Mommy Melt Down

MSW_721

So I think I've had my hardest day yet with 2 kids. We had a play date with friends at the park and just getting both of them fed, dressed and lunches packed was exhausting enough. Needless to say I went with my hair pulled back, no makeup and in the same pants I slept in last night, lol. But we made it on time. DD cried a good bit of it for whatever reason, even with her in the Ktan which normally calms her down. DS had a lot of fun though and got to run off some energy so we stayed longer than I thought we would and into nap time. Which I knew would be a mistake and I paid for it with an overtired, tantrum toddler and a screaming infant when we got home. So I'm trying to nurse DD and am yelling at DS to go to bed and it just wasn't good and pretty soon I'm crying right along with them. I finally divided and conquered and let DS in his room to scream and throw his fit while I nursed DD. I then put her down (which resulted in her screaming again) to then focus my attention on DS enough to get him to sleep. Wow, two kids is definitely no joke and I feel like I'm relearning how to parent. And I hate losing my temper with my kids but the lack of sleep and stress is starting to catch up with me.

Any tricks? Encouragement? Care to share your own mommy melt downs?

ann_jeremiah

No melt downs yet... But close! DS1 is 22 months and DS2 is almost 6 weeks. Nap/bedtime is the disaster time.... I change and feed DS2 first, then put him in a room with the door shut so if he cries we won't really hear him loud and clear. Then I work on getting DS1 to sleep. Some days are easier than others and its definitely easier when DH is home.

jdveatch

This is helping me make my decision about having a 2nd child.  LOL!!!!    Hang in there.

PippaLee33

You're not alone!  I often get overwhelmed and frustrated and I feel like I end up taking it out on DD#1 when she is just being a typical 2 year old.  Somehow having two kids seems like a whole lot more than double the work right now but I hope it will get easier.  

I laugh now when I think about how stressed out I used to get when I just had one.  Props to the ladies out there with 3+ kids, I don't think I would survive. If these 8 weeks have taught me one thing, it's that I'm done having kids!

DanandVan

I know how rough that can be. My other 2 kids are 18 mo apart. Can you combine naps? The only way I survived was to have a group naptime. After lunch I would nurse DD1 and read books with DS in my bed until all 3 of us fell asleep.

Hope things get better for you soon!

Runaway22

I tend to lost my sh!t (internally) when baby is screaming in his carseat and there is NOTHING I can do about it. Or during a growth spurt / wonder week when he's really fussy at the wee hours for no reason, and I can't figure out which way is up. Those cries consume your consciousness. 

shibby00

OP it's hard. So hard. I consider it a great victory if I make it through the day without crying. I know I'm too hard on DD right now, but I'm doing the best I can. I keep telling myself it won't be like this for long. Eventually I'll get more sleep and things will be better. Honestly I try to avoid gong places with both kids. That always ends with DS screaming his head off. GL and know you are not alone!

toriwc

Mine are 19 months apart, and it is damn hard.  DD is going through an awful phase with NO! and hitting (I'd like to blame it on having the baby, but she started this before he was born), and my patience is wearing very, very thin. We're convinced we have a serial killer in the making, she can be so mean. I know the sleep deprivation isn't helping how I deal with her, but I am trying my best.

Like everything else, this too shall pass (hopefully).

amykins1283

I am right there with you. I feel like I am too hard on DS1 sometimes but I just don't know what to do when baby won't settle and the older one is running around just being a little you know what. Bedtime is the absolute worst when I am alone with both of them. Today was actually our first really good day, though, and I am actually starting to feel more confident in my ability to parent two kids.

guilletskichuk

I totally had a meltdown today and texted DH that I was "about to lose my sh!t" so I think it's funny that a PP felt the same way. Yay! We're not alone!

Today I was supposed to be at a shower for LO and I. It was scheduled for 4pm at my school. I thought, "this shouldn't be too bad considering I got myself, LO, and both step kids showered/bathed, fed, dressed and out the door by about 1pm for a family shower when LO was only 3 weeks old and while DH was in the hospital with pneumonia".

Wishful thinking.

Today I only had to get myself and LO ready as my DH was at work and my stepson was at school. Long story short...stepdaughter moved back to live with her mom two weeks ago. Anyways, the odds of us being ready on time for an even later time were in our favour today. Except that LO has been a major fusspot for the last 5ish days. On top of that, DH went back to work on Monday after being home from work for the last two weeks after getting out of the hospital so I was on my own again...WITH Mr. Crankypants.

He fussed most of the day. He cried bloody murder every time I tried putting him down. Thankfully, I had been able to get a shower in this morning while he napped. I didn't want to do my hair, makeup and get dressed up until the afternoon though. I didn't want to get dirty, linty, or spit up on. So I put on some clean pjs and waited to get ready until later in the afternoon.

Big mistake.

I finally had LO settled down by around 2:45 and started to prep his bottles and stuff to go in the diaper bag. He started fussing as I was doing this. I crossed my fingers that he would settle back down but no dice. I held him while I attempted putting on some makeup. I gave up on straightening my hair. I was thankful that I ironed my clothes last night because there is no way I would have gotten that done today. Anyways, I was finally making a bit if progress when LO started showing hunger cues and then bawling at around 3:30. Neither of us were dressed yet and I knew feeding and changing him were going to take a while. By this time, SS came home from school and was trying to offer his help but really couldn't help with anything. I started to cry as I ran up and down the stairs a gazillion times to feed and then change LO because I'd already packed stuff we needed in the diaper bag. Then I discovered that LO almost had a diaper blow out. Caught it in time but that delayed us even more. By the time we were supposed to be at the shower, I was finally just getting dressed. I had texted my hostess in the meantime and she was really understanding.

I finally got to the shower 20 minutes late and totally sweating up a storm. This was my first time taking LO out in his car seat on my own. We have gone for walks in his stroller but I haven't been able to carry his car seat until now due to my csection. I even overdid it today as my incision site was bleeding a bit when I got home. Ugh. Needless to say, I felt like a wreck and was late.

But we got through it and tomorrow is a new day.

I don't know that I could have another child though. How in the world do you ladies raise 2 or more young children?