YOU ARE HUGE!!!

ekoenig4

I work in a bank and deal with many people every day. Every customer wants to make a comment on my pregnancy and I expect this but I am so tired of listening to people tell me how huge I look and that I am going to "pop" any minute. I have 2 months to go and was planning on working until the end but I am getting so annoyed with the comments. Actually I'm not even that big yet, much smaller than I was with my first pregnancy. I can't imagine how much worse it will get... Any ideas on a response that is appropriate for a work environment?

jane.says

"Thank you ? just what every pregnant woman wants to hear!"

NeinerBopper13

I would just adjust to hearing it. I'm a homemaker & every time I go out, someone says something about how big I am, too. I would just smile & say "have a nice day!"- as hard as it will be, probably the best thing you can do

NeinerBopper13

jane.says:

"Thank you ? just what every pregnant woman wants to hear!"

LOL! Or this...

shelbell1028

I just smile, say something along the lines of "Only a few more weeks to go" and then try to change the subject.

ekoenig4

Oh I have pretty thick skin too BTW. This conversation happens every 5 minutes, for 9-10 hours a day....

melmcdaniel07

I feel your pain!  I'm at 32 weeks today and people keep telling me I won't make it to my due date (like they are professionals...).  It's bothered me a little bit but I just try and focus on what my doctor tells me, until she starts commenting I am trying not to worry about it too much.  Some people don't realize how hurtful such a harmless comment can be. 

RedLucia

I keep hearing, "You are Huge. You must be due soon!" I'm just entering the 3rd trimester, though.

I roll with it and say, "Just wait! I am going to get twice as big!"...like I am a supernatural anomaly of humanity. 

 

CaliforniaDream87

You deal.

You're pregnant and people will make comments. I'm over it at this point.

Khaleesi07

I had an interesting conversation this morning....

Random stranger: "Wow you look like you're about to give birth anyday!"
Me: "Actually I have about three months to go, but thanks"
Random stranger: "Oh well, just make sure you cut back on that coffee, it's not good for the baby!"
Me: "Actually, it's tea, but thanks for the advice. Make sure you cut back on the pastries, it's not good for your thighs! :-D"

 

I'm not normally that snarky, but I've been hearing so many annoying comments, I just hit my breaking point. Plus this woman managed to catch me before breakfast, and I'm always grouchy when I'm hungry :-P

I just try to remember that most people aren't trying to be rude on purpose, they just somehow have their foot in their mouth unintentionally. It's annoying, but it looks like we'll just have to deal with it until after the baby comes. Having a friendly but mildly snarky quip on hand is always a good way to stand your ground...say it with a smile and most people will hopefully get the hint :-)

 

 

kennazebrowsky

Next time just say what are you talking about? I am not pregnant LMAO

 

People are so rude and have no clue some times on what comes out of their mouths

vintageutopia

Just wink and say  "Yep, it IS the most obvious side effect of pregnancy, you know".

 

Honestly, if this is your second child, you should be used to Captain Obvious remarks by now. People are just making conversation, but some are better at it than others.

 

Frankly, I AM huge. It is my third kid and fourth pregnancy. From the back, my rear looks fine, but from the side or front...holybeachball. <shrug> I just can't get annoyed by people pointing out the obvious.

logoz80

Thanks, so are YOU!

trudibell

mainerocks:

Of course! There's another human being inside there!

ETA: That's the polite version... when my dad said it, I said, "There's another human being in there... what's your excuse?" ;-) 

I have always wanted the balls to ask someone "what's your excuse" after being told how big I am. 

trudibell

At the gym I work out at there is a cleaning lady who makes it her job to tell me everyday how huge I am.  I have started actively avoiding her, when I was 6 months along she said I looked like I could have given birth right there.  Now that I am a week away from my due date she tells me I must be having twins.  It sucks because I'm at a point where motivating myself to work out is becoming harder and harder and I don't need someone putting me down for it.

Anyway, for particularly bad comments like "jeeze lay off all the pizza!" by one of my colleagues, I just don't respond.  Also, I had to sit in on a lovely conversation between two men who had wanted to ask me if I was pregnant "but were afraid I just got fat, cause you know girls get mad about that sort of thing."  It's hard not to internalize it, but I basically said, "I'm pregnant, but I don't really make it a point to keep tabs of other peoples weights" and walked out of the room.

People just have absolutely no tact when it comes to pregnant women.  The things I have heard from strangers and people I thought were nice in the past few months are crazy. 

flkong

I agree with them because my stomach is big....I'm over the comments so whatevs. But two co-workers who had babies 5 & 6 months ago say it all the time. Pretty soon, I'm gonna say "yours is too, is another one in there?" 

thegoodpotato

Maybe I'm an attention whooore, but I don't mind the huge comments... I know I'm huge. No sense in being offended by it.

Although I can understand the frustration in having to have the same conversation again and again for 9 hours.  

Rmccaw13

Yeah in kinda getting tired of the comments now at 31 weeks. I'm 5'1 so baby is all out front. When people ask if I'm having twins or tell me I'm "huge" I agree and say I rather be huge then ugly and then stare at them... That usually works or in some cases I just smile and say f!?ck you!
I guess you get to a point where you don't care anymore about what you say

BabyBowers2013

mainerocks:

Of course! There's another human being inside there!

ETA: That's the polite version... when my dad said it, I said, "There's another human being in there... what's your excuse?" ;-) 

 

HA! I love the "what's your excuse part" I've actually used a version of that with a few of my male co workers who've asked if I am sure I am not having twins ;-)  

I Love my Dave

ekoenig4:

I work in a bank and deal with many people every day. Every customer wants to make a comment on my pregnancy and I expect this but I am so tired of listening to people tell me how huge I look and that I am going to "pop" any minute. I have 2 months to go and was planning on working until the end but I am getting so annoyed with the comments. Actually I'm not even that big yet, much smaller than I was with my first pregnancy. I can't imagine how much worse it will get... Any ideas on a response that is appropriate for a work environment?

 

I work at a bank also and I have had so many rude comments just wanted to say I feel your pain. 

lemondog

I hear ya, sister. It's beyond annoying. I want to punch everyone who makes comments about my body. I'm also a really private person and I don't like talking about my pregnancy at all. I don't even talk to my husband too much about it! My MIL constantly asks for updates after I go to my doctor and I've come so close to telling her to f off. It's not her fault...and totally well intended but I find it invasive. At the end of the day, people are dicks. And sadly, no, I have no advice for how to respond other than my totally inappropriate inner monologue. I just smile and keep on walking

Tiefling

I really don't understand why pregnant women fuhREAK out so much over this. I think the ppl making these comments assume that you wont take take their comment as insulting or offensive because... Its not. I guess what they aren't expecting is the massive and collective lack of reason among pregnant women. I mean seriously is it the hormones? So many pregnant women sit around complaining about how much weight they've gained EVEN if its a normal, healthy amount to gain during pregnancy but then if someone else even lightly acknowledges their size they get all bent out of shape over it??? Hell, I usually beat ppl to it, "Damn... I'm so freakin' huge! I feel like a big ol' house haha!"
What annoys ME is how so many ppl have gotten their heads bitten off for simply noticing that a pregnant women has, god forbid, gotten bigger that they feel the need to tiptoe around every carefully worded conversation I have with them. My own Doctors for sake! He goes "Well, you're gaining weight. I know thats probably not what you want to hear but..." Im like "Um actually it is... I am hoping to have a solid, three dimensional baby haha." I would think it'd be far more insulting to have someone assume/imply that I'm SO concerned with my weight or appearance or whatever it is that these ohsoinsulted pregnant women are concerned with that I'm expecting/hoping to NOT gain weight during my pregnancy. What IS that?! "Gee who cares if my baby's at a healthy weight as long as I maintain my excellent figure!"
Imho women everywhere need to get over themselves and realize that the whole wide world isn't out to offend them or damage their apparently very unstable self esteem. And hey, maybe as a result some of them may lighten up a bit in the process.

Cbuck2

I think what bugs me most about it is that it seems like being pregnant suddenly makes your body open for discussion. Under normal circumstances people don't really mention a stranger's/co-worker's/bank teller's body parts. But become pregnant and suddenly it's all fair game. I don't mind people acknowledging I'm pregnant (it's pretty obvious!), which is what I think people are probably trying to do in the first place. But things like "You look great" or "Is this your first?" seem so much more socially appropriate to me.

trudibell

somerandomchick:

Tiefling:

I really don't understand why pregnant women fuhREAK out so much over this. I think the ppl making these comments assume that you wont take take their comment as insulting or offensive because... Its not. I guess what they aren't expecting is the massive and collective lack of reason among pregnant women. I mean seriously is it the hormones? So many pregnant women sit around complaining about how much weight they've gained EVEN if its a normal, healthy amount to gain during pregnancy but then if someone else even lightly acknowledges their size they get all bent out of shape over it??? Hell, I usually beat ppl to it, "Damn... I'm so freakin' huge! I feel like a big ol' house haha!" What annoys ME is how so many ppl have gotten their heads bitten off for simply noticing that a pregnant women has, god forbid, gotten bigger that they feel the need to tiptoe around every carefully worded conversation I have with them. My own Doctors for sake! He goes "Well, you're gaining weight. I know thats probably not what you want to hear but..." Im like "Um actually it is... I am hoping to have a solid, three dimensional baby haha." I would think it'd be far more insulting to have someone assume/imply that I'm SO concerned with my weight or appearance or whatever it is that these ohsoinsulted pregnant women are concerned with that I'm expecting/hoping to NOT gain weight during my pregnancy. What IS that?! "Gee who cares if my baby's at a healthy weight as long as I maintain my excellent figure!" Imho women everywhere need to get over themselves and realize that the whole wide world isn't out to offend them or damage their apparently very unstable self esteem. And hey, maybe as a result some of them may lighten up a bit in the process.

No matter what my figure is, its nobody else's business. It's just not appropriate for a stranger to come up and start talking about my body. PERIOD. Whether its to say I look very pregnant or to catcall at me or to tell me to smile. It's all rude. My body is not here for public commentary, whether they're giving me compliments or not.

Absolutely this.  It's not that pregnant women need to "get over themselves" it's that strangers/coworkers/whoever needs to have more tact and politeness.  You wouldn't go up to a random person in a grocery store and say "wow you're so obese!" so why is it ok to comment to a pregnant woman?  It's different in a doctor's office, because a doctor might be making a comment regarding your health, and assumably you have a closer relationship with a doctor than you do with some random person in the street.

Glad ONE person is ok with being told she's huge.  Obviously that's not the norm. 

AnnaWhite89

Speaking of hormones.. Ha ha! Sounds like you are an 'ohsoinsulted pregnant woman' based on what annoys YOU! Hopefully your 'unstable self-esteem' doesn't sway as you are lightening up a bit. No pun intended! No one wants YOU to feel as though your weight is in anyway up for discussion.... Nice stereotypes though.

trudibell

AnnaWhite89:

Speaking of hormones.. Ha ha! Sounds like you are an 'ohsoinsulted pregnant woman' based on what annoys YOU! Hopefully your 'unstable self-esteem' doesn't sway as you are lightening up a bit. No pun intended! No one wants YOU to feel as though your weight is in anyway up for discussion.... Nice stereotypes though.

The only one talking about stereotypes and pregnant women is you.  It's rude to comment on someone else's body, period. 

AnnaWhite89

Oops! I meant to rely to Tiefling by quoting her ridiculously rude comments but it just posted as a regular response. To clarify, I agree, commenting on bodies is inappropriate and rude unless you are complimenting how great they look.

lyndz333

This happened to me at the school where I work; a parent said it to me. My sister said I should have said "Thanks! I'm due in January!" I liked that.