"no gifts please" - baby shower — The Bump
October 2013 Moms

"no gifts please" - baby shower

so a friend of mine really wants to throw me a baby shower, but i really don't want gifts. i will have 2u2, and #1 was team green, so i literally have all the basics (i have a/s thursday, and will find out what we are having this time). we've already bought car seat#2, we bed-share (no crib), we cloth diaper (don't need any)..

i know the word "shower" is used to "shower the mom/baby with gifts"...so what's a better term? i've heard sprinkle, but that still implies gift giving. "celebration of upcoming baby" sounds dumb. i need your collective creative minds, please!

i don't want to do lunch/dinner "out", but want pretty much a traditional baby shower (snacks, mingling, maybe a game or two), with no gifts.

FWIW, i want/need it to be before the baby is here bc in chinese culture we do a specific meet-the-baby party, that the parents (me and h) host, and we will be sticking to that tradition.





Re: "no gifts please" - baby shower

  • I would suggest a meet the baby party. Have your friend word the invite to sound more like a gathering than a party and then include a line saying "no gifts please".

    ETA: never mind, just read your last sentence.

  • imagecarriet2018:
    I just got a "no gifts please" invitation to a bday party. I am so confused as to what to do haha. it is just really weird for me to go to a party without bring something. and what if some other people bring a gift anyways....I will feel like a dbag. if you want to do it this way, by all means. but I am just letting you know from a guest perspective it is really confusing on what the "proper" thing to do it.

     

    if i saw this on an invite, i'd probably just bring a card. i don't think it's that difficult....i hope it's not that difficult! 



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  • I'd just keep it simple and call it a "Celebrate Baby Party" or something. Maybe a "Bun in the Oven BBQ". lol

    But please don't specifically mention no gifts.  I personally find that a bit off-putting.  Just don't use the word shower or mention a registry.  I'm sure you will still get some gifts, but that's their choice.

     

  • imagecarriet2018:
    imagejennlin:

    imagecarriet2018:
    I just got a "no gifts please" invitation to a bday party. I am so confused as to what to do haha. it is just really weird for me to go to a party without bring something. and what if some other people bring a gift anyways....I will feel like a dbag. if you want to do it this way, by all means. but I am just letting you know from a guest perspective it is really confusing on what the "proper" thing to do it.

     

    if i saw this on an invite, i'd probably just bring a card. i don't think it's that difficult....i hope it's not that difficult! 

    well I guess it is the person I got this invitation from. she is very stuck up. I have had a conversation with a couple of the invited guests and we all feel the same way. we are not really sure what she wants or expects. but either way I still feel weird about not bringing something but like Kimbo said it is the guests choice.

    You could just bring some flowers or something edible, depending on what kind of party it was, if you really don't want to show up empty handed. If the party is at some type of public venue and says no gifts, then I would trust that she means she wants no gifts. 

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  • I'd still bring a small gift. That's just how I roll.
  • What about diaper party?
  • My thought has always been that putting "no gifts" on an invite is a little tacky. If your friend would like to throw your party, perhaps you could let her know your wishes. That way, without any registry information on the invite, people will pick up on the fact that you just want a nice gathering. However, there will always be those that insist on gift giving regardless.

     


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  • I love the idea of "Before baby BBQ"  Or just say BBQ and have friends over before the baby arrives. That way people will just bring something to eat or drink and have a great time.
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  • imagebabysteps23:
    imagekimbo1216:

    I'd just keep it simple and call it a "Celebrate Baby Party" or something. Maybe a "Bun in the Oven BBQ". lol

    But please don't specifically mention no gifts.  I personally find that a bit off-putting.  Just don't use the word shower or mention a registry.  I'm sure you will still get some gifts, but that's their choice.

     

    I agree with this.  I love giving gifts so I would regardless of your instructions lol.  I'm sure others like giving as well! 

    I love the "bun in the oven BBQ" idea! And I also think that putting "no gifts please" brings more attention to the gift giving/not gift giving then just leaving it off and focusing on the BBQ. 

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  • imageWino0920:
    What about diaper party?

    Haha.  You must have missed the flaming the O13 board got for anyone thinking these are okay. lol.  That was actually my confession last week.  I had not clue until that post that a diaper shower was considered tacky.  oops.

  • a shower for baby #3??  gifts or not, *Cringeeeeeeeeee

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  • imageFlutterby00:
    I love the "bun in the oven BBQ" idea! And I also think that putting "no gifts please" brings more attention to the gift giving/not gift giving then just leaving it off and focusing on the BBQ. 

    Thanks.  And yep. For DD's 2nd birthday party we just had, it tripled as a birthday party/house warming/baby 2.0 sex reveal.  I didn't actually call it a house warming.  I just said come see our new home and help us celebrate.  I still had a few people bring a small house warming gift.  We even got a couple of gifts for baby 2.0.  

    My theory is that if people want to get you something they will.  Saying no gifts just makes it more awkward, imo. Especially since there will always be some that bring them anyway, and those that don't will just feel stupid.

  • How about instead of saying no gifts do an "in lieu of gifts" line.  Then if people really want to do something they can donate money to a charity that possibly has something to do with children (a local women's center, teen mom support center, etc.).

    Total sidenote:  When it says no gifts I am always part of the minority that doesn't bring a gift and I feel like a huge d-bag.

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  • imagekimbo1216:

    imageWino0920:
    What about diaper party?

    Haha.  You must have missed the flaming the O13 board got for anyone thinking these are okay. lol.  That was actually my confession last week.  I had not clue until that post that a diaper shower was considered tacky.  oops.



    Really??? Lol! I think they are a great idea. They are very popular around here. Yea I guess I missed that post!
  • imageCousinVicki:
    a shower for baby 3?? nbsp;gifts or not, Cringeeeeeeeeee


    2


  • Doing this mobile now so multiple quotes are hard to manage!

    Re: diaper party, those are relatively common around here, but I CD and have enough neutral diapers with DD that I don't need any.

    Re: second showers, also very common around here, nobody really bats an eye at. I didn't even know they were frowned upon until TB.

    Re: BBQ, I live in Seattle, so late sept early oct weather is not exactly BBQ weather.

    Thanks for the suggestions so far, keep them coming please!


  • imagejennlin:
    Doing this mobile now so multiple quotes are hard to manage!

    Re: diaper party, those are relatively common around here, but I CD and have enough neutral diapers with DD that I don't need any.

    Re: second showers, also very common around here, nobody really bats an eye at. I didn't even know they were frowned upon until TB.

    Re: BBQ, I live in Seattle, so late sept early oct weather is not exactly BBQ weather.

    Thanks for the suggestions so far, keep them coming please!


    Bring a toy or child item to be donated to a nearby children's hospital or charity?

    Or just say no gifts and leave it that. People will do what they want to do.
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