Toddlers: 24 Months+

Suggestions for potty training a strong willed child - sorry it's long

DS#1 really spoiled us when it came to potty training so it feels like we got an extra challenge with DD (27 months). She is very strong willed child which we can normally handle but the issue of potty training has us baffled. She has gone pee in the potty many times over the past 4-5 months or so, sometimes she tells us she has to go and sometimes we ask and put her on the potty. She has never gone poop on the potty. We have put her in underwear, which she likes to wear but she does have accidents in it a little less than half the time she wears them. The problem is that she mostly knows when she needs to pee. She has on multiple occasions taken off either her underwear or diaper and peed on the floor (these have been times when one of us was not in the room with her like during nap/quiet time or while playing in the playroom). She also has taken her diaper off after pooping and bring it to us if we don't notice the moment that she has pooped. If she is in her room when she does this, she will put on underwear and just leave the poopy diaper on the floor (luckily she doesn't play with it!) and not tell us. She will poop in her underwear if she is wearing them too. Othertimes she poops in the diaper and could care less that it's there and keep on about her business. I don't know where to go from here. We have never pushed the potty training and I'm not in a rush (although being back to only the baby in diapers would be nice on the family budget) but this is driving me nuts and I'm dreading the day that she stashes her poopy diaper somewhere we can't find it! Any suggestions??? TIA

Re: Suggestions for potty training a strong willed child - sorry it's long

  • Stick to one - diapers or underwear.  Don't go back and forth.  (Honestly, if she won't reliably use the underwear, I would say stick with diapers for a few more months.)  And then make sure she can't get out of her diapers - maybe use cloth diapers with snaps (my 3 year old can't reliably undo them) or maybe duct tape the diaper?  Then great, she tells you she's pooped and you change her diaper, but until she's willing to use the potty, the diaper stays on?

    That's probably what I would have done in that situation.  We have waited until DD was 3, and she was more mentally ready. It's been fairly easy, and we've mostly left her to it.  (She even makes me leave the room when she's peeing and pooping.)  But this would not have happened even three months ago.

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  • Sounds like life with DD over the past year. 

    We had a potty available in both of our bathrooms and asked if she would like to use it in the morning, post nap and pre bed.

    In the mornings we asked if she wanted to wear a diaper or panties. Up until a couple of months ago she always picked a diaper. I don't know what changed her mind but one morning she woke up, decided she wanted panties and has been wearing them ever sine- with next to no accidents. 

    So basically we let our strong willed child make the choice to potty train, instead of us doing it for her. Once she decided she was ready that was it, she was ready and with zero set backs.

    I was actually pretty anti potty training until after this LO's arrival, so I'm anxious to see how she does once the baby arrives.  

    DD1 4.14.10
    DD2 8.22.13
    MMC 1.4.17 at 16w
    Expecting #3, EDD 1.29.18

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  • You pretty much just described my DS1. Monday I finally had enough of the yes I want to no I don't when he decided during nap time to take his pull up off and get potty in his Noah's ark toy: Gross! I just took his pull ups away. Told him that it was time he wore his underwear that his pull ups would be for bed time until they were gone but mommy was done buying them for him. We struggle with multiple accidents for a couple of days, today he had one accident and has faithful gone to the bathroom every time he had to go. We started only having one accident on Thursday and then it was like a switch mommy I have to go potty off to the bathroom he would go.

    Anyway my suggestion would be if you are really ready to put it just do it. Good luck honey

    Please forgive the spelling and grammar errors. I am bumping from mobile
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  • Sounds like she might be afraid of pooping on the potty, something your going to have to help her with. But I wouldn't go back and forth. Successful potty training is usually accomplished by completely ditching the diapers
  • At 27 months I'd just let it go and wait - she's probably not quite ready and it's senseless to stress yourself out.

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  • Sounds like my toddler too.  Although she is 29 months she goes back and forth with potty and no potty, wanting to wear underwear but then having accidents.  I know she is ready because she tells her teachers and goes all of the time at daycare.  Home has just been a problem.  I think we are going to try a better reward system this month for going on the potty at home.  If that doesn't do it, we'll take a break.  

    Peanut 1.23.11 ~ Bean 9.06.12 ~ Little Boy 9.24.14
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