July 2013 Moms

What to send a grieving friend?

My long time friend lost her grandfather today. I don't get to see her often because I live 8hours away but we are very close and text multiple times daily and hang out monthly. Being 8plus months pregnant I won't be seeing her for a couple months now but would like to send her something. I don't want to send flowers or fruit basket because i personally didn't like receiving flowers for deaths and also she is jewish so its not customary to send flowers. She loves massage envy so I could send her a gift card for an extra massage to help her relax. Do you ladies have any ideas or suggestions?
Thanks in advance

Re: What to send a grieving friend?

  • Maybe gift cards for dinner since its not something you can personally offer at the moment.
  • imagetheblairwitch01:
    Maybe gift cards for dinner since its not something you can personally offer at the moment.


    This is what I was going to say too.
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  • I like that idea. Thank you
  • When we day shiva for my FIL, the best gifts sent were the edible arrangement fruits. Worst were gift baskets with books on grieving and coffee/tea.

    The fruit thing was well recieved because we had a house filled with cake, cookies, and candy....

  • spb27spb27 member
    Usually during shiva, you are not supposed to cook for yourself. Maybe you can have a restaurant that is nearby your friend have food sent over.
  • I really think just a card is very thoughtful. When my grandmother passed, i was most touched by the kind words that people thought to send in cards. It really is the thought that counts in this situation.
  • Good points. I plan to send her family who is sitting shiva fruit or a veggie dip platter from a kosher deli nearby. But id like to also send my friend something personal for her. Thanks for the responses.
  • I would feel a little weird if someone sent me a massage gift card for a death in the family; seems too self indulgent during a time of grief.  

    I would write a sincere sympathy card and make a donation to a charity (whether favorite or a relevant charity) in honor of the deceased.   

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