. It's so annoying.



    I would just be honest with them. Tell them he would be more open and friendly if he knew them better. Then tell them you would like to see them more often too and suggest a time to get together.
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  • 2-Step2-Step member

    I think 15 months is a little early to worry about this. He is a baby and he has only known his immediate family. Normal reaction would be to be intimidated and slow to warm up to a larger crowd of people you see a few times a year. He will be fine and if they truly want a relationship with your son then they can develop one by spending real one on one time with him.

    If they make a comment I would say- well he is not a mamas boy around people he knows well, just crowds of people he doesn't see often. I'd love it if you came over to spend some time with us when it's not such a big crowd, so he can get to know you better. Leave it at that. 

    You have to remember that time goes a lot more slowly to kids and babies. A month to them is a significant portion of their life, so not seeing someone for a month is like a year to us.  

     

  • At 15 months I think this is pretty normal behavior.  If he doesn't see them often, then he doesn't really know them and it's probably scary for him.

    From about 12 - 18 months my DD would freak out around anyone she did not know and would cling to me for dear life.  She would cry if they came near or talked to her until she was around them for a while.  She wouldn't let me put her down either.   She grew out of it around 18 months.  She's still a little leery around new people until she gets to know them but she doesn't cry anymore or cling to me. 

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  • I would think it is a stage. Maybe visit more often for short periods of time?
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  • My LO screamed bloody murder at the very sight of MIL and couldn't even be held by MIL for the first 2 years of her life, just now, she will occasionally go over to her. Oh well lol. MIL is very hands off and more focused on cooking her dinners then actually being hands on, playing with LO, etc. She's weird though LO never seemed to care for most of DH's family for that matter and I think it's a case of not seeing them often and who knows what else.

    LO immediately bonded to my family though and has always been great around them, even with going long periods without seeing them. LO has been home with me since birth and only babysat for by my mother occasionally as a baby, but not at this age anymore.

     

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