DH brought up adoption

AprilDrew04

So we had this conversation a few months ago, and he had told me that he didn't think he ever wanted to adopt.  But just the other night after watching a movie - he brings up the idea.  I mean I am all for it.  But just really surprised me.  

We have a lot of decisions to make and lots of research to do.  I'm not done with IF treatments yet.  But while I wait for AF to show up, I can do some research on international adoption.  He thinks he wants to adopt from Africa.  I've always been all for adoption, but would prefer to adopt a younger child or set of siblings.

Anyone else had this conversation? 

Sharon216

We've talked about it and although DH and I are both open to it, the thought of starting a whole new process is pretty daunting.  I really want to carry another child so we plan to exhaust all our options for a child of our own before we decide to seriously consider adoption.

MJC1116

DH and I have had this conversation many times. While we are both on board, I think he is a little ahead of me. I have some reservations... mainly the emotional turmoil that many go through. My sister and her husband were in the process of adopting an infant and just as quickly as they received him, they lost him to another family (who had previously adopted the baby's sibling). Also, I'm worried about the affects of adopting and already having a biological child with my husband - not for me, but from that child's point of view as he/she grows up knowing that. I would hope that our parenting would prevent that from ever becoming an issue. 

Like pp, I'm not ready to give up on carrying my own child. I hope that we can go through all the options to make that happen one last time prior to going the adoption route. I'm starting to feel that maybe I'll come to terms with OAD before that...  

mrsbnlmel

I think adoption is a wonderful thing, but I can't imagine a scenario in which we could afford it. It's just so very expensive. We've talked about it at length and would be supportive otherwise. I had severe ppd and complications during my pregnancy, now 2IF. Adoption almost seems like the perfect solution for us, other than the money.

I just know we couldn't do foster care adoption and it's all we could afford.  Again I think it's wonderful and God bless the people who do it, but I work very closely with the system and I know I'm not emotionally capable of going through that process. I think we will just choose to be OAD if treatments don't work for us. But never say never I guess

roughkat

We've talked about it as well.  In fact, before we even started our family we'd talked about the possibility of adopting.  My younger brother was adopted from Korea and DH's mother was adopted, so that has been a part of our lives forever.  But it's hard when you aren't ready to give up on having biological children.  

 Like I said, we are open to adoption and will probably pursue it in one way or another if TTC #2 becomes too hard (emotionally, physically, or financially), but we'd have to mourn the loss of having another biological child first, and that is so hard.

kofmkg

I was surprised how open DH was to adoption.  We are moving to a new home this summer/fall and once we are in place, we are starting the application process.  Excited about it!