2u2, A Cautionary Tale

chardonnay24

I agreed to babysit my 13 month old niece today. We'll call her M. A and M are 15 months apart and she is mobile, but I figured I could handle it. I had lots of things planned. A trip to the library! A walk around downtown! An afternoon play date!

Things were going according to plan. Both kids had fun this morning, there was only one incident of beating with a whisk. They both ate a healthy lunch. I even managed to give A a bath this morning.

A was in his room winding down so I decide to feed M a bottle. She falls asleep. I feel cocky. I am a baby whisperer.

I decide to get her one more blanket.

I go into the A's bedroom and WHAT IS THAT SMELL?

 

WHAT IS THAT WIPED ALL OVER THE WALLS?

 

I flip on the light and BAM - poop everywhere.

 

All over A, all over the walls, all over the bed, on his pillow and half his animals. ON HIS MOUTH. I ask him it he ate poop. "Yes", he replies without hesitation.

 

M is peacefully asleep in the guest bathroom so I decide to give A a shower in the master. I ask him to walk into the shower but don't notice him touching everything on the way in. Now there in a poop trail from his room to ours.

 

I get him clean, change the sheets, wipe down the walls and tell him to go to sleep. He screams "NO!" and charges past me into the hallway and yells, "UP AND DOWN UP AND DOWN UP AND DOWN WHOA OH OH" while jumping right outside the guest bath.

 

M wakes up and starts crying.

 

I give up and go sit in a corner, rock back and forth, cry, and think about how hungry I am because I haven't had lunch yet. And yet I'm covered in food. Ironic. Perhaps I should lick my shirt? Wait, it might be poop.

 

The end.

chardonnay24

BostonKisses2:

Poop smearing is a nightmare scenario for me.

He has never done this before! I think he must be punishing me for having the baby over today.

chardonnay24

krptcmschfmkr128:

I'm sorry....

I'm laffin, but I'm sorry, too. For laughing and for what you went through.

I'm chuckling now. Now that it's over.

isacdimi10

BostonKisses2:

Poop smearing is a nightmare scenario for me.

Have a nice, big drink tonight.  Sounds like you deserve it! 

This!

My DD once touched her brothers poop during a diaper change and according to DH I shrieked like a crazy person.  So far no one in my house has touched poop again. Though I still have flashbacks to when I worked in the nursing home and I had a case with poop smearing.

ReeseFox

chardonnay24:

 I ask him it he ate poop. "Yes", he replies without hesitation.

This is where I started laughing. I'm sorry though, that sounds crappy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(I'm sorry I couldn't resist.) Really, though that sucks.

MrsGoodkat

Ahh that sounds horrific. I give 2u2 Moms major props. I'd have to be institutionalized.

KJmashup

That's some good storytelling, there. Also, I'm sorry this happened. But I'm still laughing.

Libby1978

It's time for an afternoon drink IMO.  None of my kids ever did poop painting, but my younger sister did several times.  And some of those times I was babysitting her.

thebanich

Mine are 16 months apart.. I'm still drinking.

 

My 5 year old cousin still poops in her underwear occasionally and will hide it in her room for her mother to find days later.

kcisthebombdotcom

Naturally your kid will pick the day you're watching another kid to become Picasso with poo. Toddlers are small douches. 

Im sorry to laugh hysterically at your expense, 

bugandbibs

Oh my!

Maebb

KC_13:

Naturally your kid will pick the day you're watching another kid to become Picasso with poo. Toddlers are small douches.nbsp;Im sorry to laugh hysterically at your expense,nbsp;

"Picasso with poo," ha ha.

OP, sorry for your day. That sounds pretty horrifying! I just have a 6 month old DS, and now I'm pretty scared for the future.

Mrs.V

Oh brutal! Mine are 16 months apart. Thankfully, I didn't experience that! The first year is just a blur to me now...

wiggyslilsis

I need to show this to DH when he gets home. I have pretty much convinced him to wait on TTC 2. I think this would seal the deal haha. I told him I am scared to have a newborn and a toddler but I am terrified of having two toddlers! He was all for 2u2

lindsay.lou

Mercifully, DS1 has only done the poop grab and smear ONE time. Once was enough. It was horrifying. Lets just say the poop was not solid.

MrsCodeMonkey

I laughed so hard. Sounds terrible! DD covered her crib in poop one day. Now that she's in a toddler bed, I'm scared about a repeat incident with a much larger coverage.

FormerlyKrista555

Been there, done that.   It made me really regret the beautiful detail on my son's crib rails.

And, for what it's worth,  IMO babysitting an additional child to your one child,  is way harder than when they are both your own.

proudworkingmom82

Yikes thank God I only have one, but in all honesty I am so sorry you had to go through that, sounds awful!